Truth, here are three books I think you may find helpful. I’m sure you’re already reading and praying a lot, so I’ll just leave these here:
The Apostasy That Wasn’t: The Extraordinary Story of the Unbreakable Early Church
**"With the touch of a master storyteller, Rod Bennett narrates the drama of the early Church s fight to preserve Christian orthodoxy intact even as powerful forces try to smash it to pieces. The theory goes like this: Just a few centuries after Christ s death, around the time the Roman Empire converted to Christianity, the true Faith suffered a catastrophic falling-away. The simple truths of the gospel became so obscured by worldliness and pagan idolatry kicking off the Dark Ages of Catholicism that Christianity required a complete reboot.
This idea of a Great Apostasy is one of the cornerstones of American Protestantism, along with Mormonism, the Jehovah s Witnesses, and even Islam. Countless millions today profess a faith built on the assumption that the early Church quickly became broken beyond repair, requiring some new prophet or reformer to restore the pure teaching of Jesus and the apostles. This theory is popular… but it s also fiction.
In The Apostasy that Wasn’t, Rod Bennett follows up his bestseller Four Witnesses with an account of the historical events that led him out of his own belief in apostasy theory and into the Catholic Church. With the touch of a master storyteller, he narrates the drama of the early Church s fight to preserve Christian orthodoxy intact even as powerful forces try to smash it to pieces. Amid imperial intrigue, military menace, and bitter theological debate, a hero arises in the form of a homely little monk named Athanasius, who stands against the world to prove that there could never be a Great Apostasy because Jesus promised his Church would never be broken."**
Four Witnesses: The Early Church in Her Own Words
"What was the early Church like? Contrary to popular belief, Rod Bennett shows there is a reliable way to know. Four ancient Christian writers–four witnesses to early Christianity --left us an extensive body of documentation on this vital subject, and this book brings their fascinating testimony to life for modern believers. With all the power and drama of a gripping novel, this book is a journey of discovery of ancient and beautiful truths through the lives of four great saints of the early Church–Clement of Rome, Ignatius of Antioch, Justin Martyr, and Irenaeus of Lyons."
Handed Down: The Catholic Faith of the Early Christians
**"Most Protestants believe that there s a great contrast between modern Catholicism and first-centuries Christianity. But in this exploration of history and early theological writings, Papandrea (a former Protestant minister) shows that there s actually a stunning similarity. In Handed Down: The Catholic Faith of the Early Christians, James L. Papandrea (Seven Revolutions) examines that most crucial era in the transmission of Christian truth: the time of the early Church.
During those few centuries following the apostolic age, the brilliant and holy pastors, teachers, and writers known as the Church Fathers took the gospel they received and developed the doctrines and practices that defined the Christian religion. And that religion of the Fathers continues today faithfully kept, vibrant and alive in the Catholic Church. The essence of Christianity is this: we hold fast to what we were given by those who came before us. From Jesus and the apostles to believers throughout history, God s saving revelation has been proclaimed, preserved, and passed on, each generation not inventing the Faith for itself but staying true to the tradition it received.
Papandrea demonstrates that the early Christians were decisively Catholic in how they acted and what they believed in, including: -The authority of the Church and Sacred Tradition in addition to Scripture -The sacraments, including the Real Presence of Christ in the Eucharist -An ecclesial hierarchy with priests, bishops, and a pope -A theology of salvation that included the importance of works and free will -Prayers and devotions to the saints and the Blessed Virgin Mary More than a compilation of Patristic prooftexts (important though these are), Handed Down offers a fascinating window into the life of the early Church and the lessons it holds for us today. It’s perfect for history-conscious Protestants looking for a friendly defense of Catholic belief, as well as for Catholics who want to deepen their connection with our forefathers in the Faith."**