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maryjk
Guest
Couldn’t have said it better myself.
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Listener
Guest
After spending many years in the workforce doing detail work, this is the best advice I can give:
Show up for work on time. Be pleasant to everyone that you meet. Notice how they dress for work, and make sure that you dress in a similar way. Don’t wear nicer clothes than the boss wears.
Get a 3-ring binder and fill it with notes. Make notes of what you’re told, and keep a diary of what you’re doing. It is probably best to take notes by hand so they don’t appear on the computer you use at work.
Try to make it look like you’re excited about your new job. Don’t get into personality conflicts with anyone.
It seems like it used to take me a week just to figure out how all of the people fit in and where the bathrooms and conference rooms were located.
I think it would take at least three months before you could consider yourself an expert at any job, unless the job is a complete no-brainer.
As far as co-workers are concerned, these are the same people that you get frustrated with when you’re driving down the road. Why would it be any different at work? Trying to change these people is like trying to change the person who sits at a green light for a few minutes when he should be moving.
Where are all of the people who grew up in dysfunctional families? Guess what, they are at work trying to make a living.
Just relax, do your best, and go with the flow!
Show up for work on time. Be pleasant to everyone that you meet. Notice how they dress for work, and make sure that you dress in a similar way. Don’t wear nicer clothes than the boss wears.
Get a 3-ring binder and fill it with notes. Make notes of what you’re told, and keep a diary of what you’re doing. It is probably best to take notes by hand so they don’t appear on the computer you use at work.
Try to make it look like you’re excited about your new job. Don’t get into personality conflicts with anyone.
It seems like it used to take me a week just to figure out how all of the people fit in and where the bathrooms and conference rooms were located.
I think it would take at least three months before you could consider yourself an expert at any job, unless the job is a complete no-brainer.
As far as co-workers are concerned, these are the same people that you get frustrated with when you’re driving down the road. Why would it be any different at work? Trying to change these people is like trying to change the person who sits at a green light for a few minutes when he should be moving.
Where are all of the people who grew up in dysfunctional families? Guess what, they are at work trying to make a living.
Just relax, do your best, and go with the flow!
LaughingBoy1503
Well-known member
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Anglewannabe
Guest
Sadly, my handwriting is horrible, I can’t even understand it the next day. I would change that to keeping notes at home where no one can find them. These would be legal requirements and I would document the source I got them from for credibility.
Anything anyone emails me, I keep the email so I have back up of where I got it
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DeniseNY
Guest
For most of us, there comes a time where we really have to start to look inward for the source of a lot of our problems, rather than outwards. That’s the only way we can truly move forward and grow. Otherwise, we keep running into the same situations and wondering why it keeps happening to us.
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Anglewannabe
Guest
Yes, I agree with that. I am slowly working towards that with trusted people. I was more looking for immediate advice because I can not wait for my emotional healing to be done. I need to handle situations at work properly NOW
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DeniseNY
Guest
As other posters have very rightfully advised, you have to chill out about these issues. That’s how you handle it.
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Hoosier_Daddy
Guest
I am disappointed to read this. Angie, Do you think some therapy could help with your interactions with others?M…pas.
1-) She started 2 weeks before me and was asked to show me some things. All she did was sit beside me with a file folder full of hard copy emails and said ‘This came in from Vancouver’ and turned the page. This came in from a manager, and went on to the next page. When I said 'What am I suppose to do with it, she said ‘I don’t know but I am suppose to show you’I just sat there and listened and asked if I could please read the emails so I could have an idea of what types of request I could get. She kept ‘telling’ me with authority in her voice what they were, but not once told me what to do. Again, I said nothing and listened. As time is going on, there are other people I can ask and ways I can piece it together myself. However, I shake in my boots every time she comes over to show me something. My concern is, the free ride will end soon and I will not be able to just listen. Management will expect action from me and she is clearly not giving direction. How do I handle this?
2-) The work is slowly being transferred over to head office. This is making the transition easy because I only have to learn one block of business at a time. Yeah ! Our manager keeps saying ‘Once everything is transferred over, we will decide who does what.’ Well, Susan and I each have a block of business. I suggested to her that for now, since we each spent a lot of time learning our block perhaps we can keep them until year end (which is busy time) will be over. She immediately agreed ! Yeah again. Then I said ‘after six month then perhaps we could trade a block at a time’. She interrupted me mid sentence got really defensive and said ‘NO’. She went on and on about how after learning something, she does not want to have to learn again. She even went so far as to say there is one lady in one branch who will not let anyone see her work and even head office does not have access to it and that is what she wants. That no one sees her work. I just listened. What upsets me is I want to learn as much as possible and if she is not willing to trade blocks of business at some point, that cuts my opportunities in half. I tried to polite explain my point of view point she would not hear it. Again I listened but I must admit on the inside I was feeling like there was no room for me to have a different opinion and she was trying to convince me of hers. So I said ‘Susan, I think we need to agree to disagree. I respect your opinion and if you don’t want to trade then we won’t trade. I just need to know that my opinion is respected as well’. She said of course I was respected and then just continued to try to convince me of hers. I listened and then said ‘fair enough’ and went to work. I have decided I will drop the issue for now and if in 6 months I still feel it is a good idea, I will bring it to my manager and let him decide. My concern is if ever we need to make a compromise, she will insist on having her way. How do I act like a team player without being her ‘yes’ woman?
3-) There is a person 2000 miles away that use to do my job. I send her a lot of emails with questions. She is very helpful and knowledgeable. The problem is, because it is email often things get misunderstood and it is frustrating. Also, I am VERY appreciative for everything this lady does. However, I need a lot more information and help that she is giving me. This is because I am new and I really have no idea how some things are done. Because this lady is SO good to me, I don’t want to push more than I am so often I put my questions aside and only ‘disturb’ her with a small fraction of what I need everyday. But again, my concern is the free ride will be over and management will expect me to know things she has not had time to train me on yet. Again, how do I handle this?
4-) When we don’t know how to do something, very often, we will look at what happened 2 months ago, figure out what they did and repeat the process. This is a good way to get it done fast. However, some things are in a contract and we are suppose to follow the official contract. I would like to have a copy of the contract or know where the clause is. In case we are audited, I think being able to pull out a written contract pulls a lot more weight than instructions in an email (that anyone could have written) or simple saying ‘this is how it was always done’. Whenever I ask for a copy of a contract, people look at me as if I am speaking a foreign language. I have a real hard time believing we do not have these things in writing with customers. After all, they must have agreed to some terms before doing business with us. Again, how do I handle this? Do I just not worry about the contract and hope I am never audited
Again, things are going really well at my new job. I just want advice on these issues BEFORE I do something I regret
Angie
I hope you can change the trajectory in this new job. But that change will have to come from within and with a degree of self awareness that might be foreign to you.
I hope your new job and your interactions with others goes well. I really do.
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GreyWings
Guest
It’s a new job. You’re dealing with the new. With each job, there will be stress, and personalities that you don’t quite get. But over time, you may be surprised that Susan could very well become an ally and trusted colleague in the future.
Try to see the good in the novelty of it all. Roll with the punches. Show Susan some grace as she is new, too. Try not to worry so much about the future and future projects, take it a day at a time
Try to see the good in the novelty of it all. Roll with the punches. Show Susan some grace as she is new, too. Try not to worry so much about the future and future projects, take it a day at a time
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EasterJoy
Guest
That’s why they pay management the big bucks: to make decisions. Your job includes gaining a sense of what to ask about and what not to ask about. Make these judgments based on the “I wish you had asked about that when the question could do some good” litmus test, as well as you can. You are new, so questions are expected now.
Keep track of verbal conversations you have had, too, organized by topic, so you know what you’ve asked about and what answer you got from who and when. That way, you’re not left with, “Well, I asked someone some question about that sometime and they said something like…” or “gee, I know we talked about this, but I can’t remember exactly what he/she said.” As time passes, memories fade. You’ll find it handy (and probably comforting) to know what others told you to remember and when they said it. (Paper was invented so what became the “scribe class” wouldn’t have to keep everything in their heads.)
Keep in mind, however, that anything written down can be read by people who were not intended to read it. Be very polite in how you refer to everyone any time you commit a thought to paper, do not commit overly sensitive information to paper except in a cryptic way that only you can pin down, and do not give any ammunition in your own hand that might condemn you later. Your personal diary of frustrations ought to always be at home, kept in a spot where you have an expectation of privacy, where no one at work can access it.
By the way–I think you’ve gotten some excellent advice, above. Take it seriously, it will help you out.
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