More women converting to Islam than men

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Ma.Eugenia

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****Someone told me recently that majority of converts to Islam are women.

This greatly disturbed me.

Why is it that women are more prone to convert to Islam than men?
 
Like the song says: “Some of them want to abuse you; some of them want to be abused.”
 
I wonder if it has more to do with the general approach of the genders. Women are more likely to approach the issue from an emotional standpoint. If they feel respected, then they are respected. If they feel love, then they are more likely to adjust their thoughts to say they are receiving love. It provides a clear, conservative, and unapologetic difference to popular American culture. They are more likely, on average, to overlook those areas which are possible negatives which are not affecting them at the time as long as they are feeling loved, supported, uplifted, etc.

Men, on the other hand, might be more likely to dismiss the possibility out of hand. Their thoughts are more likely to shape their feelings. They are less likely to date a Muslim woman because there is an obvious cultural/religious difference from the start (based on her dress) than there is with a woman who is considering dating a Muslim man.

Just some possibilities.
 
You’ll find that there are some women who are converting it for ‘spiritual’ reasons as they were dissatisfied with other religions or had been abused in the past and feel the psychological need to be wrapped in a ‘secure’ theology and way of life.

Some women convert because they are psychological susceptible to domination and want a religion to which they can arrogate all responsibility.

But by far the majority of women converts do so because of marriage - it’s the “Shaykh of Arabi” syndrome.
 
PaulDupre said:
Like the song says: “Some of them want to abuse you; some of them want to be abused.”
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Dude, sweet dreams are so not made of Islam.

I want to make a crack about how this means women can never insult men’s intelligence again, but somehow it feels wrong. There are some patterns of behavior you can’t even make fun of. Codependents are one. This (not coincidentally, being much the same thing) is another.
 
Woodstock said:
I wonder if it has more to do with the general approach of the genders. Women are more likely to approach the issue from an emotional standpoint. If they feel respected, then they are respected. If they feel love, then they are more likely to adjust their thoughts to say they are receiving love. It provides a clear, conservative, and unapologetic difference to popular American culture. They are more likely, on average, to overlook those areas which are possible negatives which are not affecting them at the time as long as they are feeling loved, supported, uplifted, etc.

Men, on the other hand, might be more likely to dismiss the possibility out of hand. Their thoughts are more likely to shape their feelings. They are less likely to date a Muslim woman because there is an obvious cultural/religious difference from the start (based on her dress) than there is with a woman who is considering dating a Muslim man.

Just some possibilities.
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That is a good observation.

I would imagine the number of non-muslim men who would approach a muslim woman are very small, especially if they have a scarf on. The culture differences would be too big.

On the otherhand, Id bet plenty of muslim men have no problem approaching non-muslim women. Women, especially non religious wouldnt mind the religious difference as much and would be more interested in personality.
 
Rodrigo_Bivar said:
You’ll find that there are some women who are converting it for ‘spiritual’ reasons as they were dissatisfied with other religions or had been abused in the past and feel the psychological need to be wrapped in a ‘secure’ theology and way of life.

Some women convert because they are psychological susceptible to domination and want a religion to which they can arrogate all responsibility.

But by far the majority of women converts do so because of marriage - it’s the “Shaykh of Arabi” syndrome.
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What is this “Shaykh of Arbi syndrome”?
 
I just made up the “Shaykh of Arabi” syndrome in reference to the old black-n-white silent movies by Valentino where the Arab (or Muslim) males is romanticized. I personally know several ex-Muslim women who married Muslim males out of romanticized views only to regret their decision when Islamic reality hits them.

I asked them why they married these misogynistic women-dominating Muslims when there are perfectly good non-Muslim males around. Their answer is always the same - the Muslim males seemed fun and decent guys - until they got married and things changed and their Islamic natures started to manifest themselves.

These Muslim males also portray Islam as a wonderful positive religion (i.e. Muhammad was the greatest human being ever, Islam is the religion of peace, tolerance etc.) until they got married to their Western wives. Then a green card or two later, their tunes changed.

“I don’t like you working anymore. You shouldn’t be working among the filthy kufars.”

“I don’t want you to see your relatives anymore - they are filthy kufars.”

“You must have my permission to go outside the house. God has made me superior to you.”

“I want you to wear the hijab. I dislike the way you dress like whores.”

That sort of thing never came up before marriage. Ergo - the “Shaykh of Arabi” syndrome.
 
Ma.Eugenia said:
****Someone told me recently that majority of converts to Islam are women.

This greatly disturbed me.

Why is it that women are more prone to convert to Islam than men?
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In Islam you’re allowed to lie to spread the faith. Many women are approached with half-truths about Islam. They’re told that Islam is a religion of ‘mutual obligations’ which is true, to a degree, but doesn’t say that these are obligations of equal partners, just that each partner is equally obliged.

Further there’s a general portrayal of Islam as the ‘victim’ faith.
 
Hello everyone!

Thanks for your replies.

Regarding what **Woodstock **said here:
I wonder if it has more to do with the general approach of the genders. Women are more likely to approach the issue from an emotional standpoint. If they feel respected, then they are respected. If they feel love, then they are more likely to adjust their thoughts to say they are receiving love. It provides a clear, conservative, and unapologetic difference to popular American culture.They are more likely, on average, to overlook those areas which are possible negatives which are not affecting them at the time as long as they are feeling loved, supported, uplifted, etc…
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I think you have a point here.

I agree that being loved, supported and uplifted is important for us women.

I have experienced going out with Catholic men and people of different religions, in particular, Muslims. It might be a purely personal experience (and may not apply to all), but I did notice that there was a difference in the way Catholic men and non-Catholic men I’ve met, act around Catholic women.

For example, the Protestants and Muslims I met (I am not saying all are like this) seem to value chastity a lot and they respect it.

The Muslim men (Protestants too) tend to present a more caring and respectful persona around me that is very attractive and stands out in comparison to how I was being treated by the Catholic guys I went out with.

Not that I am saying Catholic men cannot be like that, as I do have a Catholic man I look up to–my dad–who is caring and respectful to his family. Perhaps, that is the reason why despite the attractiveness of being pursued by a good,respectful Muslim man, I couldn’t give way to agreeing because I know that it will mean conversion to Islam and by far, my Catholic faith is my “pearl of great price”.

I get asked a lot, “You live in a Catholic country and you cannot find one good Catholic guy to go out with?” (This is regarding my propensity to go out with non-Catholics)

Also, perhaps, I am meeting the “wrong” Catholic men and meeting the “right” Muslim men. I know enough to say that there there are good and bad people on both sides—so I am in no way, generalizing, that all on one side is good or bad.

In a way having a Catholic man I admire (again, my dad) helps make the decision easier to say “no” and not write off all men in my religion as a lost cause.

There is the wish, of course, that more Catholic men live out their faith more and value and treasure the women in their lives and be respectful of the women they meet.

My idea is, if women feel treasured and valued, why would they want to leave?

Regarding what **Dale_M **said:
Perhaps because women tend to take religion more seriously?
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I am not so sure if lack of Christian faith (or knowledge of it) that has lead some women to leave Christianity for Islam.

In my case…I stayed put because I felt I have something more of value to me : my faith.

By the way, thanks for the interesting site you cited in your reply.

Regarding what **Rodrigo Bivar **said:
I just made up the “Shaykh of Arabi” syndrome in reference to the old black-n-white silent movies by Valentino where the Arab (or Muslim) males is romanticized. I personally know several ex-Muslim women who married Muslim males out of romanticized views only to regret their decision when Islamic reality hits them.
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“Shayk of Arabi” syndrome…that’s new. 😃

I think you have a point here, though.

Do not underestimate romanceas it has a big drawing power for conversion to other religions. Women, like me, tend to see their beloved and everything he stands for in a positive way, while putting on “blinders” on the negatives.

Regarding what **CatholicDude **said:
On the otherhand, Id bet plenty of muslim men have no problem approaching non-muslim women. Women, especially non religious wouldnt mind the religious difference as much and would be more interested in personality.
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Good point.

I noticed that with the Muslim men I met.

While I go out with Muslim men …I keep it only on a friendly basis as **I do mind the religious differences **but I think they are still good, decent people who I can be friends with.

Its sad that some women tend not to put much value in their Catholic or Christian faith.

Regarding what **Hastrman **said:
**There are some patterns of behavior you can’t even make fun of. Codependents are one. **
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What do you mean about codependent?

Sorry, I don’t understand this much. :confused:

Regarding what **PaulDupre **said:
"Some of them want to abuse you; some of them want to be abused."
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I think nobody ever wants to be abused.

Please explain further. :confused:

Anyway, thanks, everyone, for your replies.🙂
 
I believe that it is human nature to value what is more difficult over what is easy to attain do. Modern Christians sometimes forget this and assume that religion should be brought in line with secular practices. So, ironically, by attempting to be everything to everyone-proabortion, conception, lack of rules-very liberal churches become unappealing. I"ve heard, although I don’t know if its true, that more traditional churches often have higher membership.

I have no desire to be Muslim, but I could see that some people might find Islam, with its hard and fast rules and definite stand on issues, to be appealing.
 
Ma.Eugenia said:
Would you explain this further, please?

Are Muslims really told that they are allowed to lie for their faith?
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It’s more correct to say “In Islam you’re allowed to lie”.

Called al-Takeyya or al-Taqiyya. One can lie in Islam as shown with Muhammed’s own example…
Volume 5, Book 59, Number 369:

Narrated Jabir bin 'Abdullah:

Allah’s Apostle said, “Who is willing to kill Ka’b bin Al-Ashraf who has hurt Allah and His Apostle?” Thereupon Muhammad bin Maslama got up saying, “O Allah’s Apostle! Would you like that I kill him?” The Prophet said, “Yes,” Muhammad bin Maslama said, **"Then allow me to say a (false) thing (i.e. to deceive Kab). "The Prophet said, “You may say it.” **Then Muhammad bin Maslama went to Kab and said, “That man (i.e. Muhammad demands Sadaqa (i.e. Zakat) from us, and he has troubled us, and I have come to borrow something from you.” On that, Kab said, “By Allah, you will get tired of him!” Muhammad bin Maslama said, “Now as we have followed him, we do not want to leave him unless and until we see how his end is going to be. Now we want you to lend us a camel load or two of food.” (Some difference between narrators about a camel load or two.) Kab said, “Yes, (I will lend you), but you should mortgage something to me.” Muhammad bin Mas-lama and his companion said, “What do you want?” Ka’b replied, “Mortgage your women to me.” They said, “How can we mortgage our women to you and you are the most handsome of the 'Arabs?” Ka’b said, “Then mortgage your sons to me.” They said, “How can we mortgage our sons to you? Later they would be abused by the people’s saying that so-and-so has been mortgaged for a camel load of food. That would cause us great disgrace, but we will mortgage our arms to you.” Muhammad bin Maslama and his companion promised Kab that Muhammad would return to him. He came to Kab at night along with Kab’s foster brother, Abu Na’ila. Kab invited them to come into his fort, and then he went down to them. His wife asked him, “Where are you going at this time?” Kab replied, “None but Muhammad bin Maslama and my (foster) brother Abu Na’ila have come.” His wife said, “I hear a voice as if dropping blood is from him, Ka’b said. “They are none but my brother Muhammad bin Maslama and my foster brother Abu Naila. A generous man should respond to a call at night even if invited to be killed.” Muhammad bin Maslama went with two men. (Some narrators mention the men as 'Abu bin Jabr. Al Harith bin Aus and Abbad bin Bishr). So Muhammad bin Maslama went in together with two men, and sail to them, “When Ka’b comes, I will touch his hair and smell it, and when you see that I have got hold of his head, strip him. I will let you smell his head.” Kab bin Al-Ashraf came down to them wrapped in his clothes, and diffusing perfume. Muhammad bin Maslama said. " have never smelt a better scent than this. Ka’b replied. “I have got the best 'Arab women who know how to use the high class of perfume.” Muhammad bin Maslama requested Ka’b “Will you allow me to smell your head?” Ka’b said, “Yes.” Muhammad smelt it and made his companions smell it as well. Then he requested Ka’b again, “Will you let me (smell your head)?” Ka’b said, “Yes.” When Muhammad got a strong hold of him, he said (to his companions), “Get at him!” So they killed him and went to the Prophet and informed him. (Abu Rafi) was killed after Ka’b bin Al-Ashraf.”
usc.edu/dept/MSA/fundamentals/hadithsunnah/bukhari/059.sbt.html#005.059.369
 
A classic bit of Islamic propaganda is the use of the half-truth.

A Moslem might tell you that ‘jihad’ means not ‘Holy War’ but struggle. Technically this is true, but as one can struggle by ‘Holy War’ then it is not exclusive to the term ‘jihad’. All the major Islamic schools think Jihad through warfare is legitimate in spreading Islam.

Another is that in the Koran there’s the verse “There shall be no compulsion in religion”. The verse* is *there, but it’s been abrogated (superseded) by more bellicose verses. This is why Islam requires the death penalty for all who become apostate (those who leave Islam; given three warnings first, to return, or they’re executed - surely a ‘compulsion’)

Recently I had an on-line debate with a local Moslem apologist Keysar Trad, on a blog provided by Sydney’s Daily Telegraph’s on-line news service. He talked about how well treated subject people were under Islam. I questioned him on this. He replied that non-Moslems did not have to pay the ‘tithe’ called the Zakat. I replied that this was a half-truth. True, to the point that the Zakat (calculated at 2.5%) was not required of non-Moslems, but they had to pay another tax instead, calculated at 10%, called the Jizya! (as required by Koran 9:29 - see below). That such a person as he would give only half the information amounts to an un-truth.

The Jizya…
Surah At-Taubah

Ayah [29]
Fight against those who (1) believe not in Allah, (2) nor in the Last Day, (3) nor forbid that which has been forbidden by Allah and His Messenger (4) and those who acknowledge not the religion of truth (i.e. Islam) among the people of the Scripture (Jews and Christians), until they pay the Jizyah with willing submission, and feel themselves subdued.

That is, fight against them and kill those, unless they surrender to Islam, or submit to Islamic authority and agree to pay the Jizyah.
 
I wouldn’t put the reason of women converting to Islam merely on “the desire of being dominated”. That’s a bit easy I think, especially as I’ve seen quite a lot of educated Muslim women who seemed very sure of themselves and were certainly not oppressed slaves of men.

I think the main reason is a basic uneasiness about the roles of men and women in today’s secular culture. People are not sure about their roles anymore, and there is at the same time a lot of pressure to conform to the expectations. I guess that’s the point where educated women, who don’t know about the ideas of Christianity (and especially of Catholicism - see the Theology of the Body!) on the role of the sexes, turn to Islam, to have at last clear and defined roles. Maybe some of them experience this as a liberation - because they have received a half-truth that is still truer than the falsehood of the secular world and media.

In fact, I would see such conversions as a clarion call for us Christians/Catholics: we have to show women and men their true purpose, their true roles in life - with the examples of Christ, the BVM and all the saints.

As to Muslim men interested in non-Muslim women: according to Islam law and custom, Muslim men have the right to marry non-Muslim women (though these may be then at least expected to convert to Islam), while Muslim women must not marry non-Muslim men.
 
Several Muslim women compare the secular purience of American society with the relative modesty of Islamic practice and find Islam to be superior. In this area I do as well.

Some say that wearing the hijab takes a woman off of the meat market. Others say that it isn’t safe for a woman to walk down the streets of America especially at night whereas in Ammon it is perfectly safe.

CDL
 
orignally posted by Ma.Eugenia
The Muslim men (Protestants too) tend to present a more caring and respectful persona around me that is very attractive and stands out in comparison to how I was being treated by the Catholic guys I went out with.
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My daughter was married to a muslim man for a short time. Initially he treated her with great respect when dating. Also my daughter likes romance. In Saint Teresa of Avila book “Way to Perfection”, one of the things that she speaks against is romance novels. In the sixteen century, they were a big item; her mother read them and she cautions all not to read them.Hollywood lives on romance.

Her husband at the time told me he could marry four times as they follow the tradition of Abraham. I don’t believe he meant at the same time and I don’t think most women realize this is a part of their faith doctrine as in the American culture they play it down saying well, most are only married once.

Also I have just read that they don’t believe in “free will”.
 
Most women want to stop being treated like sex objects. Most men want to keep treating women like sex objects.

Therefore, Islam will appeal to more women than men.
 
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