Mortal Sin and Holy Communion

[spsteve]

good day,

if one is engage in mortal sin and is not aware is it a sacrilage

if one masturbates what are the likely ways that can help such person to stop

thank you

 

[EasterJoy]

I attended Mass for a couple of years without receiving Communion because I was living in a state of grave sin according to the Church. That being living with someone outside marriage.

I couldn’t go to Confession because I had no intention of not living with this person. Actually, I didn’t see it as such a huge deal but I bow to the Church’s rules.

Eventually, I stopped going to Mass for a few years.

Recently, came back into the fold and am in kind of a similar situation but with a different perspective.

I missed several Masses and until I can get to Confession, I can’t receive Communion. I went to Mass last weekend and did not receive Communion. I was the only person in the congregation who didn’t which I found interesting. But that’s neither here nor there.

At any rate, I wondered if there was even a point in going to Mass if you can’t receive Communion. I did it for years before and didn’t have a problem with it. But now it seems kind of pointless. I feel kind of bereft not going to Communion. In the past, it didn’t bother me at all.

Or is it just compounding the original sin of missing Mass? I’m confused.

Btw, I think I can finally get to Confession this weekend of the weather forecast is right which is always iffy.

Catholics have an obligation to go to Mass every Sunday and Holy Day of Obligation, and being in a state of mortal sin doesn’t remove the obligation. OTOH, Catholics are also bound to confess any mortal sins no less than once a year, and must receive Holy Communion at least once during every Easter season. So those are the rules. There isn’t a service plan that accommodates years of refusal to repentance.

Having said that…I think that unless someone is so cynical and unbelieving and not going for any charitable reason that just being at Mass could be fairly called a sacrilege–I can’t imagine anyone in that position even asking the question, unless they only went in order to keep some standing in the community by faking faith, or some nonsense like that–it is better to go, even if one is not Catholic. The Mass is the source and summit of the Christian life, and could be the source of grace that leads to conversion, even if one is not in full communion with the Church. So for a person who’s asking “should I keep coming?”, the answer is usually yes. It’s better to repent, but it is better to drag one’s lack of repentance to Mass week after week than to take that lack of repentance someplace where it can exist unmolested.

 

[GoneAstray]

Catholics have an obligation to go to Mass every Sunday and Holy Day of Obligation, and being in a state of mortal sin doesn’t remove the obligation. OTOH, Catholics are also bound to confess any mortal sins no less than once a year, and must receive Holy Communion at least once during every Easter season. So those are the rules. There isn’t a service plan that accommodates years of refusal to repentance.

Having said that…I think that unless someone is so cynical and unbelieving and not going for any charitable reason that just being at Mass could be fairly called a sacrilege–I can’t imagine anyone in that position even asking the question, unless they only went in order to keep some standing in the community by faking faith, or some nonsense like that–it is better to go, even if one is not Catholic. The Mass is the source and summit of the Christian life, and could be the source of grace that leads to conversion, even if one is not in full communion with the Church. So for a person who’s asking “should I keep coming?”, the answer is usually yes. It’s better to repent, but it is better to drag one’s lack of repentance to Mass week after week than to take that lack of repentance someplace where it can exist unmolested.

I am not sure I understand what you are saying here. So forgive me if my post sounds a little brusque.

I went to Confession and I had a long talk with the priest who seemed a lot more understanding and a whole lot less dogmatic than your response indicates you are.

I did what I needed to do and I have made it to Mass every weekend since then. I have received absolution and I fully intend to keep attending Mass unless there are legitimate reasons that I can’t.

If you are referring to the fact that I lived with someone and still went to Mass but not Confession, I seriously doubt that I am the first or will be the last person to do that.

The bottom line is that only the person and the priest can look at the circumstances and decide if it is a serious sin or not.

 

[EasterJoy]

I am not sure I understand what you are saying here. So forgive me if my post sounds a little brusque.

I went to Confession and I had a long talk with the priest who seemed a lot more understanding and a whole lot less dogmatic than your response indicates you are.

I did what I needed to do and I have made it to Mass every weekend since then. I have received absolution and I fully intend to keep attending Mass unless there are legitimate reasons that I can’t.

If you are referring to the fact that I lived with someone and still went to Mass but not Confession, I seriously doubt that I am the first or will be the last person to do that.

The bottom line is that only the person and the priest can look at the circumstances and decide if it is a serious sin or not.

You aren’t being brusque, and I don’t mean to be, either.

I think you don’t understand what I’m saying here. I’m saying there are objective moral laws–that is, there is an objective measure of what is and isn’t a grave matter. Choosing to live with someone who is not your spouse as if they were your spouse is a grave matter. Always was, still is. Have I done something similar? Oh, yes. You aren’t the first, you won’t be the last, neither was I, but I still look back and think, “What was I thinking?” It was wrong, I shouldn’t have done it. God’s way was the better way, as in the difference between night and day. I would do you wrong if I were to gloss over that, even though you don’t seem to be saying anything otherwise.

Having said that, that a choice is gravely wrong in an objective sense is not the end of the matter. You are right about that. I don’t just mean that there are other questions that go to appreciation of gravity and whether the person has the self-control to do otherwise: that is, is it a mortal sin? I mean that confessors also look at what is the most likely course to end the situation, rather than make it worse. If you go to a doctor with a terrible tumor, there are times when there needs to be some treatment before surgery. He won’t always just say, “Wait here, I’m going to go down the hall and get the surgeon, you’re having this thing out right now”…and I don’t just mean that the patient would probably be in the parking lot before the door closed behind the doctor. So even if it is objectively a mortal sin (and your priest discerns that, not me), the priest has to decide what the most likely way is to get the penitent out of it. That is beyond my job description, you are right about that, too. Even the physicians have their disagreements, and this is a case where I never “went to medical school”, let alone practiced medicine.

Even the simple can know, though, that it is far better to go to Mass while in a situation like that than not to, even if it goes on for years. You did the right thing. Would you have done better to end the situation sooner? Yes, and I would, too. But going to Mass is a great grace towards that, in all but a very few unusual situations, as long as the person refrains from recieving the Eucharist when they are aware of being in an objectively grave situation. Yes, you absolutely did the right thing. Keep going to Mass and thirsting for God. That won’t ever steer you wrong.

 

[benedictgal]

I attended Mass for a couple of years without receiving Communion because I was living in a state of grave sin according to the Church. That being living with someone outside marriage.

I couldn’t go to Confession because I had no intention of not living with this person. Actually, I didn’t see it as such a huge deal but I bow to the Church’s rules.

Eventually, I stopped going to Mass for a few years.

Recently, came back into the fold and am in kind of a similar situation but with a different perspective.

I missed several Masses and until I can get to Confession, I can’t receive Communion. I went to Mass last weekend and did not receive Communion. I was the only person in the congregation who didn’t which I found interesting. But that’s neither here nor there.

At any rate, I wondered if there was even a point in going to Mass if you can’t receive Communion. I did it for years before and didn’t have a problem with it. But now it seems kind of pointless. I feel kind of bereft not going to Communion. In the past, it didn’t bother me at all.

Or is it just compounding the original sin of missing Mass? I’m confused.

Btw, I think I can finally get to Confession this weekend of the weather forecast is right which is always iffy.

With all due respect (and not wanting to sound judgmental), what you are doing is compouding one sin on top of another. That is not a good thing. Your situation does not preclude you from assisting at Mass.

It is also a serious misconception to think that the whole point of going to Mass is to receive Holy Communion. Mass is not about us; it is about giving God the due worship that His majesty deserves. We do not have to receive Holy Communion to fulfill our Sunday obligation.

My late paternal grandmother was involved in an invalid marriage for the better part of 30+ years. However, not once did she miss Mass. She taught my dad (and later on, me) the importance of the Mass, especially the Paschal Triduum. When I was 14 years old, I was surprised to see her receive Holy Communion, along with my step-grandfather. Later on, I learned that her marriage to my grandfather had been annulled and she and my step-grandfather had had their marriage convalidated.

 

[EasterJoy]

My late paternal grandmother was involved in an invalid marriage for the better part of 30+ years. However, not once did she miss Mass. She taught my dad (and later on, me) the importance of the Mass, especially the Paschal Triduum. When I was 14 years old, I was surprised to see her receive Holy Communion, along with my step-grandfather. Later on, I learned that her marriage to my grandfather had been annulled and she and my step-grandfather had had their marriage convalidated.

That is a beautiful story. I heard one like it for the feast of Corpus Christi last year. The mother who had refrained from Holy Communion all those years had married an Episcopalian, had a child right away, and then been abandoned by her husband because the mother-in-law rejected the marriage, the daughter-in-law and the grandchild. She remarried and continued to go to Mass, but did not receive Holy Communion with her husband until a pastor heard their story, discerned that her first marriage was probably not valid, and helped them to have her first marriage annulled so they could have theirs convalidated. That was about 40 years later, if I remember right. If there was a dry eye in the church when the story was related, it wasn’t near me.

 

[GoneAstray]

I actually did something far worse than live with someone. Not that I don’t realize that was a grave sin to but on the scale of grave sins, if living with someone is a 5 then this was a 10.

The good news is that the guilt and pain drove me back to the church. I had already stopped what I had been doing but I knew I need absolution.

I think that was the most sincere confession I’ve ever had. I just let it all out.

I have not lived with the person I lived with for 5 years. In the interim, I did stop going to Mass.

It wasn’t until I really messed up that it became evident to me, that I had to get back to the Church or the road I was on was going to lead me further and further from God.

And I don’t think of myself as a bad person. Just a normal human being with weaknesses. But the truth is unless you have a solid foundation with your church, your weaknesses will always triumph. JMO.

So I’m working on rebuilding my relationship with the Church and God. I don’t expect to be transformed overnight. I look at it as more of journey with forward steps and yes, the occasional one back.

 

[ProVobis]

I actually did something far worse than live with someone. Not that I don’t realize that was a grave sin to but on the scale of grave sins, if living with someone is a 5 then this was a 10.

The good news is that the guilt and pain drove me back to the church. I had already stopped what I had been doing but I knew I need absolution.

I’m not going to judge those who cohabitate outside marriage. There may be economic or other forces in play there. However, realizing that you needed the absolution and eventually getting it is really the bottom line. Congrats.