Masturbation dream issues.

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SilverDragon said:
It’s not natural though. It’s not normal or natural to be aroused by committing sacrilegious or criminal acts. If it were just normal sex dreams that would be one thing, but this stuff is just so extreme, stuff you couldn’t even depict in porn.
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It is rather a challenge when every valid suggestion is met with a correponding impossibility.

The use of certain pharmacological agents will affect dreams…that is a discussion to have with your physician and neither I nor anyone else here is allowed by forum rules and also professional ethics to give you medical advice beyond “talk to your physician.”

Personally, as a priest, I have a physician who is Catholic…and that in part because of the issue of Catholic morality in various medical procedures, particularly and above all as I approach end of life. I have every confidence that my physician, a faithful Catholic, is astute in these areas.

Next, the concerns you address about the morality of these dreams could be effectively addressed with a priest, particularly a priest knowledgeable in this area. I studied psychology, to be a psychologist, before entering seminary. There are priests, I can assure you, for whom this discussion would, in fact, be very clinical and not at all off-putting. But that is your choice. I can certainly understand that the issue of his being ordained – even though perhaps also a clinical psychologist – could affect your sensibility, as could the difference in gender.

Another alternative is to seek out a female Catholic mental health care provider (whom you would select based on her Catholic religious identity) who can help you to work through the various issues. The dreams, I am sure, are not without meaning. A psychologist who is a faithful Catholic could help you with that issue, be it one as simple as reviewing your medications and finding an origin there – or something of another nature, which they could help you work through and resolve.

They are also best placed as well as address the concerns of the issue of morality in a state of altered consciousness and also the acquired behaviour pattern of aversion to touching sacred/spiritual things after these experiences, etc.

All of this is not to imply that I think you are in need of long term therapy but a few visits could clear up many things.

People not experienced with the phenomenon that you appear to be experiencing can very lightly dismiss the matter based on their own personal experiences or non-professional supposition of what it is you are experiencing. That is unfortunate when people comment in areas beyond what they should comment…but such comments on issues like this should have no more influence on your decisions than would untoward comments related to other health related issues – they are evaluated for what they are and dismissed.

Given how much these events are evidently disturbing you, the route of the female Catholic mental health therapist would seem both the best available avenue and the one least likely to disturb your various sensibilities.
 
robertmidwest said:
Yes. Look at the profile history. There are only something like 25 post over the last 2 years. Every single one is about the same subject.

I am dubious about the true intentions of the poster. The subject of deviant sex coming up over and over again for two years now.
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I have a regular account, but I have too many people who know and can connect it to me to be comfortable posting this sort of stuff on it. But I am a regular reader/poster.
 
SilverDragon said:
And I don’t feel like I have anywhere to go to talk about it in real life.
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Neither did I when I was tormented with scrupulosity. Look… if you do not want to seek help, what is it that you want? How do you expect to beat this thing tormenting you? Nobody is going to be able to give you a magic suggestion on these forums that will teach you how to let this go. You must have a mustard seed of courage to seek help. If you are too shy to talk to a priest about this, seek out a woman religious spiritual director. She will help you! You want help don’t you? Well, it wont necessarily be easy but it will be doable. I got a spiritual director within like 2 months of looking. Maybe one month. Isn’t that worth getting over this? At least ask your parish priest to help you get one. Can you, at least, do that? They will not charge you money but what they can give you will be more valuable than money.

Even better might be what Father suggested, a female Catholic mental health therapist. Is there a Catholic charities close to you? Look them up and try calling them. Maybe you can look for a spiritual director too though.
 
SilverDragon said:
I used to masturbate a lot, but I stopped 5 years ago - a bit before I entered RCIA. Basically as soon as I realized it was wrong. The trouble is I’ve been plagued off and on with highly disturbing sex dreams - dreams that involve disturbing, fetishistic, and often even criminal sexual behavior. Often I seem to “wake up” and decide to masturbate to these images, only to actually wake up later on. I wake up feeling very aroused.

The trouble is these images make me feel filthy and interfere with my spiritual life. I can’t bear to pray or to think on anything holy or touch any religious items after waking up for the guilt I feel. On Sundays it’s especially bad because I can’t focus on Mass at all for the memory of the images.

I don’t know what’s going on. I don’t know where to turn, no amount of prayers or anything seems to have any effect on these dreams. I have lived perfectly chastely and yet these dreams get worse and worse as time goes on. My only clue is they get worse the more stress I’m under.
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The best thing is to ignore it as much as you can and don’t let it get you down. Remember that dreams alone are not a sin unless you act on them. Well done on breaking the habit and living a chaste life. This is true devotion to God.

From what you describe it sounds like it could be a form of diabolical oppression but I am no expert. The videos below might be of some help in discerning this.
youtube.com/watch?v=AiYh96TrITE
youtube.com/watch?v=Tq-ppsQ9zkA

Other things you can try are below.
  1. Confession. Regular confession (once a week) is the most effective in breaking these sorts of things. It has to be a good sincere confession. If you can reveal some of the details to the priest he may be in a better position to help you.
  2. Wear the Scapular of Benediction and Protection. It has to be blessed in the Old Rite. (The new rite is not that effective). If you cannot get this then a miraculous medal would be good. Once again blessed in the Old Rite.
    sacramentals.org/ScapularofBenediction.htm
  3. Holy Water and Holy Salt. Some churches have the holy water you can drink this can be very effective. Also anointing with holy oil and saying a prayer for protection before going to bed.
  4. Get rid of any lucky charms, magic stones, statues of eastern gods etc… that may be in your home. Try to get your home blessed by a priest.
  5. Prayer. Specific sets of prayers can be very effective. Below is a list:
    Litany to The Most Holy Name of Jesus (for Deliverence). Litany to Our Lady of Deliverence.
    Prayers to St. Michael the Archangel, St. Raphael, Prayers to your Guardian Angel. (catholictradition.org/Litanies/litany6.htm)
    (catholictradition.org/saint-michael7.htm)
The following set of prayers have been know to be very effective:
auxiliumchristianorum.org/prayers.html
(Use ONLY the one for Lay Members. Do Not use the one for Priests)

You don’t have to do all of these at once. Some may be more helpful than others. Prayers in front of the Blessed Sacrament can be very effective.
  1. Communion. Attend mass and receive communion daily if possible or as often as you can. Once a week may not be enough. Try to remain in a state of grace at all times.
  2. Self control. Build virtue and self control. It is difficult to say exactly how to do this as it varies for each individual. This helps to develop the will power to resist temptation. Just because there is temptation does not mean we have to give into it. Remember your will is your own and no one can take that from you.
  3. Recreation. Recreation time is also a virtue. It can help relieve the anxiety. Spending time with friends or any other things you might enjoy. (As long as it is time spent away from the TV).
  4. Socializing. Are you getting enough social contact? This should be with people of good moral character and a place where you feel comfortable to be yourself.
  5. Inner healing. Do you feel there are any psychological wounds from your past that still need healing. Could it be that this is manifesting itself as dreams.
God’s love is above everything we can imagine like an infinitely high fortress of protection we can always rely on.

I wish you all the best.
 
robertmidwest said:
You have two accounts?
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You seem surprised by this. As a priest, I had submitted a series of questions about the forum’s operation and was informed, specific to that point, one is not precluded from having a second user account but its use must conform to forum rules.
 
robertmidwest said:
Yes. Look at the profile history. There are only something like 25 post over the last 2 years. Every single one is about the same subject.

I am dubious about the true intentions of the poster. The subject of deviant sex coming up over and over again for two years now.
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The original poster created a thread in August 2014, September 2014, February 2016, and October 2016. You consider this “over and over again for two years now?”

The subject of her posts are not deviant sex…the subject of her posts are the issue of what she is experiencing in an altered state of consciousness.
 
robertmidwest said:
You have two accounts?
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Yes, I have two accounts. Like I said, I don’t want my main account linked to this issue - so this account is for stuff I wouldn’t want anyone who connected the dots on my main account to see.
 
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