Mildly autistic? such a thing?

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raphaela

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My mom just let me know that during my therapy as a child (i went for 4 years), I was there because I was mildly autistic, but no one ever told me this. She explained the reasons why they thought this, and some of them hold very true today, my behaviors and such that I have tried to improve upon but can’t. She told me they never put me on medication because it wasnt severe and that the reason it was caused was my biological mother’s drug use (which has been to blame for many of my and my sisters health problems).

Is this real? Do any of you with autistic children know this. Is it possible to have varying degrees of autism? I didn’t think one could be mildly autistic, but know that I think about it, when i described certain things one night to my fiance’s aunt (who has worked extensively with special ed children), she told me this exact thing. So could I be mildly autistic??
Should I be mad that my mom hasn’t told me this until now???
Much help would be greatly appreciated because if it is true then soooooo much would make sense to me now.
 
Hi Rahaela, while I am not super knowledgable, I do know several families with autistic kids and the kids are definitely varied in the degree of severity. So, I do think mildly autistic is possible. I believe Autism is referred to as a whole spectrum of disorders and parents will say the child is ‘on the spectrum,’ which may mean a whole array of things. I think you can classify Asperger’s, PDD, Autism, as all on the spectrum. I’m sure someone else will have better info.

As for being upset at your Mom, I don’t know. Did she say why she didn’t say before? I would assume that she didn’t have any bad intentions, but I can understand your frustration right now.

God Bless, Nicole
 
hi raphaela

first–relax!! 🙂 based on the posts i’ve read from you, it seems that you appear to be a fully functioning adult with every ability to communicate.

autism is considered a spectrum disorder, falling underneath “Pervasive Developmental Disorder,” or “PDD” as it’s usually termed. because it’s a spectrum disorder, few children are “textbook cases” and may have a variety of symptoms or indicators. autism is considered a behavioral and communicative disorder for which there is no known cause–there are only THEORIES. (in other words, don’t blame your biological mom–there is probably a huge chance that her drug use inhibited your development, but not all drug babies become autistic.) it sounds like you may have experienced some developmental delays and perhaps had repetitive behaviors, lack of appropriate communication/relating to others and some sensori-motor issues? just guessing, but those are some commonly shared indications of children with this diagnosis.

however, the children i know and have worked with that have any sort of PDD (autism or spectrum) diagnosis have therapy for YEARS. not just four years, but they go through early intervention, intermediate intervention and school year intervention, often until age 21. and they aren’t “cured” at age 21, it’s simply when public services stop. furthermore, your primary educators (public or private schools) would have been legally obligated to provide you with a special education program. did you have an IEP (individualized education plan) as a child?

i’m just guessing, but it sounds like maybe you were mis-diagnosed? this DOES happen, and frequently. sometimes a child has several indications and seems very delayed for their age. but they are the ones who get “better” and who ultimately show very little indication of their earlier behavior/communication/sensory issues. there is no “cure” for autism–though many people argue about this.

here are some websites you can check out:

canfoundation.org
autism-pdd.net
autism.com
autism-resources.com
autism-society.com
autism.org

i can understand how upsetting it is to find something out about yourself that carries potentially upsetting consequences, but please don’t forget all that you have accomplished and done well. i think, from reading, that you are a student? supporting yourself? doing well in life? those are all good things–and things that many autistic adults can NOT do for themselves.
 
Remember that autistic usually refers to withdrawn from the world and into oneself. This can happen in many different ways and degrees.

Sometimes they are physical causes, such as hyper senses, senses that pick up external stimuli in a much greater extent that usual, and thus forces the individual away from others to handle the overload and in some cases the physical pain.

Some autism can be trained out and many youngsters, particularly if raised in a very protective environment may experience it for a period while adjusting to the barrage of stimuli in a less protective environment.
 
technical advice and websites above are great. yes, there are degrees and types of autism, and many disorders or behaviors that would not have been recognized 2o or so years ago are now classified as autism. Perhaps you mother did not want to label you, did not want you or your family to treat you as handicapped or disordered. Perhaps she did not want such a label to be used to place limits on your achievement or self-image, or to be used as an excuse.
 
Thank you so much Stobie!! I can tell you without knowing much about autism that I do have sensory problems, not problems but they drive me crazy. For instance, when I’m doing anything that requires concentration, i cannot have anything touching me at all. I have to wear a tanktop because I can’t wear sleeves. If the sleeves touch me i get frustrated. I’ve tried to do homework wearing a sweater and I drove myself nuts and got really mad and couldn’t calm myself down until I took it off. It was hard. There are certain noises that I can’t hear or it does the same thing. i was never really socialized as a child. I can communicate quite clearly on the internet or in writing, but when it comes to speaking, I start to stutter and can’t talk to people.

Apparently my therpay ended because i moved to a small town 2 hours away. I think I kept going once a month until I was 10 or 11, so a total of 6 years. I wasn’t in therapy for the first 4 years of my life because I had not been taken into custody of Childrens’ Aid yet.

As for school, I remember having to go to a class once a day to get extra help, even though my grades were fine. I didn’t have a EA with me all the time like other kids, but i still had to go to a class with them once a day…don’t know why.
I remember in 5th grade trying to get into the advanced math and english because I was bored with my work and my grades were as high as the rest of the kids…but they wouldn’t let me. They said that I wouldn’t be able to handle it and that was all they would tell me.
In highschool there was this program where they send gifted students to a university for a week. My grades were as high as the students being sent but when i talked to the teacher about it, she said I wasn’t gifted. I asked her what qualified as gifted and she said good grades. I tried to convince her that my grades were high enough, but she wouldn’t let me go. The teachers voted for who should go. I mean I got 99% in my math class, higher then the students that were going. So I never understood this.

Is it possible that if I was mildy autistic (though i do think it was a mis-diagnosis), that it woudl be on all my school records and therefore, that is why I was unable to do things I was more than capable of doing?? there are so many questions in my childhood that I want answered, and these were high on my list!!
 
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raphaela:
Is it possible that if I was mildy autistic (though i do think it was a mis-diagnosis), that it woudl be on all my school records and therefore, that is why I was unable to do things I was more than capable of doing?? there are so many questions in my childhood that I want answered, and these were high on my list!!
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I think it is possible that you might have had a temporary mild autism as a defensive mechanism of your brain to sensory overload. It probably would not be on most or even all records. I would look at the causes and not worry about the terms.

I suffer from hyper senses. My parishes I cannot attend due to the volume of the voice amplification system (microphone to speakers) and discordant high frequency harmonics (such as found in most Rock music) adversely affect me. My eyes are over senstive to sudden changes in light. (I am equally functional in dim light to bright light, but differences in luminousity get to me.) The hyper senses had lead to other things, some of which I can control and overcome, such as my initial avoidance of most people).
 
hmmmm…maybe that could be it. I don’t know…this whole thing has gotten confusing to me. Temporary autism?? Never heard of that before…I’ll have to look it up.

Touch is high on the bad side for me. When I’m nto doing anything, touch is fine. when i am, I get so mad, it really hurts my fiance when I’m doing homework and he hugs me and I start freaking out. Would you recommend me going back into therapy? or at least getting tested? Or should i leave it all behind me? Wow…so much confusion.
 
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raphaela:
hmmmm…maybe that could be it. I don’t know…this whole thing has gotten confusing to me. Temporary autism?? Never heard of that before…I’ll have to look it up.

Touch is high on the bad side for me. When I’m nto doing anything, touch is fine. when i am, I get so mad, it really hurts my fiance when I’m doing homework and he hugs me and I start freaking out. Would you recommend me going back into therapy? or at least getting tested? Or should i leave it all behind me? Wow…so much confusion.
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If you look at the definition of autism (I have seen other definitions that do not even include it as a disorder. This is a more clinical definition) and note the key word “variable” and consider that in its fully context, mild autism could be applied to almost anyone who has difficulty in social interacting at a young age. Someone who has autistic tendencies can work on them and overcome them.

Clinic Autism probably has stricter definitions that they use to classify someone as autistic.

Sometimes it is genetic, sometimes it is environmental, and it takes many many different forms. I saw a movie (based on a true story) on Lifetime this week about autistic twins with very different forms of it and how they worked to overcome it.

I am not sure what testing they have for hyper senses these days (I have had to learn to live with it on my own though I did get a doctor’s note excusing me from Prep Rallies in High School as they were determental to my health).

Try to understand why you interact with people and your environment the way you do. Acknowledge where your physical limitations are (for instance, my limit to the volume of sounds around me) and apply those to your interactions and work on those areas where your defense mechanism is overinterferring, accept those where it is necessary, including explaining it to those around you the best you can.

If you go to therapy (and I do not know if it would help or not), make sure you are working with those who understand the root causes of why you interact the way you do. Otherwise, they are just blowing in the wind. One size fits all solutions fail too often.
 
I suspect that my nephew may be mildly autistic, though he is a highly intelligent child. He has been diagnosed with Central Auditory Processing Disorder (CAPD). He is adopted also, and perhaps his mother did drugs as well.

I wouldn’t be too upset with your mom. I’m sure that she did the best she could for you, and perhaps not telling you about possibly being mildly autistic saved you a lot of grief while growing up ~ in terms of low self esteem, not striving to do your best because of thinking yourself not capable due to autism, or what have you. Sometimes kids need a lot of support and encouragement, and don’t need to have their shortcomings pointed out to them. You might ask yourself, what good would it have done for you as a youth, to have known this?

Yes, perhaps your school records had you labelled as “learning disabled.” I wouldn’t know. But that might be an excuse for not being sent into more advanced studies. Still, your teachers should have known you and your abilities by your work, and not some dumb label.

Even now, don’t let these labels get you down. We all have our limitations, but God sees us through our difficulties. “I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me.” (Philippians 4:13)
 
Yes there definately is. My next door neighbors are like my family. They have a 5 year old autistic son named David. He is mild. If you observed several different autistic children you will become aware that there are different degrees of severity. He does speak and understand, just on a lower level than the rest of his age group. Hes happy, makes eye contact, likes to cuddle and be around people. Severely autistic kids often dont speak, dont appear to understand (although many do), and hate any social contact, refusing to meet peoples eyes or be hugged or anything. You must be very mild as autism is not something you grow out of…if you were mildly autistic as achild u still are you just were so mild that all you probably needed was some special attention in certain areas to get rid of some of your autistic behaviors and bring you up to ‘normal’ level.
 
your mother’s drug use caused your autism? I didnt know that was possible. No one knows the causes, though it can be hereditary and parents with one autistic child, if they have another baby, its likely that one will be autistic also. Some people have the vaccination theory, but thats unlikely. But I think autism just happens sometime, maybe the drug use made you more prone to it but I didnt think that could cause autism. I may be wrong.
 
as an fyi–children with autism are rarely mentally retarded. they have average or ABOVE AVERAGE intelligence. it is their lack of being able to appropriately communicate and their behavioral patterns that make them, usually, very difficult to teach–though they are completely capable of learning.

furthremore, sensory issues are common. if you want to go into therapy for these issues, contact an occupational therapist. there are often clinics in the majority of cities, as well as university students who are willing and ready to work with you as they complete their therapy practicum/training cirriculum. get a referral from your primary doctor.

occupational therapists (called OTs) offer a variety of programs that they tailor to your SPECIFIC needs–it helps make you feel less physically defensive to touch, light, sound, etc.
 
furthermore–

i have worked in both social services (with abused and neglected children) and special education. children who are abused, neglected, etc. often show delays or appear retarded, autistic, etc., because they have not been properly parented and are therefore behind their peers, developmentally. soooo…those who evaluate these children, when deeming appropriate placement, often are forced to put a label upon what they are observing–a four year old child who does not communicate at age level, is not social or is even anti-social, perhaps does not perform age appropriate self-help tasks, is sensitive to touch, light, sound (due to rare fluctuations of exposure–a child, for instance, who lives in a home where the electricity is turned off for prolonged periods is often very sensitive to light because he/she does not have a sensory system that is exposed to light on any sort of consistent basis) can APPEAR to have some sort of developmental disorder…when really it is the result of abuse or neglect. also, people in social services tend to seek out labels for their clients because it is easier to get them the services they need–if a client is borderline, it’s harder to get them the help they need. sort of a double edged sword…

i’m not saying this is the case with you, but you mentioned Children’s Aid…being adopted after that…etc.

just something to think about!
 
Raphaela,

May I suggest a book? Through a Cow’s Eye by Temple Grandin. Besides being a fascinating book about and by a high functioning autistic, there is an interesting chapter regarding autistic “characteristics.” She mentions that several of the characteristics run in Einstein’s family.

As several others have mentioned, there are degrees of autism. Any parent with a child who has mild behavioral/communication problems or learning disabilities is naturally torn between getting as much help for the child as possible and protecting the child from being permanently “labeled.” I’m confident your mother did her best by you. And now that you have a new understanding about your past, it should make the future that much easier.

God bless. Kate
 
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siamesecat:
Yes there definately is. My next door neighbors are like my family. They have a 5 year old autistic son named David. He is mild. If you observed several different autistic children you will become aware that there are different degrees of severity. He does speak and understand, just on a lower level than the rest of his age group. Hes happy, makes eye contact, likes to cuddle and be around people. Severely autistic kids often dont speak, dont appear to understand (although many do), and hate any social contact, refusing to meet peoples eyes or be hugged or anything. You must be very mild as autism is not something you grow out of…if you were mildly autistic as achild u still are you just were so mild that all you probably needed was some special attention in certain areas to get rid of some of your autistic behaviors and bring you up to ‘normal’ level.
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[siamesecat}My next door neighbors (well former…they had to move to be closer to their sons school for autism) are like family to us. They had an autistic son. I love him very much and I am glad it was not known till after the birth of his disability because his mom probably would have aborted him. However, I can see what it did to the rest of the family. They are devastated, struggling to pay a 60k tuition to a school that will help him, and had to move because of it. They cant go many public places, or have much company, and his big sister has suffered a lot from it. It tore the family apart…and they will have to care for him forever…they wont have a retirement…when they die he will probably end up in a home somewhere. That is why I support abortion for a kid with a severe birth defect (and i mean something severe), although i love david very much. I completely understand why some rape victims and parents of special needs children want the children, hwoever I am also understanding of theneed to have an abortion. In rape cases I believe they should be given emergency contraception so that pregnancy will be avoided (i really dont consider it life when the fetus is just a cell). But please dont get me wrong, i know special needs kids can be loving and be loved and that its not their fault…but i understand why some people choose to terminate that kind of pregnancy.

:confused: 😦 :confused: 😦 :confused: 😦

God bless
 
Thanks everyone for your replies!! i thought more about it at work, and I guess my mom did do her best. I have this habit of making her out to be a monster because she’s not an affectionate person with me at all. I guess she was being a mother to me then, which is good!!

I was taken away from a very bad situation when I was 4. As far as I remember we didn’t have very many necessary things, but this could just be my imagination. I know that when my little sister was born, I took care of her, I changed her diapers, fed her (chips and pop, that’s all that was in the house), I put her to sleep and gave her baths. I was her mother because mine was out getting stoned. So at a very important part of my childhood, I didn’t have anyone teaching me anything. That could be the source of this, and not my mother’s drug use, but that was just something that my mom said, but she wasn’t sure.

It’s good to know things about myself now. I’m glad I do. I’ve lived all my 20 years not knowing so much. I’m thinking about getting my records from children’s aid. My fiance says I shouldn’t becuase it might open somethign that I can’t close, but I want more insight. What do you guys think?
 
Re: Temple Grandin mentioned by Kate Q. She is an autistic woman who has a PhD, is/was (?) a professor in Colorado, and designs stockyards! Hence the title about Cow’s Eyes! She has also written Emergence: Labeled Autistic and Thinking in Pictures In one of Oliver Sack’s books, he has a chapter on his meeting with Temple Grandin. These books are wonderfully interesting if you want to learn more about autism.

Peace,
Linda
 
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raphaela:
Thanks everyone for your replies!! i thought more about it at work, and I guess my mom did do her best. I have this habit of making her out to be a monster because she’s not an affectionate person with me at all. I guess she was being a mother to me then, which is good!!

I was taken away from a very bad situation when I was 4. As far as I remember we didn’t have very many necessary things, but this could just be my imagination. I know that when my little sister was born, I took care of her, I changed her diapers, fed her (chips and pop, that’s all that was in the house), I put her to sleep and gave her baths. I was her mother because mine was out getting stoned. So at a very important part of my childhood, I didn’t have anyone teaching me anything. That could be the source of this, and not my mother’s drug use, but that was just something that my mom said, but she wasn’t sure.

It’s good to know things about myself now. I’m glad I do. I’ve lived all my 20 years not knowing so much. I’m thinking about getting my records from children’s aid. My fiance says I shouldn’t becuase it might open somethign that I can’t close, but I want more insight. What do you guys think?
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You sound like you have been through a lot. As a fellow past trauma (can’t remember, then I do ,then I see why I forgot in the first place) person. I can say that there is a tremendous value in revisiting your past with God. To allow all healing of traumas, memories that are needed to live the life He created for us. This is something that is not done over night. Many times in spurts. Like a cork, that bobs over and under the surface of the waves. My advice would be to let Him lead you. But in my experience, before it was ever brought before me to explore my past with God, He made sure I was squared away with the relationships of the people in my present (like your mom), and that I had a VERY solid foundation in Him. Seek Him, and trust Him to guide you. God bless you.
 
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