Mastubation Question

[astegallrnc]

Seems you did NOT correctly read the precise thread you yourself cite here.

I believe this reply is addressed to me, and I do not believe I misread the thread I cited. If it I am mistaken, my apoligies.

I think the point of that thread does not permit a woman to use masturbation on herself say immediately after an act because that would still constitute a grave sin

The thread states “it can be part of the preparation for intercourse, or, if the husband reaches satisfaction first, it can be part of the afterplay. It only becomes masturbation if intercourse is not included at all.” There aren’t specifics mentioned on who or time frame but perhaps someone else will chime in with an answer.

Autumn

 

[fiat1122]

Point taken. I think the point should be stressed is that the woman’s masturbation should occur within the confines of lovemaking. Not when she’s home alone one Saturday afternoon while hubby’s playing golf and the “mood” hits her. That would be wrong.

SALUSHONOR…who are you talking to?

WHY wouls SHE need to masturbate IN lovemaking? In that context is not the HUSBAND to masturbate her?

 

[LeahInancsi]

WHY wouls SHE need to masturbate IN lovemaking? In that context is not the HUSBAND to masturbate her?

Let me rephrase that…when the woman is masturbated.

I hope she’s not having to do it herself! I know I should follow that with something appropriately funny, but I can’t think of anything appropriate for this forum.

 

[fiat1122]

Let me rephrase that…when the woman is masturbated.

I hope she’s not having to do it herself! I know I should follow that with something appropriately funny, but I can’t think of anything appropriate for this forum.

yes, lol.

 

[Valke2]

I have a question that I think I know the answer too, but have been in serious denail about. I have not masturbated in almost 2 years. However, my wife will often masturbate me to relieve me of my sexual stress and to relax me. So, my question is…Is it OK for a wife to masturbate her husband or to give him oral sex that ends in ejaculation, when it is not foreplay leading up to intercourse. I think the answer is that it is a sin, but I can’t find it written anywhere. All I found is that the Church has no official position on oral sex. If you say it is a sin, please include a reference so I can be 100% sure. I am weak, so the only way I will stop the bahavior is if I know for a fact the Church says it is wrong.

Thanks,

Chris

I’m not Catholic, but I don’t see how that would be different than the practice of pulling out before ejaculation in order to avoid pregnancy.

 

[setter]

I’m not Catholic, but I don’t see how that would be different than the practice of pulling out before ejaculation in order to avoid pregnancy.

The female fertility (egg) resides within her, while the male fertility (sperm) needs to be deposited within. The integrity of the conjugal act (openness to the *procreative potential) * is not violated as long as stimulation to climax for the wife occurs in the loving context of the conjugal act.

BTW – It is morally permissible for the wife to self-stimulate herself to climax after the husband completes if he is unwilling to do so.

 

[Trelow]

Having her masturbate you is no different than you engaging in a homosexual act.

They are both disordered abuse of the sexual organs that are closed to life, involving the defilement of two persons.

I for one, commend you on your honesty with yourself. Sexual sins are the hardest for one to break free of, and will be the first thing to sever one from the Church. Ever notice how most people who loose faith do so at the same time they become sexually active?

 

[setter]

WHY wouls SHE need to masturbate IN lovemaking? In that context is not the HUSBAND to masturbate her?

I will point out that the use of the word “masturbation” is incorrect in the context of completing the marital act. It is more accurately described as foreplay, afterplay, stimulatiuon, loving caress, …but anything but masturbation (which is always intrinsically disordered and gravely sinful behavior).

2352 By masturbation is to be understood the deliberate stimulation of the genital organs in order to derive sexual pleasure. “Both the Magisterium of the Church, in the course of a constant tradition, and the moral sense of the faithful have been in no doubt and have firmly maintained that masturbation is an intrinsically and gravely disordered action.” “The deliberate use of the sexual faculty, for whatever reason, outside of marriage is essentially contrary to its purpose.” For here sexual pleasure is sought outside of "the sexual relationship which is demanded by the moral order and in which the total meaning of mutual self-giving and human procreation in the context of true love is achieved." (CCC)

 

[Seatuck]

Good source for moral questions about sexuality and nfp questions.

canfp.org/artman/publish/index.shtml

 

[fiat1122]

Good source for moral questions about sexuality and nfp questions.

canfp.org/artman/publish/index.shtml

Is this site CATHOLIC, sure does NOT seem so: more like Cosmo magazine.

 

[Seatuck]

I have never seen an answer that contradicts what I know to be the Catholic position.

 

[KGM06]

However, my wife will often masturbate me to relieve me of my sexual stress and to relax me. So, my question is…Is it OK for a wife to masturbate her husband or to give him oral sex that ends in ejaculation, when it is not foreplay leading up to intercourse.

OK now I am confused after reading this thread.

Solo masturbation = sin
Ok that one is easy to understand

However, isn’t the above quote still a sexual act and not masturbation since the wife is performing the act upon her husband therefore perfectly OK?

Also reading this thread it seems to me that NFP would also be a sin because the couple is using biology and timing in order to NOT concieve therefore are NOT open to pregnancy.

I guess that I view masturbation as a solo act and once another person is involved, it is no longer considered masturbation

 

[LeahInancsi]

Also reading this thread it seems to me that NFP would also be a sin because the couple is using biology and timing in order to NOT concieve therefore are NOT open to pregnancy.

If that were the case, then a couple would have to have sex as often as humanly possible. No sleep, no work, nothing but sex. The only time they could abstain is during non-fertile times.:bigyikes:

 

[fiat1122]

OK now I am confused after reading this thread.

Solo masturbation = sin
Ok that one is easy to understand

However, isn’t the above quote still a sexual act and not masturbation since the wife is performing the act upon her husband therefore perfectly OK?

Also reading this thread it seems to me that NFP would also be a sin because the couple is using biology and timing in order to NOT concieve therefore are NOT open to pregnancy.

I guess that I view masturbation as a solo act and once another person is involved, it is no longer considered masturbation

and also, some guys as me are prone to get arroused for no reason at all almost, or at least from something as simple as hugging a woman, then because its a sin i don’t masturbate (I am a 35 year old guy) but if I don’t i get PAIN in the testicular area, would masturbating in this case be okay or still a so called grave sin?

 

[Trelow]

would masturbating in this case be okay or still a so called grave sin?

Offer it up for the salvation of souls from sexual impurity.

 

[KGM06]

and also, some guys as me are prone to get arroused for no reason at all almost, or at least from something as simple as hugging a woman, then because its a sin i don’t masturbate (I am a 35 year old guy) but if I don’t i get PAIN in the testicular area, would masturbating in this case be okay or still a so called grave sin?

That happened to me while I was in the Navy.
I also was not a practicing Catholic at the time.
I went to Sick Call and my Doc (a real crusty old salt- 4 tours in Vietnam type) told me to take matters into my own hands. Thankfully that hasn’t happened since I came back to the Church.
I know it is hard to not get aroused. I’m suffering thru the same problem (and i’m 39yrs old). Just seeing my gorgeous girlfriend, or talking to her on the phone sets it off. All I can do is try my best to ignore it and Pray for more willpower to overcome.

 

[Ignatius]

Interestingly, your wife IS allowed to masturbate (herself or with your help) to orgasm if intercourse did not produce climax for her. Go figure…yet another advatage of being female (?)

Are you saying tha tyou don’t understand the theology behind this?

 

[Dan_Brown_2]

This is a perfectly natural thing to do. The Church cannot dictate to whether this is a sin or not, just as they cannot dictate the laws of nature.I was actually told by a priest once that many priests do mastubate as a form of relief but he would not tell me anything more. This is the truth.

 

[mercygate]

This is a perfectly natural thing to do. The Church cannot dictate to whether this is a sin or not, just as they cannot dictate the laws of nature.I was actually told by a priest once that many priests do mastubate as a form of relief but he would not tell me anything more. This is the truth.

The Church does not “dictate” whether something is a sin any more than she dictates the laws of nature. Get a good introduction to the concept of the Natural Law. For humans, “laws of nature” include the use of reason.

Whatever a priest may have indiscreetly told you about the personal habits of his colleagues does not change the “truth” of the natural moral law. What about the “many” priests who are continent?

 

[DailyBread]

I second that mercy gate and follow up with the fact that people cannot use an arguement: the priest said it was okay so I am not guilty. The magisterium is not ruled by majority, but by the will of God acting through the hierarchy HE chose. Priests are human and I bet many of them tell people in confession this to justify their own actions. Not all priests make the best confessors sadly and we must find ones who are in line with the Church’s teachings. There is a right and wrong and to avoid this teaching by the church still makes you guilty (as opposed to others who are ignorant and mislead by others without any knowledge that masturbation could be a sin… so if you are reading this and wonder if it is, check all major Examination of Conscience booklets written by good confessors and all will list masturbation as a grave sin). Masturbation is not the Way of followers of the cross… sacrifice is and that is why only pleasure in the gift of self to one’s spouse is acceptable. Jesus said “The Father and I are ONE” not that they are seperate. The joy of their divine head is found in their complete selfless union, not by becoming seperate. The Mystery of the Trinity is the Mystery of Love and anything that is blasphemous to that mystery is not love… ie masturbation. And any act that lacks LOVE is SINFUL… masturbation is not an act of Love but selfish seeking of pleasure. Anyone who seeks his own life will lose it, but whoever loses his life will find it.