MERGED: Confessing Horrible Sins/First time confession/Absolved

[Liraco]

@Katrin: you’re almost there! Hang in there. I’ll be praying for you.

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I have done so many other things too terrible to list here.

All God wants is for you to seek forgiveness and it WILL be given to you.

A few years ago I started feeling the call to return to christianity but failed three times… I now know that I’m being called back to catholicism.

Reminds me of this guy called Simon, later known as Peter who also stumbled 3 times VERY badly, though it turned out well in the end.

There are many obstacles. My two youngest children have autism and there’s no way I can bring them to mass. If I miss mass I’m sinning and if I bring them their constant (noise) echolating and inability to sit still will make it impossible for anyone else to enjoy the service. I have no doubt we will not be welcome back, as there are some very severe behavioral issues here, which we are constantly working to overcome.

If you have a good reason not to go then it’s not a sin. It’s a sin if you’d willfully choose not to go.

Let’s suppose you found a chance to go to Church on Sunday at 8 am but thought to yourself “it’s too early, I don’t wanna go!”, then it would seem you had your chance and chose not to take it. That would be objectively sinful. On the other hand if you couldn’t leave your home because you had to stay and take care of the kids and had no way to attend, then you’re not willingly avoiding mass.

I would highly recommend if you found a chance to go speak to the priest at your local Church. Perhaps they know of similar cases and a solution, not just for this but your other problems as well. You won’t know till you ask.

Have faith that God will open the way for you, even if it takes a bit more effort that one would like.

God is patient and will wait for me. I hope so, because he’ll have to be very patient indeed. …* hope that it is not too late (or won’t be later) if things ever stabilize to the point that I can attempt to mend my relationship with God and return to the church.*
While your heart still beats it’s not too late! A day is like 1000 years and 1000 years are like a day to Him. You needn’t worry about His patience, but pray for your own.
He’s brought you this far and though you may not see it, you’re already starting to mend that relationship by that fact that you’re praying and seeking Him.
LaceButterfly;7697941:

When I look back I’m pretty disgusted with myself.

That’s the accuser speaking, making you feel worthless and not deserving love. Remember he’s a liar though.

You know what one of the things read this Sunday was? Romans 5:8
But God proves his love for us
in that while we were still sinners Christ died for us.

So I repeat it to you, dear sister: God loves you, and there’s nothing you can do about it!

I’ll be praying for you, and if you need anything else, just ask. God bless you.

 

[odile53]

Just find a church and make an appointment with the priest. Priests have heard it all in the confessional, and can give you some good guidance, much better than you can get off an internet site. If you are concerned about the cost of an annulment, check out your diocesan website and click on the link to the marriage tribunal. They usually have attendant fees listed there, and most will either agree to take payments or even waive the fees if you can demonstrate financial need. There are some dioceses that will do an annulment investigation for nothing, it’s underwritten by the diocese. You might be really fortunate in living in one of those dioceses and not even realize it unless you investigate.

If you are feeling drawn back to the Church, that is the voice of the Holy Spirit. The obstacles you mention are not insurmountable. You don’t have to attend Mass as a family, you can split child-watching chores with your husband so that you can go. Everything else can be disposed of in Reconciliation, and taking a refresher RCIA course would help you feel more a part of the Church.

Don’t overthink this one. Just follow your leading.

My prayers are with you.

 

[504Katrin]

@Katrin: you’re almost there! Hang in there. I’ll be praying for you.

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awe! thank you so much for your prayers, Liraco!

The church called me back and I have an appointment for confession tomorrow night. I’m so excited. This Sunday I will finally be able to receive communion :heaven:

 

[TheAnonymouse]

How can I have the courage to confess a really disgusting, embarrassing sin - namely, bestiality. I’m so ashamed and I don’t know how I can possibly say it in confession

 

[Incomplete]

By remembering that you are not the first to confess it. And remember that without confession, you should not be receiving communion.

Most importantly, by remembering that this sin separates you from God. How good to be back close to Him!

 

[baltobetsy]

How can I have the courage to confess a really disgusting, embarrassing sin - namely, bestiality. I’m so ashamed and I don’t know how I can possibly say it in confession

The same way you just said it to us. Go behind the screen, ask the Holy Spirit, the Blessed Virgin and your guardian angel to help you, and just say it. The relief you will feel is in direct proportion to the fear you feel now.

 

[504Katrin]

How can I have the courage to confess a really disgusting, embarrassing sin - namely, bestiality. I’m so ashamed and I don’t know how I can possibly say it in confession

Having read this thread I believe it’s nothing unusual that we’re embarrassed by our own sins. I will have to sit eye to eye with the priest who’s celebrating mass each Sunday . Like others have already said tho they’ve probably heard it all before, and they are prepared for everything I suppose. Nothing comes easy and if you weren’t a bit embarrassed by your sins but went to confession rather light hearted you wouldn’t take it seriously enough maybe, so imo feeling the way we feel is part of our repentance and part of going to confession. Wish you all the best. Maybe read this entire thread once more might help you. I was too afraid to even seriously consider confession and now I’m even looking forward to it.

Also don’t forget that the devil hates it when we go to confession. So as long as you don’t confess you’re an even better target for the devil and temptation might be around even more often, so going to confession should only help you to live a better life

 

[odile53]

Well, you were able to “confess” it here on an internet forum, where someone might be able to get your ISP address. In the confessional, the priest is bound by absolute secrecy. Someone could confess to serial murder and he couldn’t go to the authorities about it on pain of excommunication (he probably would try to talk the killer into turning himself in, however.) If you could post a sin on an internet forum, why not tell it to God and the priest, who aren’t going to go blabbing it about?

 

[Chrismacmax]

I have never heard of anyone locking the confession door behind them…at all.
I have never , ever seen a confessional with a lock.
Something smells fishy.

 

[Liraco]

How can I have the courage to confess a really disgusting, embarrassing sin - namely, bestiality. I’m so ashamed and I don’t know how I can possibly say it in confession

Prayer. With God’s grace you can do it, but if you rely on yourself then you will fail. If you feel ashamed then your repentance is clear, but now you mustn’t let fear keep you from God.

If you love Him and want His forgiveness, then** keep your eyes on Him**.

Remember Peter walking on the ocean toward Jesus. He did pretty well until he took his eyes off Him.

Matthew 14:29-31
Peter said to him in reply, “Lord, if it is you, command me to come to you on the water.”
He said, “Come.” Peter got out of the boat and began to walk on the water toward Jesus.
But when he saw how (strong) the wind was he became frightened; and, beginning to sink, he cried out, “Lord, save me!”
Immediately Jesus stretched out his hand and caught him, and said to him, “O you of little faith, why did you doubt?”

Have faith, pray for that courage and get right with God again. He’s waiting for you, and the proof is in the fact that you’re here and reading this, that you came on this forum seeking Him. So go! This is exactly the time of repentance and conversion back to Him.

God bless you.

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I have never heard of anyone locking the confession door behind them…at all.
I have never , ever seen a confessional with a lock.
Something smells fishy.

I wonder what’s “fishy” to you. Perhaps it’s the lenten menu? rimshot

The confessional in my parish has a regular doorknob, you could lock it if you wanted but most people barely even bother to shut the door properly. It’s you and God, and the rest of the world is irrelevant at that moment. At least that seems to be the case here.

 

[504Katrin]

just want to give feedback as everyone who contributed in this thread helped me so greatly.
My confession was great and I feel so much better now. I told the priest that imo my biggest sin of all was that I didn’t listen to what Jesus wanted me to do so felt like I kind of betrayed Him. Had I listened in the first place I would not have sinned, so it was stupid to believe that I knew better than Him and that I could have lived without His guidance .
The priest helped because he reminded me that Jesus was betrayed also and later even built his entire church on him so I should trust in His forgiveness.
I’m still having a kind of bad conscience because of that, but it also keeps me from committing the same sin again, as I never want to dismiss Jesus’ advice ever again

 

[Incomplete]

Thank you for letting us know. I’m so glad you did the right thing. Isn’t confession just the greatest thing?

 

[504Katrin]

Thank you for letting us know. I’m so glad you did the right thing. Isn’t confession just the greatest thing?

Yes it is! Thanks for the kind words Incomplete
I felt kind of newborn after communion on Sunday.

I can only recommend anyone who’s reading this thread and struggling with the decision to not hesitate any longer. Our Lord is already waiting for you :yup:

 

[A_Penitent]

Dear friends,

I was in church today, sitting and trying to find the courage to go confess my sins… I didn’t make it. I went to confession months ago, but I only found the strength to confess some of my faults. I feel like my sins are horrible and very serious.
Maybe the priest has heard it all before, but still…
Some of my sins go way back and I think about them daily. I was never really able to confess them to anyone. Only God knows…
I don’t think I can forgive myself. I’ve been carrying this guilt for very long now.
Last Sunday at mass, I wept when people were receiving communion. I wish I could sit at our Lord’s Table…

Please, pray for me.

 

[Incomplete]

Dear friends,

I was in church today, sitting and trying to find the courage to go confess my sins… I didn’t make it. I went to confession months ago, but I only found the strength to confess some of my faults. I feel like my sins are horrible and very serious.
Maybe the priest has heard it all before, but still…
Some of my sins go way back and I think about them daily. I was never really able to confess them to anyone. Only God knows…
I don’t think I can forgive myself. I’ve been carrying this guilt for very long now.
Last Sunday at mass, I wept when people were receiving communion. I wish I could sit at our Lord’s Table…

Please, pray for me.

I feel so badly for you.

Our Lord wants a humble and contrite heart, which you so clearly have. And He loves you so completely. I will pray that you find a compassionate priest who will help you through this.

 

[Incomplete]

Yes it is! Thanks for the kind words Incomplete
I felt kind of newborn after communion on Sunday.

I can only recommend anyone who’s reading this thread and struggling with the decision to not hesitate any longer. Our Lord is already waiting for you :yup:

You’re welcome, Katrin. You made my day.

 

[maryj]

Dear friends,

I was in church today, sitting and trying to find the courage to go confess my sins… I didn’t make it. I went to confession months ago, but I only found the strength to confess some of my faults. I feel like my sins are horrible and very serious.
Maybe the priest has heard it all before, but still…
Some of my sins go way back and I think about them daily. I was never really able to confess them to anyone. Only God knows…
I don’t think I can forgive myself. I’ve been carrying this guilt for very long now.
Last Sunday at mass, I wept when people were receiving communion. I wish I could sit at our Lord’s Table…

Please, pray for me.

Don’t you know the whole church is praying for you. We ask the Holy Spirit to give you courage. What could be worse than what you are feeling every day because of your guilt. My favorite line that our priest says is this…I’m a lion at the pulpit and a lamb in the confessional. Coincidence that I just left a holy hour in Adoration and prayed for those struggling to get into a confessional and then I come home and log on to catholic answers and the first post I read is yours?..no coincidence here. KNOW that Jesus is calling you, hear Him, believe in His mercy. He loves you even in yoour sin…Go to him. You will be in my prayers. God Bless you.

 

[A_Penitent]

Don’t you know the whole church is praying for you. We ask the Holy Spirit to give you courage. What could be worse than what you are feeling every day because of your guilt. My favorite line that our priest says is this…I’m a lion at the pulpit and a lamb in the confessional. Coincidence that I just left a holy hour in Adoration and prayed for those struggling to get into a confessional and then I come home and log on to catholic answers and the first post I read is yours?..no coincidence here. KNOW that Jesus is calling you, hear Him, believe in His mercy. He loves you even in yoour sin…Go to him. You will be in my prayers. God Bless you.

Thank you for your prayers and for your kind words, maryj!

I am feeling a bit closer to experience the Lord’s infinite mercy each day. Baby steps…

God bless you.

 

[Liraco]

Baby steps indeed. Remember Peter when he walked on water toward Jesus. All was fine till he tooks his eyes off Him. So keep yours on Him and don’t look back.

I was in church today, sitting and trying to find the courage to go confess my sins… I didn’t make it. I went to confession months ago, but I only found the strength to confess some of my faults. I feel like my sins are horrible and very serious.
Maybe the priest has heard it all before, but still…
Some of my sins go way back and I think about them daily. I was never really able to confess them to anyone. Only God knows…

If you feel they’re horrible and serious then you’re on the right track in one sense (as opposed to “it’s not so bad, I don’t have to confess anything”).

Now just remember that when you go to confession it’s Jesus who absolves you through His minister, the priest. So when you go to confession, remember Who you’re confessing to.

I don’t think I can forgive myself. I’ve been carrying this guilt for very long now.

“My yoke is easy and my burden light”. Jesus wants to make us free from that heavy burden of sin. Ask the Holy Spirit to help you to confession so that you can be forgiven. Make your peace with Him first, THEN you’ll be able to work on making peace with yourself. Remember He comes first, not our feeling of guilt.

Last Sunday at mass, I wept when people were receiving communion. I wish I could sit at our Lord’s Table…

If you’re reading this then it means He’s still waiting for you to come. All you need is to wash up to be ready for the banquet.

Please, pray for me.

Meditate on our Lord’s passion. Remember what He suffered and did for YOU (yes, you personally, you a sinner like me, you a lost sheep whom He wants back in the fold, you a child of God).

Meditate on Romans 5:8
But God proves his love for us in that while we were still sinners Christ died for us.

So you do that, while I pray for you.

 

[504Katrin]

If you’re reading this then it means He’s still waiting for you to come.

hahaha :yup: