Masturbation question..

  • Thread starter Thread starter clouded_coffee
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
C

clouded_coffee

Guest
Hello, I’m new here and I need a bit of advice.

See, I have a problem with masturbation, I’ve been doing it since I was very very young (I honestly don’t know why I started). I’ve been struggling to quit since I was 13 when I found out what I was doing, and three years later I’ve managed to reduce the instances where I perform this act. I’ve also managed to p(name removed by moderator)oint where and when I I do it. The problem is, its in my bed when I’m about to go to sleep or when I’m half awake (sometimes I don’t even realize what I’m doing until I’m finished cause I’m so tired). Does anyone have any advice on how to handle this? I would try just getting myself out of bed if I feel the urge, but then I’d be up for an hour or two in the middle of the night extremely tired. If not advice, prayers are appreciated 🙂
 
clouded_coffee said:
Hello, I’m new here and I need a bit of advice.

See, I have a problem with masturbation, I’ve been doing it since I was very very young (I honestly don’t know why I started). I’ve been struggling to quit since I was 13 when I found out what I was doing, and three years later I’ve managed to reduce the instances where I perform this act. I’ve also managed to p(name removed by moderator)oint where and when I I do it. The problem is, its in my bed when I’m about to go to sleep or when I’m half awake (sometimes I don’t even realize what I’m doing until I’m finished cause I’m so tired). Does anyone have any advice on how to handle this? I would try just getting myself out of bed if I feel the urge, but then I’d be up for an hour or two in the middle of the night extremely tired. If not advice, prayers are appreciated 🙂
Click to expand...
Hi clouded_coffee!

Firstly, WELCOME TO CAF! I hope you enjoy your experience with these forums, I have found them to be a great resource for my own spiritual journey.

In regards to your question, this is a very common problem for men. I highly recommend you get a spiritual director. Online resources and books can only do so much. At the very least, schedule an appointment with your local priest and ask him what he recommends.

If you can’t get a spiritual director, try to get in the habit of having a regular confessor. I’m not saying avoid going to confession to other priests, but pick one priest to be your regular confessor and try to go to him once a month. Each time you go, recollect ALL your sins from the last time you had confession with him (even the ones already confessed).

Since you are tempted more at night while you are in bed, be sure to excercise regularly during the day and eliminate or at least cut back on caffeine. Try to eat a lighter dinner as well. All of these things will help make you more tired at the end of the day and (hopefully) you’ll go right to sleep. In the morning, don’t allow yourself to stay in bed, the second you wake up, GET UP!

If you find yourself tempted in the shower, take cold (or at least lukewarm) showers. If you find yourself tempted by pornography, avoid using the internet when you are by yourself. Never just get on the internet and surf. Rather, only get on when you have something you need to do. Make a list before you access the internet of all the things you need to use it for, then once you are finished shut down the computer and don’t use it again. Especially avoid using the internet late at night. Unless its urgent, it can wait until the next day. If you look at pornography on your phone, then cancel your data plan, it’s not worth your soul!

Those are all just some basic pointers to get you started, but you should definitely seek the counsel of a priest. They will be able to help you far better!

Best of luck! I will say a prayer for you!
 
Hello, and welcome to the Catholic Answers Forums! 👋

I am fifteen and dealing with the same issue myself, and it is byfar the toughest battle I have ever fought (and am constantly fighting). :nunchuk:

The advice I can give you is this. Try to go to adoration as much as possible. Ask Jesus for help in your struggles and He WILL help. Just believe and He will do the rest. Also, when going to bed, try to say the rosary right before sleeping. It will greatly help.

Also, remember that masterbating is a mortal sin (of course you know that, you wouldn’t have posted your question if you didn’t) and you need to go to confession if you haven’t gone already.

I’ll be praying for you, and please pray for me as well. I definitely need it! 🙂

God bless,

Alex
 
I and many many many many others are right here with you. the times i have strung together a couple months of chastity have been with the strength of our blessed lady. when the urge hits start your rosary, you’ll likely wake up in the morning not remembering how far into the rosary you got, but thankful that you held off your urge another night.

another thing that helped me was to see the absolute and unconditional wrongness, and unacceptability of my self defiling act, from the standpoint of my Judge. this helped me take it off the table as an option. be careful with that one though, cause its a hard fall when you do.

be blessed
 
Not to long ago, I prayed a novena to the Holy Wounds of Jesus asking for a “cure.” On the 9th day, I went to the local Catholic bookstore and found a great prayer book entitled “The Holy Rosary For Purity of Body, Mind, and Spirit: Praying For Healing From Sexual Sins” This has been a major help for me, and I’ve never felt freer from temptation, even though I haven’t masturbated or engaged in any other sin against chastity for 11 months. Try to find it.
 
smichhertz said:
Hi clouded_coffee!

Firstly, WELCOME TO CAF! I hope you enjoy your experience with these forums, I have found them to be a great resource for my own spiritual journey.

In regards to your question, this is a very common problem for men. I highly recommend you get a spiritual director. Online resources and books can only do so much. At the very least, schedule an appointment with your local priest and ask him what he recommends.

If you can’t get a spiritual director, try to get in the habit of having a regular confessor. I’m not saying avoid going to confession to other priests, but pick one priest to be your regular confessor and try to go to him once a month. Each time you go, recollect ALL your sins from the last time you had confession with him (even the ones already confessed).

Since you are tempted more at night while you are in bed, be sure to excercise regularly during the day and eliminate or at least cut back on caffeine. Try to eat a lighter dinner as well. All of these things will help make you more tired at the end of the day and (hopefully) you’ll go right to sleep. In the morning, don’t allow yourself to stay in bed, the second you wake up, GET UP!

If you find yourself tempted in the shower, take cold (or at least lukewarm) showers. If you find yourself tempted by pornography, avoid using the internet when you are by yourself. Never just get on the internet and surf. Rather, only get on when you have something you need to do. Make a list before you access the internet of all the things you need to use it for, then once you are finished shut down the computer and don’t use it again. Especially avoid using the internet late at night. Unless its urgent, it can wait until the next day. If you look at pornography on your phone, then cancel your data plan, it’s not worth your soul!

Those are all just some basic pointers to get you started, but you should definitely seek the counsel of a priest. They will be able to help you far better!

Best of luck! I will say a prayer for you!
Click to expand...
👍 This was going to be my advice exactly! The only thing I would add- lots of sacramentals. I have my Our Lady of Fatima statue right next to my bed. It reminds me to be pure like Mary. 🙂
 
As you grow, you experience different parts of your body. So, in experiencing parts of your body you have found our what masturbation is.

If you feel like masturbating in bed, try and do some reading or exercizces.

Eventually this will go away; however if it does not dessimate, you should see a priest about it because contiuously masturbating percepts you mighht have a problem in this area.

But try reading, praying, AND TRY EXERCIZING.

As purported to you, if this becomes a habit then you should seek help from a priest.

It is not normal to masturbate daily.

God bless you now.

Brother Justin.OP
 
smichhertz said:
Hi clouded_coffee!

Firstly, WELCOME TO CAF! I hope you enjoy your experience with these forums, I have found them to be a great resource for my own spiritual journey.

In regards to your question, this is a very common problem for men. I highly recommend you get a spiritual director. Online resources and books can only do so much. At the very least, schedule an appointment with your local priest and ask him what he recommends.

If you can’t get a spiritual director, try to get in the habit of having a regular confessor. I’m not saying avoid going to confession to other priests, but pick one priest to be your regular confessor and try to go to him once a month. Each time you go, recollect ALL your sins from the last time you had confession with him (even the ones already confessed).

Since you are tempted more at night while you are in bed, be sure to excercise regularly during the day and eliminate or at least cut back on caffeine. Try to eat a lighter dinner as well. All of these things will help make you more tired at the end of the day and (hopefully) you’ll go right to sleep. In the morning, don’t allow yourself to stay in bed, the second you wake up, GET UP!
Click to expand...
I’m actually a woman, but this advice still helps. In fact, everybody’s advice really helps. Thank you all so so much! I really appreciate it. Hopefully I can abstain, especially since I’m getting ready to go to World Youth Day this summer 😃
 
clouded_coffee said:
I’m actually a woman, but this advice still helps. In fact, everybody’s advice really helps. Thank you all so so much! I really appreciate it. Hopefully I can abstain, especially since I’m getting ready to go to World Youth Day this summer 😃
Click to expand...
Ah…whoops. 😊 Please accept my humble apologies.

I hope you enjoy World Youth Day! I hear Madrid is beautiful. I only went once in Toronto, which was the last World Youth Day with JPII, and I had an amazing experience!

Feel free to reach out to CAF if you need any additional help!
 
I am a woman and also struggle with this issue. I find adoration takes about 80% of the desire away. The other thing I do is ask God to remove the desire, so far it works but I think about it a lot.

I agree with having one confessor. I have one priest I confess everything to and he knows my struggle in this area that way I can’t “snow job” a priest who doesn’t know me. I can say, “Yep I’m struggling again” and he gives me great advice.

I will pray for you and ask for your prayers for me as well. :gopray2:
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top