More same-sex marriage, but with a twist this time!

[Nevarlander]

So one of my friends and I (we’re both women) are close enough that we’d be glad to live together for the rest of our lives once I’m finished with school. I suppose you could call it a “Boston marriage”, if they called it that these days

Imagining we settled down in a state that recognizes same-sex marriages or “domestic partnerships”, would it be all right that we get married to take advantage of the legal conveniences? We wouldn’t be going out and trying to pretend we had a sacramental marriage (we’re both Catholic), just having our “live in the same house, each other’s legal primary point of contact etc.” arrangement down on legal papers for our own safety.

 

[RosaryFan]

So one of my friends and I (we’re both women) are close enough that we’d be glad to live together for the rest of our lives once I’m finished with school. I suppose you could call it a “Boston marriage”, if they called it that these days

Imagining we settled down in a state that recognizes same-sex marriages or “domestic partnerships”, would it be all right that we get married to take advantage of the legal conveniences? We wouldn’t be going out and trying to pretend we had a sacramental marriage (we’re both Catholic), just having our “live in the same house, each other’s legal primary point of contact etc.” arrangement down on legal papers for our own safety.

That would be a strange scenario (and getting less strange by the day…), but if you were to marry for the sole purpose of taking advantage of the legal conveniences, I think it would not be morally acceptable because you would be making a mockery of the sacrament of marriage. Just my opinion.

 

[nmoerbeek]

So one of my friends and I (we’re both women) are close enough that we’d be glad to live together for the rest of our lives once I’m finished with school. I suppose you could call it a “Boston marriage”, if they called it that these days

Imagining we settled down in a state that recognizes same-sex marriages or “domestic partnerships”, would it be all right that we get married to take advantage of the legal conveniences? We wouldn’t be going out and trying to pretend we had a sacramental marriage (we’re both Catholic), just having our “live in the same house, each other’s legal primary point of contact etc.” arrangement down on legal papers for our own safety.

It would be promoting scandal.

 

[Nevarlander]

It would be promoting scandal.

Howso, if it weren’t public?

 

[JimG]

If marriage is anything, yes, it can be anything and everything. Two same-sex non-gay friends who wished to live together and “marry” for the sake of the legal benefits, could marry. it would be perfectly legal, provided same sex marriage is legal.

The same would apply to a mother and daughter living together, or a mother and son, or any two people of any gender or sexual orientation whatever. Marriage is becoming a purely legal matter, essentially void of meaning. So sure, non-gay friends could marry.

 

[gardenswithkids]

So one of my friends and I (we’re both women) are close enough that we’d be glad to live together for the rest of our lives once I’m finished with school. I suppose you could call it a “Boston marriage”, if they called it that these days

Imagining we settled down in a state that recognizes same-sex marriages or “domestic partnerships”, would it be all right that we get married to take advantage of the legal conveniences? We wouldn’t be going out and trying to pretend we had a sacramental marriage (we’re both Catholic), just having our “live in the same house, each other’s legal primary point of contact etc.” arrangement down on legal papers for our own safety.

I don’t think so, nor do I think it would be a good idea.

Some reasons why I don’t think it’s a good idea on a merely practical level. It also binds you both in a legal contract to each other. Breaking it off could be messy if either of you ever meet someone you really wanted to marry in the future or if you get job transfers, or choose to move out for any other reason in the future. Your finances would be tied together. If one of you ends up making substantially more or less money than the other, or one of you runs into serious financial trouble, or one of you owes lots of $$ for student loans while the other doesn’t, you may end up fighting over money in ways that roommates don’t usually have to discuss. Living together with a close friend as a roommate should not involve all these complication.

From the moral standpoint, you would be supporting same sex union by participating in one. Statisticians wouldn’t separate your mock partnership from other homosexual unions. Whatever tax or legal advantage you think this offers you personally, it still costs a great deal to society by making of mockery of what real marriage is.

Practically speaking, I think you would eventually serious regret if you did this.

 

[gardenswithkids]

Howso, if it weren’t public?

It would be in the public records, therefore it would be public.

 

[nmoerbeek]

Howso, if it weren’t public?

It would promoting scandal because the church condemns marriage between people of the same sex. To then partake in it would be separating yourself from the flock so to speak. It is also a matter of public record and sense you are doing it for Tax Benefits all those who handle your financial matters would have knowledge of it.

 

[GratefulDad]

It is scandalous, no question, but also keep in mind the Marital Embrace and human sexuality is a sacred gift from God. So using those gifts as a tool or something other than what God the creator intended them for is wrong.

Check this from Romans 1, saw it on another thread today. It speaks the truth pretty well.

14 To Greeks and non-Greeks alike, to the wise and the ignorant, I am under obligation;
15 that is why I am eager to preach the gospel also to you in Rome.
16 For I am not ashamed of the gospel. It is the power of God for the salvation of everyone who believes: for Jew first, and then Greek.
17 For in it is revealed the righteousness of God from faith to faith; as it is written, “The one who is righteous by faith will live.”
18 The wrath of God is indeed being revealed from heaven against every impiety and wickedness of those who suppress the truth by their wickedness.
19 For what can be known about God is evident to them, because God made it evident to them.
20 Ever since the creation of the world, his invisible attributes of eternal power and divinity have been able to be understood and perceived in what he has made. As a result, they have no excuse;
21 for although they knew God they did not accord him glory as God or give him thanks. Instead, they became vain in their reasoning, and their senseless minds were darkened.
22 While claiming to be wise, they became fools
23 and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for the likeness of an image of mortal man or of birds or of four-legged animals or of snakes.
24 Therefore, God handed them over to impurity through the lusts of their hearts for the mutual degradation of their bodies.
25 They exchanged the truth of God for a lie and revered and worshiped the creature rather than the creator, who is blessed forever. Amen.
26 Therefore, God handed them over to degrading passions. Their females exchanged natural relations for unnatural,
27 and the males likewise gave up natural relations with females and burned with lust for one another. Males did shameful things with males and thus received in their own persons the due penalty for their perversity.
28 And since they did not see fit to acknowledge God, God handed them over to their undiscerning mind to do what is improper.
29 They are filled with every form of wickedness, evil, greed, and malice; full of envy, murder, rivalry, treachery, and spite. They are gossips
30 and scandalmongers and they hate God. They are insolent, haughty, boastful, ingenious in their wickedness, and rebellious toward their parents.
31 They are senseless, faithless, heartless, ruthless.
32 Although they know the just decree of God that all who practice such things deserve death, they not only do them but give approval to those who practice them.

 

[Nevarlander]

To whoever it was that gave me the advice about it being unwise if we decided to separate, that was actually helpful, we’ll have to talk it over more.

It would promoting scandal because the church condemns marriage between people of the same sex. To then partake in it would be separating yourself from the flock so to speak. It is also a matter of public record and sense you are doing it for Tax Benefits all those who handle your financial matters would have knowledge of it.

Same-sex marriage is condemned because the people who get married like that normally want to be seen as the exact same thing as a regular married couple. We don’t. As I’ve said before, we’re not interested in this being public, and if I didn’t say it before, we’re not a lesbian couple.

Also, I thought it was only scandalous if it was known that it was a Catholic doing it and it was bringing drama on Catholicism as a whole. idk how the tax/public records people would know my religion unless I told them.

It is scandalous, no question, but also keep in mind the Marital Embrace and human sexuality is a sacred gift from God. So using those gifts as a tool or something other than what God the creator intended them for is wrong.

What in the world does this have to do with anything? As I said above, we’re not lesbians.

 

[nmoerbeek]

To whoever it was that gave me the advice about it being unwise if we decided to separate, that was actually helpful, we’ll have to talk it over more.

Also, I thought it was only scandalous if it was known that it was a Catholic doing it and it was bringing drama on Catholicism as a whole. idk how the tax/public records people would know my religion unless I told them.

We are suppose to be witnesses to the faith all the time. They should know you are catholic by your conduct alone.

 

[Schluns]

Rather than move to a ‘same sex marriage’ state, and enter into any sort of “marriage” that breaks God’s covenant on marriage. Why not set each other up as medical/financial advocates, and living wills in the case of either one of you being suddenly incapacitated? You can do that in any state of the union. This would help protect the two of you in case of emergency. These documents should also have a substitute, perhaps a family member from each side.

Any property should be put into a trust rather than a will. As a Catholic, neither one of you should be supporting same sex marriage in any way, especially not by entering into one. Especially since there are other binding legal agreements that would serve the two of you better. Without children, there really are no significant tax breaks anyway. (I am not suggesting anything)

 

[StCsDavid]

So one of my friends and I (we’re both women) are close enough that we’d be glad to live together for the rest of our lives once I’m finished with school. I suppose you could call it a “Boston marriage”, if they called it that these days

Imagining we settled down in a state that recognizes same-sex marriages or “domestic partnerships”, would it be all right that we get married to take advantage of the legal conveniences? We wouldn’t be going out and trying to pretend we had a sacramental marriage (we’re both Catholic), just having our “live in the same house, each other’s legal primary point of contact etc.” arrangement down on legal papers for our own safety.

In a sense it is kind of along the same lines of why we Catholic don’t receive communion in Protestant churches. How we live out the Gospel matters. Lex orandi, lex credendi, lex vivendi. “We pray what we believe and that is how we live.”

There are plenty of legal ways to achieve what you and your friend desire without contributing to the mockery of marriage this current day’s culture puts forward.

 

[Rolltide]

I never really watched the show, but essentially, your scenario was the plot for the series finale episode of Boston Legal.

 

[Kevin42]

So one of my friends and I (we’re both women) are close enough that we’d be glad to live together for the rest of our lives once I’m finished with school. I suppose you could call it a “Boston marriage”, if they called it that these days

Imagining we settled down in a state that recognizes same-sex marriages or “domestic partnerships”, would it be all right that we get married to take advantage of the legal conveniences? We wouldn’t be going out and trying to pretend we had a sacramental marriage (we’re both Catholic), just having our “live in the same house, each other’s legal primary point of contact etc.” arrangement down on legal papers for our own safety.

So could my best friend and I get married? We are best friends, and we love each other very much. We don’t engage in sexual relations. We are both men with homosexual tendencies. Still, it’s basically the same thing as you would be doing.

The answer is absolutely not. Marriage gives us a glimpse of God, it is a (imperfect) symbol of The Trinity and Trinitarian love. Furthermore, God found it so holy that he made it a sacrament. It has unfortunately been desecrated so much in our society, that we don’t need to add to the desecration.

 

[JimG]

So could my best friend and I get married? We are best friends, and we love each other very much. We don’t engage in sexual relations. We are both men with homosexual tendencies. Still, it’s basically the same thing as you would be doing.

The answer is absolutely not. Marriage gives us a glimpse of God, it is a (imperfect) symbol of The Trinity and Trinitarian love. Furthermore, God found it so holy that he made it a sacrament. It has unfortunately been desecrated so much in our society, that we don’t need to add to the desecration.

Yes, the answer is absolutely not, according to the laws of reality.

But, in a state which has legalized same sex marriage, it seems to me that there could be no legal impediment to any two individuals getting married, regardless of sexual orientation, or lack thereof, or gender, or sexual relations or the absence thereof, or affection or no affection. Equal protection under the law, is the byword, and no discrimination.

 

[quiet52]

It’s also a lie.

Do you not want to please God first and foremost? That would not be the case if you decide you and your friend want to live in a perpetual lie.

 

[ladybri77]

To whoever it was that gave me the advice about it being unwise if we decided to separate, that was actually helpful, we’ll have to talk it over more.

Same-sex marriage is condemned because the people who get married like that normally want to be seen as the exact same thing as a regular married couple. We don’t. As I’ve said before, we’re not interested in this being public, and if I didn’t say it before, we’re not a lesbian couple.

Also, I thought it was only scandalous if it was known that it was a Catholic doing it and it was bringing drama on Catholicism as a whole. idk how the tax/public records people would know my religion unless I told them.

What in the world does this have to do with anything? As I said above, we’re not lesbians.

What if you met a man you really wanted to marry?

 

[ladybri77]

Yes, the answer is absolutely not, according to the laws of reality.

But, in a state which has legalized same sex marriage, it seems to me that there could be no legal impediment to any two individuals getting married, regardless of sexual orientation, or lack thereof, or gender, or sexual relations or the absence thereof, or affection or no affection. Equal protection under the law, is the byword, and no discrimination.

Or any two combinations, brother/sister, cousin/cousin, uncle/niece, etc. The institution of marriage has been so desecrated that heck anything goes!

 

[ladybri77]

So could my best friend and I get married? We are best friends, and we love each other very much. We don’t engage in sexual relations. We are both men with homosexual tendencies. Still, it’s basically the same thing as you would be doing.

The answer is absolutely not. Marriage gives us a glimpse of God, it is a (imperfect) symbol of The Trinity and Trinitarian love. Furthermore, God found it so holy that he made it a sacrament. It has unfortunately been desecrated so much in our society, that we don’t need to add to the desecration.

Praying for you, Kevin.