Mortal sin question...again

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hey all, sorry to be a bother with all of these mortal sin questions.

As most of you know, I suffer from scrupulosity OCD, so things like this are just hard for me to figure out without freaking out…

Well, I usually go to confession every week, regardless of mortal sin or not, just to clear my conscience and get a fresh start. So, I wanted to go today, too. However, I woke up with a head cold, and my mom is putting her foot down, saying I can’t go.

I don’t know if I have committed any mortal sins.

You see, my main issue is this: as I said in a post about a week ago, lately I’ve been somewhat addicted to a certain fandom (a show called Supernatural). Well, I was able to discern that it was okay to watch the show in the first place. Then, I was able to discern that it was okay to read fanfiction for it. Especially considering that most of the fanfiction I’ve been reading has been by a Christian author. Anyways, this is my new issue:

Lately, I’ve been reading too much fanfiction. It’s not like the fiction is explicit or immoral (actually, some of it has been very moral and with a Christian message), but I feel like I’ve been putting it before God, because I’ve been spending practically every hour of free time reading or watching tv, and only 30 mins or less devoted to God during the day. Heck, I KNOW I’ve been putting it before God. Which leads me to believe it has become idolatry. So, is this a mortal sin? I am definitely not reading any fanfics today.

Thanks again, sorry to be so obsessed with this…
 
hey all, sorry to be a bother with all of these mortal sin questions.

As most of you know, I suffer from scrupulosity OCD, so things like this are just hard for me to figure out without freaking out…

Well, I usually go to confession every week, regardless of mortal sin or not, just to clear my conscience and get a fresh start. So, I wanted to go today, too. However, I woke up with a head cold, and my mom is putting her foot down, saying I can’t go.

I don’t know if I have committed any mortal sins.

You see, my main issue is this: as I said in a post about a week ago, lately I’ve been somewhat addicted to a certain fandom (a show called Supernatural). Well, I was able to discern that it was okay to watch the show in the first place. Then, I was able to discern that it was okay to read fanfiction for it. Especially considering that most of the fanfiction I’ve been reading has been by a Christian author. Anyways, this is my new issue:

Lately, I’ve been reading too much fanfiction. It’s not like the fiction is explicit or immoral (actually, some of it has been very moral and with a Christian message), but I feel like I’ve been putting it before God, because I’ve been spending practically every hour of free time reading or watching tv, and only 30 mins or less devoted to God during the day. Heck, I KNOW I’ve been putting it before God. Which leads me to believe it has become idolatry. So, is this a mortal sin? I am definitely not reading any fanfics today.

Thanks again, sorry to be so obsessed with this…
If you do not know, it/they cannot be mortal. Do not forgo communion lightly. If I have an impure thought. The thought is always grave matter (be not afraid). When I become aware that I am having the the thought(not before) knowledge attaches. If I turn to Jesus, I set my will against it and the sin is not mortal. If after realizing I am having an impure thought I consciously decide to entertain it…now i am in sin. In your post it seems if after you ask God “So, is this a mortal sin?” and you think it is, if you then obstinately continue to enjoy that which you have determined is idolatry, then you have grave matter, full knowledge and consent of the will. Going to confession weekly is good. There is ACTUAL GRACE we can use in our lives. Do whatever He tells you.

peace
 
If you do not know, it/they cannot be mortal. Do not forgo communion lightly. If I have an impure thought. The thought is always grave matter (be not afraid). When I become aware that I am having the the thought(not before) knowledge attaches. If I turn to Jesus, I set my will against it and the sin is not mortal. If after realizing I am having an impure thought I consciously decide to entertain it…now i am in sin. In your post it seems if after you ask God “So, is this a mortal sin?” and you think it is, if you then obstinately continue to enjoy that which you have determined is idolatry, then you have grave matter, full knowledge and consent of the will. Going to confession weekly is good. There is ACTUAL GRACE we can use in our lives. Do whatever He tells you.

peace
thank you very much for this! I have a question, though: it sounds like you said that if I think that something is a mortal sin and simply keep doing it, than I am in sin. However, with OCD, I often get bombarded with thinking that every little thing is mortal sin, and then find out that I was worrying unnecessarily. So, for me, I often have to make the decision of believing my OCD and being miserable, or disregarding my OCD and not knowing the consequences. So, if I think something is mortal sin and keep doing it, it IS mortal sin? I’m just confused.
 
thank you very much for this! I have a question, though: it sounds like you said that if I think that something is a mortal sin and simply keep doing it, than I am in sin. However, with OCD, I often get bombarded with thinking that every little thing is mortal sin, and then find out that I was worrying unnecessarily. So, for me, I often have to make the decision of believing my OCD and being miserable, or disregarding my OCD and not knowing the consequences. So, if I think something is mortal sin and keep doing it, it IS mortal sin? I’m just confused.
No.

And, please go talk to your priest not people on the internet who are not acquainted with scrupulosity and don’t understand this illness.
 
I don’t know if I have committed any mortal sins.
Then you have not committed any.

You appear to be a devout Catholic, so you would know if you did something seriously sinful. I used to suffer from really bad scrupulosity/ocd as well. The obsessive thoughts are a nightmare. Let the thoughts go!! You need to act against the compulsions. If you will, allow yourself to sin, without actually sinning.

I personally ONLY go to confession when I have mortal sins which I am VERY certain of. Anything more sets me right into serious obsessions. I do not confess venial sins, only the mortal sins that are clear and certain to me, and I am at peace knowing that I made a good confession.

Have you considered going to a doctor and trying medication? OCD can be very debilitating. I have had constant thoughts that I was about to die for a couple months and could hardly leave the house. In your case, you seem to have constant worry about sin, that might prevent you from doing things and living a normal life.
 
See your confessor and listen and do whatever He tells you. Be not afraid. When my mind becomes like a tree full of chattering monkeys the grace of His presence and ejaculatory prayer " Jesus I trust in you" always helps me. I still confess every week.
Actual grace helps.
Peace
 
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