MERGED: Terror of confession./Nervous

[egnubo]

I suggest making an appointment with a priest, instead of going in a confessional at regularly scheduled time. Because of a bad experience in the confessional when I was a child I would panic when going into a confessions. I find meeting with the priest in his office is much more comfortable. Start just by speaking to him, letting him know what you have said here. I too would only go once a year and be in a panic. I made an appointment with a priest who was close with just to talk. This led, very informally, into the celebration of the Sacrament of Reconciliation. Eventually he became my spiritual director and he was very gentle with my fears and eventually I started going to confession more often even though I had no mortal sins. Now I go about every 6 weeks, when I schedule my hair coloring appointment it is my reminder to make an appointment for confession. I still go in his office. Once in awhile I will go to a different priest in a confessional but I prefer not to since it still bothers me.

This is useful, practical and doable. I hope you did it filios

 

[bmonk]

I made that sound a bit more exaggerated than what i meant. I mean that i tend to feel sad guilty every time I make a mistake or sin the same sin that i am trying to stop.

Part of it is that I have been battling myself with the idea that I am not perfect and that I am not like everyone else and that i can’t do everything that they do too. And part of that is my depression makes my fears and worries more prominent.

Bring this deeper realization to your confessor. Many people struggle with the burden of scruples or perfectionism. Many grow weary confessing and then committing the same sin over and over again.

God loves us anyway. The gospel today (Mt 18:21 - 19:1) has Peter ask Jesus how often we should forgive our brother, as many as seven times when he asks? Jesus responds, “Not seven, but seventy seven times.” If we are to forgive seventy seven times–plus a few more, since who can keep track that precisely?–God will surely forgive a repentant sinner as often as we repent and ask mercy.

 

[DevotedChild]

Bring this deeper realization to your confessor. Many people struggle with the burden of scruples or perfectionism. Many grow weary confessing and then committing the same sin over and over again.

God loves us anyway. The gospel today (Mt 18:21 - 19:1) has Peter ask Jesus how often we should forgive our brother, as many as seven times when he asks? Jesus responds, “Not seven, but seventy seven times.” If we are to forgive seventy seven times–plus a few more, since who can keep track that precisely?–God will surely forgive a repentant sinner as often as we repent and ask mercy.

Thanks.

 

[LTJR]

When I was reading you post it reminded me of some of my struggles with confession and they seem similar in a few ways to what you describe. I have read quite a few posts about people who have different fears when it comes to confession, some are more petrified then others because of the emotions they carry when it comes to the sacrament itself. Confession is not easy most priest will be willing to agree here that some people dont go enough because of what they experience and the time period from when they stopped going to when they finally came back.

Personally I have emotions with the sacrament and while I cant explain where they come from I know confession effects me, but I also know my heart as well does God. I think if anything some events of the church from the past have a percentage of influence to the number of people that go to confession, for me it is completely different because I come from another faith and it is more of an adaptation for me.

Recently I discovered some underlying fears that were connected and might be the reason why I am holding back even more from going.

Some people dont go again because they have had a bad experience where a priest did or said something that was out of the way, it can make a person feel more vulnerable.

If I could I would suggest you talk to your priest about your fears and see if can help you figure out why you are so terrified. if there is an issue already talk to him about that issue. He may refer you to another priest if he cant help. I would do it outside the confessional so you have more one on one time with him.

 

[Bookcat]

Are you on good terms with a particular priest? If so, ask him if you and he could have some private time for a talk. He, most likely, can help you understand more about what’s happening to you. Any priest should be able to offer you some help, but a friend can put you at ease sooner. Maybe that is the atmosphere in which you would be comfortable going to confession. Good luck and God bless.

 

[LTJR]

 K8-

Me included, lots of Catholics get nervous before a confession, it is not easy to do. Sometimes it is best to take some extra measures to make it a better experience. Nervousness is nothing compared to how I sweat before confession, during and after, I even blush, It shows God how you feel about him. being contrite is really important in confession. we all express emotions that seem awkward and sometimes it is hard to explain what we feel without feeling somewhat intimidated that it is not normal at all.

 

[Incomplete]

I would suggest, like others, to talk to your priest. But don’t just talk about your fear of confession; ask your priest about spiritual direction. If he becomes your spiritual director, you can start working out issues that way and let him lead you to confession as the time is right.