Missing Mass

[LaSainte]

Today just before we walked out the door for mass, my 2 year old burned his hand badly on my curling iron and cried for an hour and a half. Needless to say, we did not go to mass. We went to lunch later for Father’s Day and my mom and stepdad left early. There is a 5:00 mass in an hour but I am exhausted and 7 months pregnant and my son needs a nap which he never got this morning due to the burn. My husband also is not thrilled about the idea of changing plans to go at 5 (we had planned for our family to be here all day and hubby had a couple of cocktails at lunch, etc.). Are we o.k. not going today? We REALLY wanted to go this morning but it just didn’t work out.

 

[Joan1969]

Today just before we walked out the door for mass, my 2 year old burned his hand badly on my curling iron and cried for an hour and a half. Needless to say, we did not go to mass. We went to lunch later for Father’s Day and my mom and stepdad left early. There is a 5:00 mass in an hour but I am exhausted and 7 months pregnant and my son needs a nap which he never got this morning due to the burn. My husband also is not thrilled about the idea of changing plans to go at 5 (we had planned for our family to be here all day and hubby had a couple of cocktails at lunch, etc.). Are we o.k. not going today? We REALLY wanted to go this morning but it just didn’t work out.

Hi LaSainte,

It’s my judgement that you should attend the 5:00. I don’t know if you got this message too late or not, but I see nothing that is holding you back unless your little boy needs medical care.

Catholics typically need to attend Mass every Sunday and Holy Day; only medical concerns and other serious problems (travel problems particularly) remove the obligaton.

I hope this helps you. If it’s too late, then don’t stress; run it by a priest in Confession.

God Bless,
Joan

 

[followingtheway]

Today just before we walked out the door for mass, my 2 year old burned his hand badly on my curling iron and cried for an hour and a half. Needless to say, we did not go to mass. We went to lunch later for Father’s Day and my mom and stepdad left early. There is a 5:00 mass in an hour but I am exhausted and 7 months pregnant and my son needs a nap which he never got this morning due to the burn. My husband also is not thrilled about the idea of changing plans to go at 5 (we had planned for our family to be here all day and hubby had a couple of cocktails at lunch, etc.). Are we o.k. not going today? We REALLY wanted to go this morning but it just didn’t work out.

Awww …poor guy :hug1: But no, it’s not a sin. You’re good. Consult a priest about it though :sad_yes:

 

[puzzleannie]

if you can’t get to Mass and caring for a sick child is certainly a good reason, you don’t have an obligation. Yes you should try to get to another Mass but when it comes to moving the entire family sometimes it just does not happen. If you could get away yourself with some of the older kids it would be great, but you do your best to make it a priority of your day, or otherwise make the day as the Lord’s at home even if you cannot get to Mass.

I am going back to Saturday evening Mass in my residential parish because it happened again to day, missed both English Masses due to work demands (death in the family of a catechist, urgent need to work with candidates before sacraments received etc.). Made half the Mass at the Basilica planned to go back to the last Mass there but got hit by a minor health crisis here. There is no evening Mass on campus in the summer. so I am headed up in 15 minutes to a former parish who used to have a 6pm Mass, hope they still do, they don’t have a website.

but . . . I don’t have kids to worry about so my situation is not the same as yours, I can be more flexible.

 

[Joan1969]

Hi to all,

I’ve seen two posts that imply the OP didn’t have an obligaton to attend Mass. I understand about not wanting to leave with a crying child. But after the child was attended, and assuming a doctor’s visit was not needed, then why not go after that? Father’s Day celebrations don’t trump Mass attendence. And today is Holy Trinity Sunday.

I understand the OP’s feelings; I have four kids and I’m expecting another so I do know what it’s like to feel tired and/or overwhelmed. And families do put on the pressure. But when we do the right thing anyway it turns out to be easier than expected and we’re glad we did. And giving in to family pressure only encourages them to put it on again another time, and another.

LaSainte, I hope you don’t take this post as too critical since I really do sympathize with your situation today. But if you can take it to Confession (assuming you didn’t make Mass) I think you’re a lot better off. Mass is such a great gift to us all; let’s take it each and every week.

God Bless,
Joan

 

[Joe_Kelley]

…There is a 5:00 mass in an hour but I am exhausted and 7 months pregnant …

I think this requires that you not stress yourself any more than you have already been stressed today. However, it would probably be well to mention it to your priest at your next confession and let him advise you.

 

[paul11b]

The truth is that none of us unless the person answering is an Ordained Priest will be able to give you to correct answer. To me it sounds like you may be OK but you may not be. I don’t know. If I were you I’d go to confession before next Sunday and explain to the priest the exact circumstances of your situation, he will be able to tell you whether it was a sin or not. If it wasn’t a sin then you get grace for going to confession and if it was you can be forgiven as long as you’re sorry. I hope this helps.

 

[MissRose73]

I would say she was caring for an infant which is a legitimate reason for missing Mass. Her child is still considered an infant and she had to care for his needs first. I would say if she could have made it to a later Mass or one on Sunday, then she should go to that after the child’s needs were attended to.

I am sure her priest can give her the advice and let her know what he thinks is best considering that her child needed medical care, and I am sure that a toddler can be challenging to watch at times no matter if you are pregnant or not.

 

[LaSainte]

Thanks everyone for the responses. I didn’t end up going to Mass. I was practically falling asleep as I typed my message, but then of course I couldn’t sleep because I kept thinking I should be at mass! I know it’s an obligation, and I was so upset to miss the Morning mass we had planned for, as I love Sunday morning mass at our church. Anyway, I am doing the first 5 Saturdays devotion, so I will tell the priest about it anyway at my confession in a couple of weeks. Maybe I should refrain from communion until then?

 

[Joan1969]

Thanks everyone for the responses. I didn’t end up going to Mass. I was practically falling asleep as I typed my message, but then of course I couldn’t sleep because I kept thinking I should be at mass! I know it’s an obligation, and I was so upset to miss the Morning mass we had planned for, as I love Sunday morning mass at our church. Anyway, I am doing the first 5 Saturdays devotion, so I will tell the priest about it anyway at my confession in a couple of weeks. Maybe I should refrain from communion until then?

Hi LaSainte,

I would refrain. I don’t want to stand as an authority in this case, but I do think that you should take it to confession first, preferably with a priest you believe to be solid (not given to encouraging laxity) so you get good advice. But if you do bring it up in Confession with any priest, then that is enough.

It’s true that taking care of a sick child dispenses one from Mass, but I don’t see how that can apply if there are several Masses and two parents who can see to the child’s needs. And if the child went to the lunch with you, then he was also fine to attend Church with you.

I hope I was helpful, and that you don’t let this upset you over the next week or two. Just take it to Confession when you can and be at peace.

God Bless,
Joan

 

[puzzleannie]

my personal stance is to always take missing Mass to confession, even when I feel circumstances were beyond my control, for 2 good reasons, one, so I don’t keep stewing about it, and two, so I don’t fall into the habit of excusing myself from the obligation on a regular basis, and learn to control my life and schedule better.