Mom Explodes Upon Hearing of Conversion

[Seeking33]

Well, I did it this weekend. Over Thanksgiving holiday while spending the weekend with my Mom and Dad, I revealed the horrible truth. I’m CATHOLIC

Needless to say, Mom was NOT too happy. We had an extemely heated discussion in which she fired ammunition at me in the form of questions like:

1. So, do you pray to saints now? 2. Do you have a Catholic Bible now? 3. Do you have a father now? 4. Do you pray to the pope ( )? 5. Do you do all those chants?

And a kind question of … What have you done? I felt like a 4 year old that just spilled a pitcher of koolaid on her newly mopped floor.

Then a nice comment at the end… I hope you call and let me and your Dad know when you decide to become Mormon so that we can counsel you. Very ugly! I said, Mom, I’m not going to be a mormon and she just scoffed at that remark! BTW, my parents are life-long Southern Baptists…through and through.

<A little background…I come from a traditional home, but in my late teens rebelled severely…had 3 children (twins and 1 a year older) outside of my race. My parents were so upset that they rejected me for years and wouldn’t see me. Even now, they are still ashamed and when I go home, there are no pictures of my children in their house and we don’t go out in public>

Even though I’m telling this story in a light way, I really am very hurt by it all. It has shaken my faith, truly. I’ve been having these thoughts of “I don’t want to be Catholic” and doubting myself and my decision. I know that’s weak, but I’ve just really been under social pressure since my decision. There has been no support from one human being except with acquaintences in the RCIA program. And I’ve been real discouraged being a single mom and trying to go get “doughnuts” after mass. All I see is huge, extended families acting so happy and I feel like I just blend into the wall. I feel as though I don’t fit in. Everyone is so caught up in their own families, that I feel like I stick out like a sore thumb. I’m not used to that. In protestant churches, people just seem more friendly and inviting. I’m just way out of my comfort zone…and feeling depressed about finding the Truth. Isn’t that just something? I went from elated about finding the truth, to now, I just don’t want to think about it anymore. I know it is the enemy that is making me feel this way, but I don’t know how to fight it. I will not abandon my faith, but the trials are very hard right now, and I’m just hurting. Can someone relate or offer any words of advice?

 

[kp1]

Seeking33:

I went from elated about finding the truth, to now, I just don’t want to think about it anymore. I know it is the enemy that is making me feel this way, but I don’t know how to fight it. I will not abandon my faith, but the trials are very hard right now, and I’m just hurting. Can someone relate or offer any words of advice?

It is satan whispering in your ear! He can not stand for anyone to turn Catholic and to the truth! It is the only think he can not ruin, control, destroy! So he tried to make us stray from it by making it seem too hard.

Pray the St. Michael Prayer and often! He is given special powers by God to defend and protect the flock. Pray for your family and that their hearts can be softened. Remeber people hate what they think the Catholics believe and not the truth!

Be vigilant my sister! God has a purpose for you, and you were never meant to do it alone. Someone will come out of the woodwork to be your aid and comfort! Pray for serenity!

 

[Ryniev]

I’m so sorry for what you are going through right now! I don’t have many words of wisdom but I think you are very brave.

 

[LSK]

Seeking33:

Well, I did it this weekend. Over Thanksgiving holiday while spending the weekend with my Mom and Dad, I revealed the horrible truth. I’m CATHOLIC

Needless to say, Mom was NOT too happy. We had an extemely heated discussion in which she fired ammunition at me in the form of questions like:

1. So, do you pray to saints now? 2. Do you have a Catholic Bible now? 3. Do you have a father now? 4. Do you pray to the pope ( )? 5. Do you do all those chants?

And a kind question of … What have you done? I felt like a 4 year old that just spilled a pitcher of koolaid on her newly mopped floor.

Then a nice comment at the end… I hope you call and let me and your Dad know when you decide to become Mormon so that we can counsel you. Very ugly! I said, Mom, I’m not going to be a mormon and she just scoffed at that remark! BTW, my parents are life-long Southern Baptists…through and through.

<A little background…I come from a traditional home, but in my late teens rebelled severely…had 3 children (twins and 1 a year older) outside of my race. My parents were so upset that they rejected me for years and wouldn’t see me. Even now, they are still ashamed and when I go home, there are no pictures of my children in their house and we don’t go out in public>

Even though I’m telling this story in a light way, I really am very hurt by it all. It has shaken my faith, truly. I’ve been having these thoughts of “I don’t want to be Catholic” and doubting myself and my decision. I know that’s weak, but I’ve just really been under social pressure since my decision. There has been no support from one human being except with acquaintences in the RCIA program. And I’ve been real discouraged being a single mom and trying to go get “doughnuts” after mass. All I see is huge, extended families acting so happy and I feel like I just blend into the wall. I feel as though I don’t fit in. Everyone is so caught up in their own families, that I feel like I stick out like a sore thumb. I’m not used to that. In protestant churches, people just seem more friendly and inviting. I’m just way out of my comfort zone…and feeling depressed about finding the Truth. Isn’t that just something? I went from elated about finding the truth, to now, I just don’t want to think about it anymore. I know it is the enemy that is making me feel this way, but I don’t know how to fight it. I will not abandon my faith, but the trials are very hard right now, and I’m just hurting. Can someone relate or offer any words of advice?

OH baby girl, you are home. Listen, I am a widow woman with no children and I understand. I’m a cradle Catholic and sometimes I can feel all alone too! You just march right on up to that donut table and put out your hand and say HELLO!!! How old are your kids? Can you get involved in the Moms group? Is there any Toddler times or St. Vincent de Paul Society or anything at all you can do there while you are in RCIA? Sometimes the best way is just to plunge right on in…and I think you are a very brave person.

So, just hitch up your big girl pants, and get to it…no more crying and no more listening to Satan trying to lure you away from the Faith. That’s just enough…you deserve ONLY THE BEST…so get to work and WELCOME HOME…

 

[CatholicSam]

My MIL acted the same way when my husband converted (before we married). He’s been Catholic for about three and a half years now, and it’s getting better. We just all know that religion (other than generic Christian talk) is not something we talk about with each other.

Your mother probably feels like you are telling her that her church isn’t good enough for you and all the traditions and religious things you did as a Baptsist as a child are worthless to you now.

But believe me, it DOES get better The other day we saw the dear priest who married us and he told us that he has enough of a sense of humor to ask us to tell my MIL that he sends his best We actually had the nerve to tell her, and she wasn’t even phased by it.

By the way, what does your father think of all of this?

 

[MulusChristi]

Dear Seeking,
I will pray for you. You were very brave to tell your parents. :clapping: Now that you have told your parents, I’d let it rest with them for a while. Saint Francis of Assisi (one of those guys you can pray to now ) used to say “Preach always, use words if necessary”. Concentrate on your duties as a Catholic mother.

We Catholics are pretty weak on the welcoming ministries, unfortunately. You’ll probably have to do a little more work, but it will be worth it. Keep going to the donuts. It is difficult, but you will eventually fit in. I doubt that anyone is judiging you. We’re just happy you’re there.

Seek opportunities to get involved with the life of the parish.  If you could get your kids into the local Catholic school, that would get you into it.  If not that, get your kids into religious instruction and talk with the parents who seem to care about their faith.  Talk with a priest or deacon in the parish and explain your situation.  They will have insight into ministries which may help you.  Also, perhaps a neighboring parish is more suited to your family's needs.  Look around a little.  


Welcome home!  We're glad you made it!  :thumbsup: 

           In Christ,
           Mulus

 

[Agricola]

Seeking33,

Have compassion for your parents. Pray for them. But whatever you do, don’t give in to them! God is merciful, and with your prayers, and those of the people who have subscribed to this thread, you may live to see the day when your parents, though Southern-Baptist’s they may be, fall into the ranks of the Church militant, put your childrens’ pictures on their mantle and night-tables, and eventually enter heaven to the sound of trumpets and angels’ voices.

Keep your chin up, and your rosary handy.
God bless,

Agricola

 

[mercygate]

Seeking33:

Well, I did it this weekend. Over Thanksgiving holiday while spending the weekend with my Mom and Dad, I revealed the horrible truth. I’m CATHOLIC

Man! What did you expect? Roses?

What more horrible thing can a Southern Baptist girl do than have 3 babies “outside her race” (how’s that done? I didn’t think humans could mate with any other species) – may we assume those babies were conceived without benefit of clergy? And now (oh! the unspeakable SHAME of it!): you’ve gone and hooked yourself up with – can I even type the word? – the Cath**** the Whore of Babylon! Aaahhhh!

Seriously: I have some idea of what all this amounts to in the culture you describe, and there’s just nothing you can do about it except live your life with as much integrity and conviction as you can. Bring up those children to love God and try to help them respect their grandparents.

Maybe one day (if you don’t already have one) a great guy will come into your lives – and if not, well: you’ll work it out under the grace of God.

 

[KCT]

Wow, it didn’t take long for you to be persecuted for your faith! Keep praying and keep receiving the sacraments. That’s where your strength will come from! —KCT

 

[dhgray]

Welcome to the Family…this too shall pass. Of course, they are Southern Baptists, it might not pass…either way, you have friends here to help and support you.

 

[OutinChgoburbs]

LSK:

OH baby girl, you are home. Listen, I am a widow woman with no children and I understand. I’m a cradle Catholic and sometimes I can feel all alone too! You just march right on up to that donut table and put out your hand and say HELLO!!! How old are your kids? Can you get involved in the Moms group? Is there any Toddler times or St. Vincent de Paul Society or anything at all you can do there while you are in RCIA? Sometimes the best way is just to plunge right on in…and I think you are a very brave person.

So, just hitch up your big girl pants, and get to it…no more crying and no more listening to Satan trying to lure you away from the Faith. That’s just enough…you deserve ONLY THE BEST…so get to work and WELCOME HOME…

Oh Leslie…you are just soooo good at this!!!

I have nothing to add, except you are here. It may not seem like much, but CAF is a place, however cyber it might be, and we are all here, too. We can’t replace a parish, and shouldn’t, but if ever there was a bunch who will speak their minds, and extend their hearts, we are IT.

My parents are not the nicest, doubt everything I say and do, and I am a cradle Catholic (more or less) who is well over 40. No doubt about it, IT HURTS.

I have made the acquaintance of a lovely woman, Patty Bonds. Her brother is some Protestant minister who has taken on no less than CA’s own Jimmy Akin (and in my opinion, Jimmy gave him a shellacking). She is well-versed in the feelings caused by family who don’t really know what Catholic is:

bringyou.to/apologetics/s2.htm

marysmantle.org/home.htm

It may take her some time to write back, but she DOES write back.

You might also try the Journey Home Network:

chnetwork.org

And you can always PM me.

 

[David_Zampino]

Seeking33:

Well, I did it this weekend. Over Thanksgiving holiday while spending the weekend with my Mom and Dad, I revealed the horrible truth. I’m CATHOLIC

Needless to say, Mom was NOT too happy. We had an extemely heated discussion in which she fired ammunition at me in the form of questions like:

1. So, do you pray to saints now? 2. Do you have a Catholic Bible now? 3. Do you have a father now? 4. Do you pray to the pope ( )? 5. Do you do all those chants?

And a kind question of … What have you done? I felt like a 4 year old that just spilled a pitcher of koolaid on her newly mopped floor.

Then a nice comment at the end… I hope you call and let me and your Dad know when you decide to become Mormon so that we can counsel you. Very ugly! I said, Mom, I’m not going to be a mormon and she just scoffed at that remark! BTW, my parents are life-long Southern Baptists…through and through.

<A little background…I come from a traditional home, but in my late teens rebelled severely…had 3 children (twins and 1 a year older) outside of my race. My parents were so upset that they rejected me for years and wouldn’t see me. Even now, they are still ashamed and when I go home, there are no pictures of my children in their house and we don’t go out in public>

Even though I’m telling this story in a light way, I really am very hurt by it all. It has shaken my faith, truly. I’ve been having these thoughts of “I don’t want to be Catholic” and doubting myself and my decision. I know that’s weak, but I’ve just really been under social pressure since my decision. There has been no support from one human being except with acquaintences in the RCIA program. And I’ve been real discouraged being a single mom and trying to go get “doughnuts” after mass. All I see is huge, extended families acting so happy and I feel like I just blend into the wall. I feel as though I don’t fit in. Everyone is so caught up in their own families, that I feel like I stick out like a sore thumb. I’m not used to that. In protestant churches, people just seem more friendly and inviting. I’m just way out of my comfort zone…and feeling depressed about finding the Truth. Isn’t that just something? I went from elated about finding the truth, to now, I just don’t want to think about it anymore. I know it is the enemy that is making me feel this way, but I don’t know how to fight it. I will not abandon my faith, but the trials are very hard right now, and I’m just hurting. Can someone relate or offer any words of advice?

Believe me, you are in my prayers.

Forgive my cynicism here, but why do your parents choose to take their anger against you out on your kids? What did THEY do wrong?

Forgive my saying so, but to my way of looking at things, their rejection of your children – regardless of the circumstances surrounding their conception – removes them from having ANY moral “high ground” about ANYTHING in your life, ESPECIALLY your spiritual journey.

Blessings,

 

[Teen_Catholic]

Sadly, I went through the exact same thing when my parents found out about my conversion, exept for in my case my parents are agnostics, and so they just attacked Christianity altogether. (Believe it or not, they made a similar coment about driving by a Latter Day Saints church,). All I can say is to persevere, eventually the rude comments and insults just becomes lighter and lighter, until eventually it only comes up once a month or so.

 The lonelyness is there too, but I can almost guarentee if you stick with the parish you'll find tons of people you can share your faith with. :D 

The only thing I can say is pray pray pray! Rosaries helped alot... You'll be in my prayers.

Keep strong and persevere!

 

[Lone_Catholic]

Seeking–You might be surprised out how many people there are like you out there! I agree that the Coming Home Network might be of great help to you.

I am a new convert also and have encountered alot of resistance as well, but mainly on the in-law side. My MIL is an ex-Catholic and also VERY anti-Catholic.

As far as the “fellowship” issue–It is hard to get in there and meet people, that is for sure! Good for you for going in for the donuts! I didn’t do that for a long time and really still don’t much. My family moved to a new area a few months ago, and I still don’t know anyone in my new parish. I had the priest come bless our new house so I could get to know him, and I’ve met the deacon, and talked to a few other people here and there when I have tried to get involved in different areas. Meanwhile, my I go with my husband and kids to an evangelical church as well, and we have met so many nice people, I got involved in their homeschool group and have met alot of people there. I just wish I could have that support system in MY church. I definitely don’t have it all figured out. The one thing I know is that the few people I have become friends with who are good strong Catholics are wonderful friends and will be friends for a lifetime. We have a bond that I can’t have with my evangelical friends. I guess you just have to try extra hard and maybe it will be worth it. Also, keep your cyber friends! PM if you would like as well. I know the single mother thing is hard–My sister is a single mom of 2 and has such a hard time in even her Baptist church, just because so many things are centered around marriages and families.

I’ll be praying for you!

 

[MrS]

Wow, God must love you very much. He only gives us as heavy a cross as we can bear - but you must do your part, and ask for the graces (strength) to carry your cross.

One Lord, One Faith, One Baptism. Any good Baptist will know that verse… but they don’t accept that the one faith comes most fully in the Catholic Church because it is the ONLY church started by Jesus.

Just don’t send your parents a birthday card in 2009 as their church - started by John Smith in England, and Rodger Williams in American - celebrates 400 years of existence, and nearly as many separate Baptist theologies.

God bless you and keep you safe, you and the children you bore for His glory.

 

[SeekerJen]

LSK:

OH baby girl, you are home. Listen, I am a widow woman with no children and I understand. I’m a cradle Catholic and sometimes I can feel all alone too! You just march right on up to that donut table and put out your hand and say HELLO!!! How old are your kids? Can you get involved in the Moms group? Is there any Toddler times or St. Vincent de Paul Society or anything at all you can do there while you are in RCIA? Sometimes the best way is just to plunge right on in…and I think you are a very brave person.

So, just hitch up your big girl pants, and get to it…no more crying and no more listening to Satan trying to lure you away from the Faith. That’s just enough…you deserve ONLY THE BEST…so get to work and WELCOME HOME…

What she said.

I’m a cradle Catholic, late 20s, married but looks like we very well may never bear our own children, and believe me, I feel out of place lots of times. Seems like everyone is either a lot younger or a lot older than me, and anyone near my age is pregnant and/or has a bunch of kids, which automatically puts up a barrier (unintentional on both sides, but it always seems to be there- moms gravitate to other moms).

Yeah, sometimes I feel alone. My husband isn’t Catholic, and my parents’ attendance is rather spotty. But, I made myself overcome my innate shyness and out-of-place feelings and joined the parish choir and the St. Vincent de Paul conference. Just by joining those two groups, I have met so many other people in the parish. And now, I have people to chat with at the donut table after Mass. And in the supermarket. And the pharmacy. And the bookstore. And local restaurants…

Trust me. Pray for grace and courage, make the effort, and soon you will feel at home and won’t ever want to leave.

 

[MJE]

Seeking 33, you are a courageous soul and what an example to your children. Joining some group in your parish, even if just for a while, will open doors to new friends and fellow doughnut-eaters. Get involved w/ your local Right to Life group. You will meet beautiful people and some from your parish. Will keep you in my prayers and keep us updated on your journey. God has great plans for you.

 

[Fashina86]

You amaze me and have my prayers! Best of luck… everybody else said what I was going to say… I will reply again if I have any words of wisdom!

Laura

 

[Viki59]

Dear Seeking,
It is so hard to start attending a new church. I sympathize. That is good advice, to find some group in the church that you can attend and fellowship with. I joined the Respect Life committee and enjoy it a lot.
I was a single parent in an evangelical church for about 17 years. In the south it may be different, but in the Northwest I found that the warm welcome was mostly superficial. I hungered for friendship, but rarely found any. Finally I began attending a women’s Bible Study and wasn’t quite so lonely.
After being in a Catholic church for nine years, I can say that it takes those folks awhile to warm up, but the friendships you do make are solid ones.
I am not trying to put down protestant churches, this was just my experience.
I noticed an earlier post that mentioned your interest in Spanish masses – have you ever located one? I ask because hispanic people seem less uptight about race, and are more tolerant of young children at mass.
I’ll be praying for you. Don’t stop attending mass; you’ve just started on a great adventure, and what a wonderful gift for your children, to raise them in the faith.

 

[Nance]

LSK:

OH baby girl, you are home. Listen, I am a widow woman with no children and I understand. I’m a cradle Catholic and sometimes I can feel all alone too! You just march right on up to that donut table and put out your hand and say HELLO!!! How old are your kids? Can you get involved in the Moms group? Is there any Toddler times or St. Vincent de Paul Society or anything at all you can do there while you are in RCIA? Sometimes the best way is just to plunge right on in…and I think you are a very brave person.

So, just hitch up your big girl pants, and get to it…no more crying and no more listening to Satan trying to lure you away from the Faith. That’s just enough…you deserve ONLY THE BEST…so get to work and WELCOME HOME…

Ditto

Don’t you give up…It is sooooooo worth it, the loneliness will pass and by golly just when the chips are down Jesus comes to the rescue .