MEN What do you find Immodest

[VociMike]

you don’t want to create a thin line between Islam and Christianity???

No, let’s keep the line as thick as possible. All women are tgo go around naked and have sex with any man who snaps his fingers. That’s the only possible alternative, right?

Or might there be some middle ground on the issue that doesn’t turn us all into Taliban?

 

[KathleenElsie]

This is a great thread! Sometimes women assume that to not arouse men that they must be unattractive and therefore you see Christian women dressing dumpy. But most of the things that guys have written about are pretty easy to avoid and most women find these styles repulsive also.

This has been the point of this thread. I love to dress up in frilly, fancy blouses and wonderful skirts. I collect antique cameos and wear them also. Old fashioned, yes. Classy, yes. For everyone, No.

Dumpy is just as immodest as a burka. Both ways of dress ask the man to use his imagination as to what is being hidden under them.

 

[Sailboat]

Kathleen, I don’t think that’s correct of you to critisize women for not dressing fashionably. There’s nothing immodest about wearing unfashionable ‘dumpy’ clothes. For instance a woman wearing old sweats and an old shirt isn’t really a turn on to me. Also, burkas closly resemble the habits of nuns, so I don’t think it’s nice of you to critisize them. I wish I still saw nuns dressed that way, I liked it when I was a boy.

 

[Sailboat]

After all, the virgin mary wore a headcovering very similar to what you see in the middle east and in India today. I think they are nice. They aren’t our custom in the west but that’s okay too. I don’t see anything terrrible about them.

 

[KathleenElsie]

Kathleen, I don’t think that’s correct of you to criticize women for not dressing fashionably. There’s nothing immodest about wearing unfashionable ‘dumpy’ clothes. For instance a woman wearing old sweats and an old shirt isn’t really a turn on to me. Also, burkas closely resemble the habits of nuns, so I don’t think it’s nice of you to criticize them. I wish I still saw nuns dressed that way, I liked it when I was a boy.

I think you took what I said wrongly. I said that if the form of dress was to make someone notice you it then becomes immodest.

It is the intention behind the clothing that at times makes them immodest.

I love to see our nuns in habits. Infact it makes me sad to see a nun in street clothing. But even a habit can be done wrongly if it is done with pride and a “look at me” intention.

 

[KathleenElsie]

My daughter and I wear long skirts and head coverings to Mass and when praying. I wear my “dumpy” clothing because I feel called upon to dress modestly. In public while shopping we wear jumpers or skirts and long sleeved blouses. Not is style to say the least.

But, as stated in my other post it is not “in your face” and do as we do. It is the “in your face” and “my way is the only way” that the modest “dumpy” clothing becomes immodest.

 

[Sailboat]

Oh, I see what you’re saying, Kathleen. You’re talking about that grungy style of having your hair in disarray, dumpy, frumpy clothes, maybe red henna or hair dyed black, with horrible black nail polish, and looking like a druggie, with weird piercings and/or tatoos?

 

[Reformed_Rob]

Both ways of dress ask the man to use his imagination as to what is being hidden under them.

Kathleen,

I know what you mean, so I’m not disagreeing and suggesting wearing less or tighter fitting clothes. That’s my disclaimer!

But…sometimes our imagination is precisely what needs restraining. So along the lines of what you’re getting at, the nice clothes like you and other modest-minded women wear often help to keep our imagination from running wild.

For instance, I really feel uncomfortable sometimes, in public especially, merely looking at a woman/girl that is dressed immodestly. Because people might think “look, he’s checking her out!” But women dressed nice, I can look (not stare) and not feel like I’m under the gun.

 

[wcknight]

At my age, anything short of a full length burqua is a turn on…

No, I think women already know what is provocative and immodest, plunging necklines, bare back, too much thigh or mid rift, just about any cleavage is too much…

this just shows you how much of a Puritan I’ve become… in my younger days, I would have been searching for this stuff…

 

[fiat1122]

At my age, anything short of a full length burqua is a turn on…

No, I think women already know what is provocative and immodest, plunging necklines, bare back, too much thigh or mid rift, just about any cleavage is too much…

this just shows you how much of a Puritan I’ve become… in my younger days, I would have been searching for this stuff…

I prefer to see the modesty of women in stockings and a garter belt. JUST KIDDING EVERYONE

 

[fiat1122]

I prefer to see the modesty of women in stockings and a garter belt. JUST KIDDING EVERYONE

 

[Hastrman]

Frankly, other than thongs sticking out and those shirts that are really just a mini-apron, I can’t think of any clothing I find immodest that wouldnt get its wearer arrested. But then, I seem to be one of the few people who knows that being attractive and sexy is a good thing.

Maybe I watch too much anime, but I actually find the outfit worn by Shinto shrine maidens–originally something like Vestal virgins but now usually just the daughters of families who run shrines–to be very sexy, as is the feminine form of the Korean hanbok…and that basically conceals the entire body below the armpits. The thing is, it’s not sexy in an immodest way, it’s sexy in a chaste way.

That’s a little vague, so I’ll clarify. Proper sexiness says, essentially, “Why, yes, all other things being equal, sex with me would be rather nice.” Immodesty, which actually isn’t all that sexy, rubs your face in the idea of sex, and actually makes it a little boring.

A little sexual attraction, even a slight stirring of desire, is a good thing, and anyone who finds that an occasion of sin has to understand that that’s his problem. I occasionally feel that way, but I know that’s an excessive feeling. The rest of the time, just enjoy the beauty! We’re designed to process how other humans look, more than almost any other sensory (name removed by moderator)ut, so we should enjoy every bit of beauty our species has to offer. And I mean all of it. I’m straight, but I enjoy masculine beauty almost as much as feminine–it doesn’t make me feel at all the same way (there’s no sexual component), but I do like it when everyone looks good, not just the girls.

I believe that’s called “being secure in one’s masculinity”.

 

[Magnanimity]

I would have to agree with 95% (at least) of what other men have said above, in regards to just what are some of the specifics of immodesty they see in dress, and how it makes them feel in the moment. So, ditto to much that has already been said.

One specific thing though that gets me every time, that I didn’t see mentioned above, would be seeing a woman wearing very tight, thin pants and wearing a thong underneath because the material outline of the thong is actually (and fairly easily) visible through the material of the pants. Do you understand what I’m describing? I’m not talking about seeing the underwear rise up above the pantline (waistline). I’m talking about seeing that a woman (or a teenager!) is wearing a thong without actually seeing the underwear itself. For some reason, the material on some tights pants today is so thin that the seam-material of the underwear beneath actually pushes up through the backside material of the thin pants. So, one sees the outline of the thong through the thin material of the pants without ever actually seeing the underwear exposed.

So much of eroticism for men consists in the suggestive (and not the actual display, though the actual display is tough too). And I cannot help finding it very erotic that a woman is, in a way, displaying the fact that she is wearing a thong to anyone standing behind and casually looking. Seriously, I feel like I see this phenomenon often, even at Mass. To me, it is more erotic (and therefore more difficult for me to handle) for the fact of a thong to be displayed, more so than seeing the actual underwear rise above the top of the pants. This would be equivalent to a young woman wearing a tight shirt with no bra underneath being more exciting than her wearing a tight shirt with a bra underneath, whether that bra is exposed or unexposed.

Also, of course, so much of it consists in the attitude, as others have said above. If I see a woman wearing what I describe above with a “am I not just drop dead gorgeous, and don’t you wish you could…?” attitude, then it’s all infinitely much worse.