I am seeing two misunderstandings in this thread:
First, people are trying to apply this particular priest’s advice to this particular person (a one-time incident) and make a general principle out of it. There
is no general principle, here - it was a one-time situation. Nobody reading along here should take that priest’s advice to that one person as if it were advice to themselves - and as I said in my first post on this thread, neither should the person who received the advice take it as general advice - it was a one-time situation.
Second, when someone said that the penitent must follow the priest’s direction, the priest’s direction was
not that she should receive Holy Communion, but rather, that she should return directly after Mass to make her Confession. He said that she “may” (not “must”) receive Holy Communion at the Mass, but he did not direct her to do so - what he directed her to do (the thing she had to obey him in) was to return to the Confessional directly after Mass and make her Confession at that time.
Third (and most importantly) we must trust our priests in these kinds of situations. It is only by trusting them that they become trustworthy. If we are in the habit of disobeying them and doing whatever seems right in our own eyes, they start saying outlandish things, because they don’t expect to be obeyed.
But if they see us obeying them (especially if we do some of the outlandish things they tell us to do), they sober up very quickly and start giving us good advice. It is, therefore, much healthier for the whole Body of Christ when we obey our appointed pastors.
I have personal experience with this; we had a priest who was not at all respected by his congregation, and one time he happened to be in charge of a Mass for my students. He told one of my students to go and run around in the Church. I don’t know what led up to him saying this to the student, but the student came to me, laughing, and said, “Guess what Father told me to do!” I said, “Well, you know, you must do it, since Father has told you to do it,” and I made him run around the Church. Father came in, horrified, and I said, “How many times around did you want him to do, Father?” He said, “Oh - uh - he can stop now,” so I went over and I told the student, “Father says you can stop now!”
Anyway, the rest of the day, Father was very sober and dignified, and asked the children very politely to do some necessary things, and they obeyed him in everything, and he said it was the nicest children’s Mass he had ever presided over.
