more confession questions

[truthquester]

I was wondering something about confession, if someone just wanted to talk something over, but it wasn’t really a confession but something that a person felt confused about such as a problem that they were having with a family member, should that person go to confession or somebody else for that.

Would you consider that wasting your time, or do you encourage people to talk about things (if it seems important) if you can help them out with it?

 

[Incomplete]

I was wondering something about confession, if someone just wanted to talk something over, but it wasn’t really a confession but something that a person felt confused about such as a problem that they were having with a family member, should that person go to confession or somebody else for that.

Would you consider that wasting your time, or do you encourage people to talk about things (if it seems important) if you can help them out with it?

If it’s not a matter for confession, but you have a confessor you trust, you could make a private appointment with him to talk about it. Don’t go to confession for this kind of conversation, though.

 

[otjm]

I was wondering something about confession, if someone just wanted to talk something over, but it wasn’t really a confession but something that a person felt confused about such as a problem that they were having with a family member, should that person go to confession or somebody else for that.

Would you consider that wasting your time, or do you encourage people to talk about things (if it seems important) if you can help them out with it?

If what you need is what would come under the category of psychological help (family matters often come under this general umbrella) then you should see a family counselor or family psychologist.

Some priests are well trained in psychology and counseling; others are not so well trained, and some of them are a train wreck looking for a place to happen. It is a whole lot less about trusting a confessor than it is in getting the type of help you need. It is a bit like breaking your arm; you don’t go to the dentist to take care of it. You might go to a general practitioner, who may or may not be able to do what is correct and necessary; but you might be a whole lot better off with an orthopedic surgeon.

The point about making an appointment is important; if I am standing in line for the confessional, and you are ahead of me, I may not be able to get to confession because you are in there for something other than confessing your sins. It needs to go somewhere else - thus the appointment.

 

[Incomplete]

Some priests are well trained in psychology and counseling; others are not so well trained, and some of them are a train wreck looking for a place to happen.

This is also an important point.

I should have worded what I said a bit differently. If you have something personal you need to talk about in general, then you need to know if you need a friend, a counselor, a priest, or someone else. I make appointments with my priest for general stuff, but that’s because I want to know how to relate it to how to live a Christian life…and when you mentioned bringing it up in confession, I guess I assumed that’s the kind of advice you were looking for. That is always the goal when I talk to him. I wouldn’t go to him just to talk about things in my life generally speaking, or even how to solve problems in other areas.

 

[truthquester]

I know what I said must have been a bit confusing, but what you said is what I meant. How would I approach certain problems with good moraility kind of advice, some kind of advice that would avoid me having to make a confession in the future, lol.

 

[Zekariya]

I know what I said must have been a bit confusing, but what you said is what I meant. How would I approach certain problems with good moraility kind of advice, some kind of advice that would avoid me having to make a confession in the future, lol.

Any question pertaining to a sin that you struggle with should be fine to bring up in Confession. If you feel that you have so many questions that it would take up an undue amount of time to discuss during Confession (with others waiting in line), it might be better to schedule an appointment. Of course it varies from priest to priest.