"Missed Miscarriage" - Pray for us and give us some advice

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My wife and I were so happy to be pregnant for the first time - the best blessing we could ever ask for.
We know something was wrong when we had to go back for our 7 week ultrasound again. There is no heartbeat and our child hasn’t grown for 2 weeks. The doctor has advised us that the child is dead.
Despite the doctor’s conclusion, we have requested another ultrasound (scheduled tomorrow, about 1.5 weeks after the last) to be absolutely certain the child is dead. The doctor is getting concerned for my wife, and doesn’t want sepsis to set in. Hence our push for a final ultrasound. The recommendation is a pill which terminates the pregnancy.

So we have three requests:
  1. Pray for our child, who we loved so dearly (even if only a few weeks with us)
  2. Pray for us- we have been devastated over this
  3. Help us with our dilemma, please provide advice according to our faith: we want to know, if we are certain and have reconfirmed that the child has no heartbeat, no growth, and has passed to Father, and re-confirmed medically as a miscarriage, is the doctor’s recommendation (a pill which we really fear is the same one they give for abortions of viable fetuses) a sin for us? We are also taking their concerns about my wife’s health very seriously but refuse to do anything without re-confirmation tomorrow. My wife and I think that this is consistent with our understanding of the Church’s teaching but want to be sure and solicit your thoughts as well. We feel it will be necessary, but even the mere presence of picking up such a pill feels almost like pure evil entering our home. This is destroying us and we are devastated for our child.
Thanks for everything.
 
Your wife, your precious child, and you will be in my prayers this week. I have no advice to give, but I will offer many prayers for your intentions.
 
Contact a priest to discuss your concerns, as soon as possible, so that you won’t be wishing later that you had done so.

If no life remains, follow your dr’s advice, so as not to jeopardize your wife’s health.

Trust that God knows what’s what, even if you’re unaware of all the details. In times such as these, an hour together in adoration should bring you comfort, closure, and hope for your future years together.

Best wishes to both of you. I’ll keep you in my daily prayers.
 
I’m sorry. I had two miscarriages at around that time in my pregnancy. It’s hard.

There is nothing wrong with getting medical help in your wife’s scenario.

In my case other than ultrasound, they monitored HcG levels, and both times they were going down. You could ask for that blood test if you want further reassurance, to confirm the miscarriage.

Again, I’m sorry for your loss. I’ll keep you in my prayers.
 
Listen to your doctors and follow their advice. Try again. Learn that most pregnancies end in a miscarriage. This is Gods way. Love your children, they are a gift. You are a good parent.

Peace.
 
I did pray my daily Divine Mercy Chaplet for your intentions
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A prayer at the 3 o'clock hour, let's offer something up to the Divine Mercy of Jesus Spirituality
take a minute, set your phone alarm to 15:00, as it goes off say a short prayer to Jesus I did pray my daily Divine Mercy Chaplet for @liquens "Missed Miscarriage" - Pray for us and give us some advice at a different hour. Eternal Father, I offer you the Body and Blood, Soul and Divinity of Your Dearly Beloved Son, Our Lord, Jesus Christ, in atonement for our sins and those of the whole world. For the sake of His sorrowful Passion, have mercy on us. Lord, hear my prayer for these intentions …
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liquens said:
Help us with our dilemma, please provide advice according to our faith: we want to know, if we are certain and have reconfirmed that the child has no heartbeat, no growth, and has passed to Father, and re-confirmed medically as a miscarriage, is the doctor’s recommendation (a pill which we really fear is the same one they give for abortions of viable fetuses) a sin for us?
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I think it’s been addressed implicitly, but since you are probably right about the drug being the same used in abortion, and I don’t want you in distress when you see it, there is no morsl issue.

And sorry for your loss, assuming your next checkup doesn’t reveal a miricle.
 
We went through more or less the same thing, about a year before our son was born. It is very difficult to bear.

In this case, if everyone is certain of what has happened, taking such a medication would be no sin whatsoever. My wife had to have a D&C in our case.

Very sad, very hard. You shall be in my prayers.
 
The sin in abortion is the killing, not the precise method used. (Just as the sin in contraception is preventing conception and not a particular drug, which can have other medical uses.)

If your child has already died (and you have my condolences and prayers if so), then there can be no sin in getting the remains out of your wife’s body before they endanger her medically.
 
Thank you everyone for your prayers and advice. It has comforted us. We are so grateful for all of you and will pray for you as well.

Unfortunately, we didnt get the miracle we had hoped for, but now, in part thanks to you, we have some peace with the path forward.
 
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