Masturbation again and again....

  • Thread starter Thread starter RoyalamI
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
R

RoyalamI

Guest
It happened again. It started out as a torturous headache filled with foul, lustful thoughts. Every vein in my body was pumping a mile a minute. Satan had me in his grasp. I became weak and broken. I gave in to mortal sin again. I have done this so many times.

Masturbation is my achilles heel. Every time I try to stop it just hits back harder leaving me in a spiral of depression, knowing that I have hurt my Lord. I started to withhold from masturbation for probably 3 months now. The longest I can go without is 3 weeks. I have prayed every day to our Lady and our Father over and over to free me of my sexual temptations, yet I fall.

It’s the most immature and stupidest thing anybody could get themselves tangled in. I just want it to be over. I want the lust to go away, the urge to be decimated, and the sensations to be destroyed. I want it all to go away. God should crush me right now, because I clearly will never learn and will keep on sinning against him. I’m afraid I will be cast into the fires of hell for what I’ve done.

I would literally give anything to prevent me from committing this stupid mortal sin. I feel hopeless and further from God. I want to be with him, but I cant and at times I think I never will be able to be with me. I am an awful sinner. I fall so many times even though I have the strength to press on. I have fallen to this sin 4 or 5 times after realizing it was of grave matter. Of course I’ll go to confession for this, but I bet I will end up in the same position I am in now a few weeks later. God save me.
 
I know it’s hard. It will take time, but realize that the Lord is always with you every step you take in your journey to Christ. When you feel helpless go and love God, for he loves you and will never abandon you.

You may be an awful sinner, but we all are. We all fall, but it’s the willingness to get back up and try again, which makes us warriors of Christ, combatants against sin. You are wonderful in so many ways.

You will fight this battle, but even though you will fall you always will hold tightly your shield and sword. Your Lord and your faith. Soon, dear friend, you will be nurtured in the warm embrace of the Lord. He will save you.

With my greatest love and admiration,

God Bless
 
I can see that you are trying very, very hard, and are very repentant for your sin. Your contrition is obvious, and that is what will help you to be saved. Go on through all this turmoil; your fortitude and courage will pay out in the end.

Keep on praying and begging God to help you out of these temptations. I also suggest you post a thread in the Prayer Intentions forum to ask for prayers in support of your battle.

I also suggest that you pray the St. Michael the Archangel prayer three times whenever you are seriously tempted. I have found in the past that it is immensely helpful when these temptations assail, and may even help you to conquer them.

My prayers are with you.
 
You are not going to hell.

Jesus is unmoved by the fact you have committed a Mortal sin in the form of masturbation.

Jesus is only pleased and happy to know that you are getting up time after time you fall and going to confession.
You have contrition and we can see it.

You will get over it… don’t worry… But if you should die, you will go to heaven because Jesus is very happy to know that you are getting up time after time and going to confession because you Love Jesus… Why would you go to confession to confess your evil duties to a man (Priest) if you didn’t love Jesus?

Jesus loves you and he will help you.

I recommend keeping a blessed Rosary in your pocket. And every time you touch it, say “Holy Mary, pray for me for purity.”
 
I am exactly where you are as well friend, and I understand the overwhelming urge that accompanies this addiction.

Partake of confession, and continue trying. I believe, and hope for the sake of souls such as ours, that God recognizes our struggles to overcome this sin, and will look upon us with mercy when we do depart this life.

Oh, and don’t feel too bad about your four or five times. I’ve been trying to stop, in earnest, for over a year now. I’m averaging failure once a week still… I might have managed to get it to a week and a half. Hence, I’ve been attending confession pretty much weekly… Don’t give up, it’s a hard battle, but one that’s well worth the fight. Those periods of time where I feel no attraction to the sin are liberating, and let me know what I’m working towards. Keep at it, you’ll get there eventually!
 
I’m sorry to hear you are having such a difficult time. Do not despair, because Satan will use it to drag you back into sin. Instead, rejoice in the great hope and mercy of our God!

You are learning to hate your sinful habit, which is the primary thing that will help you to turn away. You must learn to hate that thing. Be encouraged! Three weeks is great progress! When you hit the three week mark, watch carefully for temptations. Just try to make it though one more day, and then another. Talk to your confessor. He’s dealt with this a thousand times, and may have some help for you.

“These things I have spoken to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation, but be of good cheer: I have overcome the world.” John 16:33
 
Try meditating and reflecting on Bible passages every day for around 15 minutes, specifically Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John. Also try to stay busy. Keep good images in your imagination when bad images pop up, Examples: imagines of beautiful flowers, the ocean, mountains etc.
I’ll Pray for you.

Also check out this recording on: ‘Maintaining Purity: by Virtue or by Force’

audiosancto.org/sermon/20040307-Maintaining-Purity-by-Virtue-or-by-Force.html
 
Masturbation is happening normally when someone passing from childhood to adulthood and in some cases it grows from trial to habit to addiction. It is considered to be normal act for any person as part of growth from one stage of life to the other but when it becomes habit/addiction it is better to look at it. From the psychosocial and psycho-sexual perspective the pulling and pushing element of the act of masturbation among the young people are a tension relieving activity than a pleasure seeking activity. Usually when one experiences a sort of unexpressed pain, confusion or misunderstanding due to his/her fear, anger or pride or mixer/combination of these that are insecurity, inferiority and superiority lead him/her to enter into masturbation in your case and in other cases it could be smoking, alcohol, drugs, pornography, etc. It is an excellent practice to confess this action and I can recommend that while you reflecting about it look back to identify what could be the pulling or pushing element leads to do this particular activity. Usually in counseling cases I could find that such serius awareness itself many are getting out from such practices. Thank you.
 
You’ve gotten some great advice from other posts. Just like any other sin, the fact that you are showing hatred towards it is a wonderful step. I think you really need to gather all the bits and pieces of strength you have. You are not defined by sin, but by the love our God has for you. You are not weak, you are definitely, a trillion percent stronger than your sin. You must not give up. Do not let your sin control you, you control it, with Jesus nothing is impossible. Trust in Him and trust in His mercy. You can do it, you are much stronger than your sin.

Sorry I can’t say much 😦 but can I offer you my prayers?

Most Divine, merciful, loving I ask that you help this person battle the sin they are facing. Most loving, nothing is impossible in your hands, I trust in your mercy.
Mother Mary, Archangel Michael, Gabriel and Raphael, we ask that you pray with us.

Our father who art in heaven, hallowed be your name
Your kingdom come Your will be done
On earth as it is in heaven
Give us this day our daily bread
And forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us
Lead us not into temptation
But deliver us from evil
Amen
:gopray2:
 
I know it is difficult to stop this problem, however, I have some good news for folks. When you get past sixty, with some people it is sooner, the temptations go down and eventually simmer out. The need decreases, and in time, your body won’t even let you do these sins because they won’t work anymore. Then you can focus on other things better and go on with your life without this sin afflicting you anymore.
 
I take Paxil fro depression and I find the it eliminates sexual desire. Perhaps talk to your doctor.
 
RoyalamI said:
It happened again. It started out as a torturous headache filled with foul, lustful thoughts. Every vein in my body was pumping a mile a minute. Satan had me in his grasp. I became weak and broken. I gave in to mortal sin again. I have done this so many times.

Masturbation is my achilles heel. Every time I try to stop it just hits back harder leaving me in a spiral of depression, knowing that I have hurt my Lord. I started to withhold from masturbation for probably 3 months now. The longest I can go without is 3 weeks. I have prayed every day to our Lady and our Father over and over to free me of my sexual temptations, yet I fall.

It’s the most immature and stupidest thing anybody could get themselves tangled in. I just want it to be over. I want the lust to go away, the urge to be decimated, and the sensations to be destroyed. I want it all to go away. God should crush me right now, because I clearly will never learn and will keep on sinning against him. I’m afraid I will be cast into the fires of hell for what I’ve done.

I would literally give anything to prevent me from committing this stupid mortal sin. I feel hopeless and further from God. I want to be with him, but I cant and at times I think I never will be able to be with me. I am an awful sinner. I fall so many times even though I have the strength to press on. I have fallen to this sin 4 or 5 times after realizing it was of grave matter. Of course I’ll go to confession for this, but I bet I will end up in the same position I am in now a few weeks later. God save me.
Click to expand...
Sorry about your struggle. I struggled with it for years. Where do you do it? Put pictures of Jesus, the Virgin, and the Saints everywhere in view of where you do it. Make sure you can see the pictures where it normally happens. Hang rosaries on the walls. These images can strengthen the mind and help you avoid it when it happens. You will suffer. It takes a few months before the cravings subside. But its worth it. God bless you!
 
Maybe reading more things will help. I’m specifically thinking about Theology of the Body materials. I mean, you might’ve heard that yeah, you shouldn’t masturbate, and you shouldn’t have sex outside of marriage, etc. Do you know why? I just finished an introduction to theology of the body by Christopher West, and it was pretty awesome. It gave the Catholic perspective, which I knew, but it also gives another, deeper perspective. It was great and I’m planning on reading it again soon. 🙂

Otherwise, I’d recommend praying, as you already are, but maybe not so much as to not masturbate, but to transform your urges into pure and chaste love for your future spouse (whatever your vocation may be).

Something else to consider is that you can’t overcome these on your own–but you can with help from Jesus. 🙂 Offer up your struggles to him. When I have trouble, I say something along the lines of, “Jesus, I’m having trouble again with [whatever]. I know I’m weak and I know I can’t do it on my own, but I know you can help me. Please take these struggles (I might go into more specifics here) and transform them. Help me use them to come closer to you. Help me.” And just surrender yourself to Jesus. Remember Hebrews 2:18–Jesus has been through all the struggles we face. He can help you get through it. He got through them because he’s God; we are most definitely not.

I’ll say a prayer for you! 🙂
 
RoyalamI said:
It happened again. It started out as a torturous headache filled with foul, lustful thoughts. Every vein in my body was pumping a mile a minute. Satan had me in his grasp. I became weak and broken. I gave in to mortal sin again. I have done this so many times.

Masturbation is my achilles heel. Every time I try to stop it just hits back harder leaving me in a spiral of depression, knowing that I have hurt my Lord. I started to withhold from masturbation for probably 3 months now. The longest I can go without is 3 weeks. I have prayed every day to our Lady and our Father over and over to free me of my sexual temptations, yet I fall.

It’s the most immature and stupidest thing anybody could get themselves tangled in. I just want it to be over. I want the lust to go away, the urge to be decimated, and the sensations to be destroyed. I want it all to go away. God should crush me right now, because I clearly will never learn and will keep on sinning against him. I’m afraid I will be cast into the fires of hell for what I’ve done.

I would literally give anything to prevent me from committing this stupid mortal sin. I feel hopeless and further from God. I want to be with him, but I cant and at times I think I never will be able to be with me. I am an awful sinner. I fall so many times even though I have the strength to press on. I have fallen to this sin 4 or 5 times after realizing it was of grave matter. Of course I’ll go to confession for this, but I bet I will end up in the same position I am in now a few weeks later. God save me.
Click to expand...
It sounds to me that the bigger temptation is not the masturbation itself but the despair when you fall.

I struggled with masturbation for about 20 years before God gave me the grace to stop entirely. The temptations I experienced were similar to your… the overwhelming urges to masturbate and then the feelings of despair, that God was angry with me, that I’d never be able to stop, how terrible a person I was after I had fallen. But in hindsight, I realize that the enemy tempts us to fall and then tempts us to stop us from getting up again and relying completely on Jesus.

Often, Christ allows us to fall, because our fall brings us running back to Him. He is more concerned with us turning back to Him that He is our fall.
“If it hadn’t been for this small imperfection, you wouldn’t have come to Me. Know that as often as you come to Me, humbling yourself and asking My forgiveness, I pour out a superabundance of graces on your soul, and your imperfection vanishes before My eyes, and I see only your love and your humility. You lose nothing but gain much… (1293)” - Christ to St. Faustina in the Diary of St. Faustina
Click to expand...
What has helped me is not focusing on the temptation of masturbation itself, but focusing on how Christ sees me. If I think, “In order to be a good and holy person, I must not masturbate,” I am actually falling for the greater sin of pride. I am trying to rely on my own strength and not on God.
“You see My child what you are of yourself. The cause of your falls is that you rely too much on yourself and too little on Me…You are dealing with a God of mercy, which your misery can NOT exhaust…the greatest obstacles to holiness (your purpose here below) are discouragement and exaggerated anxiety…Sensitivity and discouragement are the fruits of self love…strive to make My love reign in place of your self love…and as often as you beg for My pardon for your faults, you glorify My Mercy. Let no temptation disturb your interior peace…not even momentarily. Take My Mercy…the vessel of Trust and draw from this fountain of Life.” - Christ to St. Faustina
Click to expand...
My advice, recognize the deeper temptation for what it is. No matter the gravity of our sin, the worse sin is refusing the mercy of God. Trust in Jesus.
“The Lord loves the gates of Zion more than all the dwellings of Jacob.” ~Psalm 87
Click to expand...
By your sin, you can ask Me to leave…but I sit at your gates. My preference is for you.
Click to expand...
 
Hey man, keep your head up! You have been offered good advice already…just know that God looks down on you with love and will reward your desire and effort to be in total conformity to His will and goodness.

You’re in my prayers!
 
Robert_Sock said:
I take Paxil fro depression and I find the it eliminates sexual desire. Perhaps talk to your doctor.
Click to expand...
Please don’t tell me your recommending someone talk to a doctor about taking a drug to suppress sexual desire? If so, that is one of the most horrible, absurd, ridiculous things I’ve even heard on these forums. If I read the OPS post right, he doesn’t have “clinical depression”, but gets depressed about the fact that he masturbated and offends God.

Masturbation is a tough struggle. The Lord understands. Work on it. Yeah, its tough, especially as we are such sexually driven creatures. You can\will overcome it, but don’t even think about going to extremes such as drugs or anything else. That’s going to cause far worse issues.
 
Actually woke up this morning thinking about your post, the desperate tone and panic of it and wanted to console.

We are combatants in a war and our enemy is unassailable by us. In such events, I turn to the Lord and remind him (thereby reminding myself) that I will always fail without his constant attention.

I remind myself that I cannot commit a sin God has not seen, that he knows the turf and he knows me. Sometimes after falling I have felt God’s urgent embrace. He has compassion for us, weak as we are, and for me personally and will not allow me to be lost.Only I can separate myself from God, not by the commission of this sin per se, but by accepting the sin, normalizing it, promoting it and making it my way of life. If I am in battle, although I am temporarily defeated I am never cut off from God. Between God and me its a case of true love fully animated with quarrels, failures, forgiveness, compassion and yes, joy.

On a practical level, I have found the most benefit from extinguishing the fantasy life. I cannot prevent the onrush of temptation. Thoughts come to me, I do not go to them. But I can refuse to give them permission to hang around. I remind myself that these unworthy thoughts bear no relationship to reality and refuse to suspend disbelief. I take a look in the mirror and say this is who I really am, warts and all, not the hero of the erotic drama I want to play out in my brain. Very often, by refusing to fantasize, I am able to take the steam off.

Nonetheless because I am fully human, I will despite all occasionally fail. In such cases, do the right thing, yes, but give yourself a break! Hope this helps.
 
rotlex said:
Please don’t tell me your recommending someone talk to a doctor about taking a drug to suppress sexual desire? If so, that is one of the most horrible, absurd, ridiculous things I’ve even heard on these forums. If I read the OPS post right, he doesn’t have “clinical depression”, but gets depressed about the fact that he masturbated and offends God.

Masturbation is a tough struggle. The Lord understands. Work on it. Yeah, its tough, especially as we are such sexually driven creatures. You can\will overcome it, but don’t even think about going to extremes such as drugs or anything else. That’s going to cause far worse issues.
Click to expand...
Yes, I would suggest talking to the doctor about possible use of Paxil to control the troublesome libido.
 
rotlex said:
Please don’t tell me your recommending someone talk to a doctor about taking a drug to suppress sexual desire? If so, that is one of the most horrible, absurd, ridiculous things I’ve even heard on these forums. If I read the OPS post right, he doesn’t have “clinical depression”, but gets depressed about the fact that he masturbated and offends God.
Click to expand...
I agree with you.

The sides effects of this drug are quite shocking, and include:
Sexual dysfunction is a common side effect with SSRIs. Specifically, side effects often include difficulty becoming aroused, lack of interest in sex, and anorgasmia (trouble achieving orgasm). Genital anesthesia,[31] loss of or decreased response to sexual stimuli, and ejaculatory anhedonia are also possible. Although usually reversible, these sexual side effects can last for months or years after the drug has been completely withdrawn.[32] This is known as post SSRI sexual dysfunction.
Click to expand...
To recommend it as a way of dealing with masturbation is even more shocking.

Sarah x 🙂
 
Robert_Sock said:
Yes, I would suggest talking to the doctor about possible use of Paxil to control the troublesome libido.
Click to expand...
Why would a doctor prescribe an addictive antidepressant with a plethora of not so pleasant side effects for masturbation?

Furthermore, one of the arguments against using birth control pills is it adversely affects one’s ability to select the right person as their spouse. Well, guess what? Any drug that affects one sex drive and mood will do the same thing.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top