Morality of feeling stressed?

[Kathrin]

I had just received the Eucharist and already I was having stressful/angry thoughts.I was worried of missing my bus and the things I still needed (or felt I needed) to do, and I felt an angry thought when the priest and the other helpers shared the cup of the Blood!!! Like I was thinking, oh no, do they all have to still drink from that too?
Maybe I should have posted this in spirituality, asking people how they deal with feeling stressed. But since I feel abd about it I thought I’d post it in moral theology. I guess this was probably not mortally sinful because it went so fast and I regretted and asked forgiveness right away, but still… So what is the morality of a thought like that? Is it worse because it was about the Blood of Christ? If there is any sin in it, is it because I wasn’t reverent enough to let the reverence blot out all stressful thoughts?
Or do I just have to work on my spirituality? Yes I know I am scrupulous, but I know I do also have an issue with patience…

Kathrin

 

[Kristopher]

I had just received the Eucharist and already I was having stressful/angry thoughts. … what is the morality of a thought like that? … it was about the Blood of Christ? … I know I am scrupulous, but I know I do also have an issue with patience.

Kathrin

Kathrin,

I’ve had thoughts like that myself. They haven’t persisted on my conscience to the extent of even remembering to confess them; when confession came around.

I started reading a book, a handbook, which goes back to the 1700’s: originally written in Italian. I forget the title–something like: Light and Peace. It is based on what a saint wrote, wish I could remember his name, anyway–it addressed, to some extent, your concerns. What I remember of it, there is this part: sometimes we go to church, and we sit there, and we think, that we are just like one of those statues–just there for people to see, and we should be grateful for this. You went to mass. You received communion. You walked out the door. It may be your sin is doubt, in those who are responsible for making certain the chalice is suitable for others to drink, and in God to keep you from whatever harm might come to you. Perhaps you are guilty as well, of being in doubt, against your priest. They were thoughts, not the best, but thoughts just the same–maybe they were more temptation than anything else. Wouldn’t hurt to confess those thoughts, if they persist to the time, that you would ordinarily go to confess.

I’d say, in the future, when you go through this again, think about how you are going to do things. What can you do to handle the stress? You can get there to mass just for communion, and leave immediately afterwards. A short visit is good.

Let me know, what you get worked out.

So far as handling stress goes: I’ve been diagnosed with a number of different disorders, the general type–anxiety, depression, personality, and I have a broken-back. I suspect, that I have Post-traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) as a consequence of combat, in Desert Shield / Desert Storm. I do what I can at times, to breathe in through my nose, to get oxygen into my brain. I breathe into my back muscles to relax them, wherever I feel tension, and I do what I can to get my mind off thoughts about things I don’t like, but it can be “sticky” at times.

I don’t want to exhaust you with much more, but you maybe already missed your bus anyway.

 

[Kathrin]

Kristopher,

you didn’t exhaust me. Your reply really touched me. And reading that you have been through combat… just makes me feel in awe at what you must have gone through. I have a very good friend who is a Vietnam vet, and it is so hard sometimes, STILL, for him.

Reading something like this I can put little “stresses” like maybe missing a bus in perspective.
(I caught it, by the way.)

In terms of sin, it may have been a temptation or a venial sin then, not mortal? I really felt bad because it was right after communion… like I had been “cleansed” and then I was already “dirty” again.

Kathrin

 

[Kristopher]

… Your reply really touched me. And reading that you have been through combat… just makes me feel in awe at what you must have gone through. I have a very good friend who is a Vietnam vet, and it is so hard sometimes, STILL, for him. … In terms of sin, it may have been a temptation or a venial sin then, not mortal? I really felt bad because it was right after communion… like I had been “cleansed” and then I was already “dirty” again.

Kathrin

Thank you for being touched, like your Viet Nam vet. friend, I still have a difficult time as well. I think, that whatever sin was there; it is only venial–it is an offense against some truth; though, the weight of it, isn’t really much, but this is evidenced to me by the fact, that you really don’t know, but have to be here asking questions about it. In order for it to be a mortal sin–you have to commit to the the thought, the word, the deed, with full knowledge of it being grave in matter. You clearly do not know, but are in doubt about it.

(I read your public profile.)

 

[RobHom]

Kristopher… I sent you an e-mail through this site… I hope it gets to you “Brother”.

Kathrin…Without going into more detail than is necessary… I too am a Vietnam Veteran…two and a half years worth. If you even suspect that your friend has PTSD…please, please, please…gently but kindly and firmly encourage him to go to the nearest VA facility and be examined and go through the system to get any necessary treatment that he needs.

Here are some resources about “PTSD”:

ncptsd.va.gov/ncmain/information/what_is.jsp

ncptsd.va.gov/ncmain/ncdocs/fact_shts/fs_what_is_ptsd.html

ncptsd.va.gov/ncmain/ncdocs/fact_shts/fs_faqs_on_ptsd.html

ncptsd.va.gov/ncmain/ncdocs/fact_shts/fs_how_common_is_ptsd.html

If anyone, who reads this, knows a combat veteran…whom you suspect has PTSD…please try to get them to get help. Far too many combat veterans have committed suicide because of this.

The VA has taken a much better approach to this issue… I know this from personal experience. I have PTSD, but I am now being treated for it.

Pray for these men and women…they need it!

Thanks…more than you know…Rob

 

[LilyM]

I had just received the Eucharist and already I was having stressful/angry thoughts.I was worried of missing my bus and the things I still needed (or felt I needed) to do, and I felt an angry thought when the priest and the other helpers shared the cup of the Blood!!! Like I was thinking, oh no, do they all have to still drink from that too?
Maybe I should have posted this in spirituality, asking people how they deal with feeling stressed. But since I feel abd about it I thought I’d post it in moral theology. I guess this was probably not mortally sinful because it went so fast and I regretted and asked forgiveness right away, but still… So what is the morality of a thought like that? Is it worse because it was about the Blood of Christ? If there is any sin in it, is it because I wasn’t reverent enough to let the reverence blot out all stressful thoughts?
Or do I just have to work on my spirituality? Yes I know I am scrupulous, but I know I do also have an issue with patience…

Kathrin

Feelings in and of themselves aren’t always within our control - sometimes they really do pop out of nowhere.

It is only sinful if you don’t make some effort to dismiss them when they do pop up (by, for example, offering a prayer for those people you are angry with, or for whatever situation is stressing you, if your feeling is anger or stress)

 

[Kathrin]

My friend has spent a lot of time at the VA hospital over the last couple of years, but mostly due to medical problems.

He has been on an antidepressant medication too.

Not for a long time though. When I first met him, about 10 years ago, he was homeless and drinking and just a “heap of misery” sometimes. A real miracle story though - the way he is now, compared to then!! He was what many would call the typical “homeless drunk”. Now he has a room and a sweet cat… did relapse into drinking again, but I enver gave up hope that he would make it again. And he did. He is a very sweet person, has helped ME out a lot too.

Kathrin

 

[RobHom]

I’m happy that he is getting help… If he is still having problems, he needs to get back with them and re-evaluated. It is good that he has a caring friend in his life. Do you know if he has or is participating in any group therapies or a one-on-one therapy?

 

[Kathrin]

As far as I know, he is not in any therapy for his PTSD, not regularly anyway.
I am from Switzerland and spend a lot of time in the US, but of course there are again and again month-long periods where I don’t see him. We write and talk on the phone though. He has really become one of my ebst friends over there.

 

[Kathrin]

(by, for example, offering a prayer for those people you are angry with, or for whatever situation is stressing you, if your feeling is anger or stress)

That’s what I usually do if I get overtaken by feelings of anger. It is the most wonderful thing to do then.