Masturbation website or book

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StephiePea:
No way. You cannot honestly say that someone who is a chronic masturbater doesn’t consent and make an active choice to do it. It isn’t like you are going to go through some harmful withdraws if you stop cold-turkey!
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Don’t take my word for it. Read what the catechism says about the subject:
…one must take into account the affective immaturity, force of acquired habit, conditions of anxiety or other psychological or social factors that lessen, if not even reduce to a minimum, moral culpability.
(Emphasis obviously added by me)
 
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Scout:
I think what Timidity is trying to say is that there comes a point at which that the addiction takes over and people stop thinking rationally and clearly. An alcoholic knows that he shouldn’t drink and all the consequences that come with it if he does, but the desire becomes so strong that the addiction takes over and the mind stops working rationally.

And not everything that is addictive has withdrawl symptoms. Some people are addicted to food, but don’t go through harmful side affects when they go on a diet-except for maybe hunger.

I just think everyone is different. Just because one person can stop something “cold turkey” doesn’t mean everyone can. I think we should just be open to the possibility that for some, masturbation may be an addiction.

Scout :tiphat:
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The difference here is that alcohol causes physical changes in the body and causes a dependence. The same with drugs and smoking. Sexual desires come from hormones and the need for procreation. Self-pleasure is the result of not having the self-control to not do it. And I’m not saying that the person is bad, or that we shouldn’t support the person and be conserned. But to make excuses and assume that someone is not responsible anymore because it has turned from a bad habit to an addiction is not reasonable. What does the church say on this matter? That alcoholism, drug use, and premarital sex is OK because the person is addicted?
 
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Timidity:
Don’t take my word for it. Read what the catechism says about the subject:
…one must take into account the affective immaturity, force of acquired habit, conditions of anxiety or other psychological or social factors that lessen, if not even reduce to a minimum, moral culpability.
(Emphasis obviously added by me)
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A good point. However, if one is aware of the habit and one’s predisposition, then one must (if at all possible) avoid those things that could make the person more likely to engage in the habit.

The chronic masturbator should avoid movies with sexual or sexually-suggestive themes, for example. In such cases it may not be sinful to engage in the act of masturbation, but it *would * be sinful to intentionally expose oneself to something that makes the act more likely to occur, and the act thereby occurs.
 
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StephiePea:
The difference here is that alcohol causes physical changes in the body and causes a dependence. The same with drugs and smoking. Sexual desires come from hormones and the need for procreation. Self-pleasure is the result of not having the self-control to not do it. And I’m not saying that the person is bad, or that we shouldn’t support the person and be conserned. But to make excuses and assume that someone is not responsible anymore because it has turned from a bad habit to an addiction is not reasonable. What does the church say on this matter? That alcoholism, drug use, and premarital sex is OK because the person is addicted?
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No one is saying that the act is OK just because the person may be addicted. Sexual desires come from hormones-which cause physical changes in the body. Orgasm causes physical changes in the body, and those changes may be addictive for some people. Just because it isn’t for you, doesn’t mean it isn’t for some others.

And I’m not saying that the person isn’t responsible in the sense that they need to admit the problem and seek help for it, just like an alcholic or smoker or drug user.

I’m just suggesting that we be open to the possibility that it is an addiction for some people. It doesn’t excuse the behavior. Just because a person is an alcoholic doesn’t excuse the fact that they got drunk one night and smashed their car into a tree. However, it does allow us to help those people with addictions to recover from them and stop doing the harmful behavior.

Scout :tiphat:
 
Ok, Scout…to shake hands and end on a friendly note, I looked up the word addiction in the Webster dictionary, and here we go

Addiction–A habit so strong that it cannot easily be broken; one with chemical or psychological dependency on a substance.

So we are both correct! Thanks for the discussion 🙂

God Bless.
 
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StephiePea:
Ok, Scout…to shake hands and end on a friendly note, I looked up the word addiction in the Webster dictionary, and here we go

Addiction–A habit so strong that it cannot easily be broken; one with chemical or psychological dependency on a substance.

So we are both correct! Thanks for the discussion 🙂

God Bless.
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Wow, looking up the word “addiction” was a great idea. I’d be happy to “virtually” shake hands with you…and Timidity, too. It was a great discussion.

Scout :tiphat:
 
Is there a need for such a website?

I am starting to writing php code for web sites, and I have a really simplistic BB system as a chapter exercise from a book. If there is enough interest, I will create a site for you to discuss these types of issues so you can carry it on outside of CA. It would be “plain vanilla” code, no smilies, no fancy features, probably no login or other security, etc. Just a place to post messages under the “honor system” at least as long as it doesn’t get taken over by weirdos or something. If it is abused I can delete posts, add logins or whatever, or worst case take it back down. Just reply to this post and/or send me PM. It would probably take about an hour to set up, if there are no difficulties; if there is enough interest I can probably have it up and running pretty quickly.

Alan
 
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Scout:
It was a great discussion.
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Agreed. It’s always great when people can discuss an issue through without becoming uncharitable! Great discussion all of you!
 
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Timidity:
. I’m very happy that you hadn’t developed an addiction, but not everyone is as blessed.
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I was totally addicted…this is a weird topic and I don’t need to go into detail…but daily…for years.

God will grace anyone who asks for help. It is an addiction, but not nearly as bad as drugs, etc. I mean you have bigtime withdrawls from drugs. and yes you have withdrawls from masterbation too, but just don’t put your hand in your pants!!! I mean if you really want to stop you will. Sleep in your grandma’s bed if you need to, don’t be left alone. Stop taking showers. I mean come on now, if you really cared about christ and want to love him and share in his kingdom, you could stop.
 
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swimstud:
I read in one thread that most people here are sick of helping people with this sin so all that I am asking is if you know of any websites or books that can help people trying to break the sin of masturbation.

I have heard time and time again that it is a mortal sin but need answers as to why. I even have a book saying that it could not be a mortal sin in some cases.

*Outlines of the Catholic Faith *
published by the leaflet missal company
Imprimatur bu Harry J. Flynn, D.D. - Archbishop of St. Paul and Minneapolis.
It is listed as a sin(mortal or venial I do not know): a. At least in some cases, the moral guilt associate with this sin is lessened by various factors.
b. The priest-confessor makes such an evaluation when the penitent confesses this sin.

Does this mean that the priest can decide if masturbation is mortal or venial under the circumstances?
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Masturbation - it is so liberating when with God’s grace you give up ‘choking the chicken’
 
Whether is is chemical, physical, addition, habit, whatever…Who cares!!! It can’t be that bad, I have NEVER heard of anyone who had to start taking medicinal drugs to stop masturbating!!! but yet we use drugs to stop smoking, drugs, etc.

Wear a chastity belt, you will be fine, well just dirty icky.

All I am saying is…if you truly love God, you WILL stop. Any addiction, habit, whatever you want to call it can be stopped, but first you need to WANT to. If you want to, you can do anything.

Oh yeah, one thing that helped for me…even you are going to, or if you started doing it…think about all the people in heaven watching you…grandma, Mary, St. Peter, Mother Teresa…just picture what Jesus and Mary are feeling when you do it…they are crying for you. That kinda kills the mood.
 
Seven Sorrows:
Whether is is chemical, physical, addition, habit, whatever…Who cares!!! It can’t be that bad, I have NEVER heard of anyone who had to start taking medicinal drugs to stop masturbating!!! but yet we use drugs to stop smoking, drugs, etc.

Wear a chastity belt, you will be fine, well just dirty icky.

All I am saying is…if you truly love God, you WILL stop. Any addiction, habit, whatever you want to call it can be stopped, but first you need to WANT to. If you want to, you can do anything.

Oh yeah, one thing that helped for me…even you are going to, or if you started doing it…think about all the people in heaven watching you…grandma, Mary, St. Peter, Mother Teresa…just picture what Jesus and Mary are feeling when you do it…they are crying for you. That kinda kills the mood.
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Someone who lives near me was in the middle of doing the evil deed when his Mum walked in.:eek: He didn’t hear her come in, he only knew she came in because there was a bowl of cookies and some milk when he looked round after finishing. On the note was written “This should help you get your strength back.” :o

Don’t ever do it because apart from losing sanctifying grace you could end up being found out
 
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AlanFromWichita:
Is there a need for such a website?

I am starting to writing php code for web sites, and I have a really simplistic BB system as a chapter exercise from a book. If there is enough interest, I will create a site for you to discuss these types of issues so you can carry it on outside of CA. It would be “plain vanilla” code, no smilies, no fancy features, probably no login or other security, etc. Just a place to post messages under the “honor system” at least as long as it doesn’t get taken over by weirdos or something. If it is abused I can delete posts, add logins or whatever, or worst case take it back down. Just reply to this post and/or send me PM. It would probably take about an hour to set up, if there are no difficulties; if there is enough interest I can probably have it up and running pretty quickly.

Alan
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I think a lot of people suffer from this sin. We have to be sensitive to those who seem unable to give up and indulge in this animal act
 
Personally speaking, I think the kitten picture we could have done without. That was just stupid. And I believe there are more appropriate ways of discussing the topic without referring it to the “chicken” statement. Let’s all pretend we’re adults and show a little class, please.

Scout :tiphat:
 
the kitten picture is the most hilarious thing i’ve seen today. thanks, i needed the laugh. 😃
 
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