Mortal Sin - Thinking, Knowing, Denial

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scrupulousrvrt

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As my username suggests, this will be a sticky subject.
I’ve been trying to “white-knuckle” my faith journey out of fear of committing mortal sin. I know what the CCC states, but I feel like I’m always in a state of mortal sin, but I don’t really know. I could possibly be in mortal sin but living in denial. But, if I’m not in mortal sin, then I’ll worry about committing a mortal sin and resisting such with clenched fists.
Going white-knuckle doesn’t work. Relaxing myself doesn’t work (although it’s much better).
 
scrupulousrvrt said:
As my username suggests, this will be a sticky subject.
I’ve been trying to “white-knuckle” my faith journey out of fear of committing mortal sin. I know what the CCC states, but I feel like I’m always in a state of mortal sin, but I don’t really know. I could possibly be in mortal sin but living in denial. But, if I’m not in mortal sin, then I’ll worry about committing a mortal sin and resisting such with clenched fists.
Going white-knuckle doesn’t work. Relaxing myself doesn’t work (although it’s much better).
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Have you spoken to your confessor?

While-knuckling through faith and life is not what God wills of anyone. That’s a miserable existence.

I’d rather you speak to your confessor and unconditionally obey whatever he tells you, no ifs, no buts.
 
I’m in the same boat as you. There are times where I do feel like I am scrupulous. For example, my mind brings up a sin from the past that I think is mortal or some small things I do are mortal sins. It’s awful to live like this. Right now, I am worried that a couple fanfictions I have read were considered pornography. I keep trying to tell myself that the stories didn’t go into detail and just briefly mentioned it (mentions nakedness, bedsheets, etc). My scrupulous side thinks that it is pornography while my other side doesn’t. There are other times where my scruples think reading fanfics that have same sex couples is a mortal sin as well. This scrupulosity is literally tearing me apart. I don’t know how to deal with it either. I don’t know how I can stop myself from thinking these things. I’ll be praying for you!
 
CatholicCraze said:
I’m in the same boat as you. There are times where I do feel like I am scrupulous. For example, my mind brings up a sin from the past that I think is mortal or some small things I do are mortal sins. It’s awful to live like this. Right now, I am worried that a couple fanfictions I have read were considered pornography. I keep trying to tell myself that the stories didn’t go into detail and just briefly mentioned it (mentions nakedness, bedsheets, etc). My scrupulous side thinks that it is pornography while my other side doesn’t. There are other times where my scruples think reading fanfics that have same sex couples is a mortal sin as well. This scrupulosity is literally tearing me apart. I don’t know how to deal with it either. I don’t know how I can stop myself from thinking these things. I’ll be praying for you!
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Speak to a trusted confessor and obey him unconditionally, no ifs, no buts.

In fact, I always say, in short: scrupulous, for your own sake, stay off these boards!

(because these boards are bad for you)
 
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