Mortal sins and confession.

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Hello! I have this doubt…
My parents doesn’t have the habit of confession, and I must say that I don’t really understand it. I only recently became aware of the so called mortal sins. Today, I engaged in one of those acts, but I didn’t know it was a mortal sin. I am deeply regretful of my conduct, and I will do my best not to repeat it. I was reading about confession and mortal sins, and this doubt came to my mind: Is it ok if I don’t confess? It would be very hard to get to make a confession for me, I don’t think I can explain this to my parents without exposing them my sin and creating a unecessary problem for the family.
Hope this is not a repeated doubt, I found nothing about it at the search.
 
If you didn’t know it was a mortal sin at the time you did it, then you don’t strictly need to confess. But if it’s a sin you tend to commit frequently then it’s a good idea to confess anyway - it gives you the graces to avoid sin in future.

It would seem you’re not in a situation where you can get to Confession by yourself - is that the case, that you have no public transport or friends who could give you a lift or anything?

Now I’m presuming you and/or your parents DO go to Mass every Sunday. For possible future reference, if physically getting to Confession is a problem you should try calling the church and making an appointment for the priest to hear your confession before Mass. You can start out by saying you want to remain anonymous (ie not give your name) and just ask if the priest could meet you in the confessional 15 minutes before Mass or something, which shouldn’t be a problem for your parents.
 
LilyM said:
If you didn’t know it was a mortal sin at the time you did it, then you don’t strictly need to confess. But if it’s a sin you tend to commit frequently then it’s a good idea to confess anyway - it gives you the graces to avoid sin in future.

It would seem you’re not in a situation where you can get to Confession by yourself - is that the case, that you have no public transport or friends who could give you a lift or anything?

Now I’m presuming you and/or your parents DO go to Mass every Sunday. For possible future reference, if physically getting to Confession is a problem you should try calling the church and making an appointment for the priest to hear your confession before Mass. You can start out by saying you want to remain anonymous (ie not give your name) and just ask if the priest could meet you in the confessional 15 minutes before Mass or something, which shouldn’t be a problem for your parents.
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Exactly…I can’t go by myself. Thing is that I rarely leave home alone. In fact, I could walk to the church, but a lot of people know my parents there, and it would not be nice if they get to know I went to the church by a third part. We used to go to the mass when I was younger, but my parents seen to have lost the habit. Actually, now that I am 18 that I am starting to have a real catholic life, so a lot of these things are new to me.
 
The_Chicken said:
Exactly…I can’t go by myself. Thing is that I rarely leave home alone. In fact, I could walk to the church, but a lot of people know my parents there, and it would not be nice if they get to know I went to the church by a third part. We used to go to the mass when I was younger, but my parents seen to have lost the habit. Actually, now that I am 18 that I am starting to have a real catholic life, so a lot of these things are new to me.
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OK, if you’ve said you CAN walk to the Church by yourself then there’s no such thing as ‘I can’t’. You must if you’re able.

You say your parents wouldn’t like the idea of you walking to the church by yourself? Why not? If you DO leave home alone for other things, even sometimes, then why would the fact that you go to church even be a problem? It’s not like you’re sneaking out to go to a nightclub or something! And what else do they think you are supposed to do if they never or hardly ever go themselves?

Forget ‘nice’ - we’re talking about your obligation as an adult Catholic here. You’re obligated to go to Mass every Sunday, unless it’s literally an impossibility for you, on pain of mortal sin. Whether or not your parents go with you, whether or not you think it’s ‘nice’ for them. On the contrary, if they dissuade or try to prevent you from going they’re the ones who are truly not being ‘nice’.

Perhaps get the pastor to talk to them about the fact that every Catholic is obligated to go to Mass on Sundays, and that they certainly shouldn’t stop you in any way, if you’re uncomfortable taking to them about it yourself.

In any event, since you’re an adult and not going anywhere wrong but just to Church it is really none of their business even.
 
Chicken:

Living your Faith is certainly more difficult when the people with whom you live do not. The pressures they can exert are subtle, I know, but very real and very troubling.

Perhaps it’s time to get creative. Do you have a job (even part-time)? Perhaps you can go to Confession at a church near work on your way to or from home, or on your meal break. Do you sometimes go out with friends? Maybe you could begin or end one of those outings with a visit to the rectory in another parish (arrangements with the priest ahead of time would be an appreciated courtesy).

Blessed Miguel Pro, a martyr during the persecution in Mexico, used a variety of disguises and other ruses to live his Faith and his vocation at the risk of his life. To be sure, your situation is not as extreme, but ask him to pray for you to find your way through this difficulty.

One more thing to keep in mind. You’ll be tempted to think you’re being “sneaky” or somehow dishonest in keeping this from your parents and others. Work hard to overcome that temptation. You’re beginning life as an adult, and you have the right (as well as the duty) to live your Faith in accordance with your (well-formed) conscience.

I will pray for you.

Servulus
 
The_Chicken said:
It would be very hard to get to make a confession for me, I don’t think I can explain this to my parents without exposing them my sin and creating a unecessary problem for the family.
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what does this have to do with your parents? if you need a ride to confession, just ask for it, no need to tell you why. if they push you for an answer they are way out of bounds and you should respectfully remind them. they should take you, no questions asked, otherwise buttonhole the priest before Mass and ask for confession, and make it quick.
 
Thanks for your replies! I have been thinking about it and I will talk to my mother tomorrow about taking our religion more seriously. Hope it goes well.
 
The_Chicken said:
Thanks for your replies! I have been thinking about it and I will talk to my mother tomorrow about taking our religion more seriously. Hope it goes well.
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I have just talked to her…she agreed to take me for confession and to go to mass every week. Easier than I thought. Thanks for the help folks!
 
The_Chicken said:
I have just talked to her…she agreed to take me for confession and to go to mass every week. Easier than I thought. Thanks for the help folks!
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Wow! If it could only be that easy for everyone!🙂 Prayers for you and your family.
 
If you didn’t know it was a mortal sin then it wasn’t a mortal sin for you.
 
The_Chicken said:
I have just talked to her…she agreed to take me for confession and to go to mass every week. Easier than I thought. Thanks for the help folks!
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Fantastic! Parents are usually more reasonable than we children tend to give them credit for 🙂
 
The Baltimore Catechism - Part 3
LESSON SIXTH: On Sin and Its Kinds
ON SIN AND ITS KINDS.

**Q. 274. How is sin divided? **
A.
(1) Sin is divided into the sin we inherit called original sin, and the sin we commit ourselves, called actual sin.
(2) Actual sin is sub-divided into greater sins, called mortal, and lesser sins, called venial.

**Q. 275. In how many ways may actual sin be committed? **
A. Actual sin may be committed in two ways: namely, by willfully doing things forbidden, or by willfully neglecting things commanded.

**Q. 276. What is our sin called when we neglect things commanded? **
A. When we neglect things commanded our sin is called a sin of omission. Such sins as willfully neglecting to hear Mass on Sundays, or neglecting to go to Confession at least once a year, are sins of omission.
**
Q. 277. Is original sin the only kind of sin? **
A. Original sin is not the only kind of sin; there is another kind of sin, which we commit ourselves, called actual sin.

**Q. 278. What is actual sin? **
A. Actual sin is any willful thought, word, deed, or omission contrary to the law of God.

Q. 279. How many kinds of actual sin are there?
A. There are two kinds of actual sin – mortal and venial.

**Q. 280. What is mortal sin? **
A. Mortal sin is a grievous offense against the law of God.

**Q. 281. Why is this sin called mortal? **
A. This sin is called mortal because it deprives us of spiritual life, which is sanctifying grace, and brings everlasting death and damnation on the soul.

**Q. 282. How many things are necessary to make a sin mortal? **

A. To make a sin mortal, three things are necessary:

a grievous matter, sufficient reflection, and full consent of the will.

**Q. 283. What do we mean by “grievous matter” with regard to sin? **
A. By “grievous matter” with regard to sin we mean that the thought, word or deed by which mortal sin is committed must be either very bad in itself or severely prohibited, and therefore sufficient to make a mortal sin if we deliberately yield to it.

**Q. 284. What does “sufficient reflection and full consent of the will” mean? **
A. “Sufficient reflection” means that we must know the thought, word or deed to be sinful at the time we are guilty of it; and “full consent of the will” means that we must fully and willfully yield to it.

Good for you! Fight for your faith or just ask mom;)
This book really helps
**The Baltimore Catechism **
catholicinformationcenteroninternet.org/Catechism/index.html

The Catechism of the Catholic Church
usccb.org/catechism/text/entiretoc1.htm
 
The_Chicken said:
Hello! I have this doubt…
My parents doesn’t have the habit of confession, and I must say that I don’t really understand it. I only recently became aware of the so called mortal sins. Today, I engaged in one of those acts, but I didn’t know it was a mortal sin. I am deeply regretful of my conduct, and I will do my best not to repeat it. I was reading about confession and mortal sins, and this doubt came to my mind: Is it ok if I don’t confess? It would be very hard to get to make a confession for me, I don’t think I can explain this to my parents without exposing them my sin and creating a unecessary problem for the family.
Hope this is not a repeated doubt, I found nothing about it at the search.
Click to expand...
Doubts are from the devil. He wants to keep you away from Confession.

It is never okay to not confess mortal sins.
 
fellowChristian said:
The Baltimore Catechism - Part 3
LESSON SIXTH: On Sin and Its Kinds
ON SIN AND ITS KINDS.

**Q. 274. How is sin divided? **
A.
(1) Sin is divided into the sin we inherit called original sin, and the sin we commit ourselves, called actual sin.
(2) Actual sin is sub-divided into greater sins, called mortal, and lesser sins, called venial.

**Q. 275. In how many ways may actual sin be committed? **
A. Actual sin may be committed in two ways: namely, by willfully doing things forbidden, or by willfully neglecting things commanded.

**Q. 276. What is our sin called when we neglect things commanded? **
A. When we neglect things commanded our sin is called a sin of omission. Such sins as willfully neglecting to hear Mass on Sundays, or neglecting to go to Confession at least once a year, are sins of omission.
**
Q. 277. Is original sin the only kind of sin? **
A. Original sin is not the only kind of sin; there is another kind of sin, which we commit ourselves, called actual sin.

**Q. 278. What is actual sin? **
A. Actual sin is any willful thought, word, deed, or omission contrary to the law of God.

Q. 279. How many kinds of actual sin are there?
A. There are two kinds of actual sin – mortal and venial.

**Q. 280. What is mortal sin? **
A. Mortal sin is a grievous offense against the law of God.

**Q. 281. Why is this sin called mortal? **
A. This sin is called mortal because it deprives us of spiritual life, which is sanctifying grace, and brings everlasting death and damnation on the soul.

**Q. 282. How many things are necessary to make a sin mortal? **

A. To make a sin mortal, three things are necessary:

a grievous matter, sufficient reflection, and full consent of the will.

**Q. 283. What do we mean by “grievous matter” with regard to sin? **
A. By “grievous matter” with regard to sin we mean that the thought, word or deed by which mortal sin is committed must be either very bad in itself or severely prohibited, and therefore sufficient to make a mortal sin if we deliberately yield to it.

**Q. 284. What does “sufficient reflection and full consent of the will” mean? **
A. “Sufficient reflection” means that we must know the thought, word or deed to be sinful at the time we are guilty of it; and “full consent of the will” means that we must fully and willfully yield to it.

Good for you! Fight for your faith or just ask mom;)
This book really helps
**The Baltimore Catechism **
catholicinformationcenteroninternet.org/Catechism/index.html

The Catechism of the Catholic Church
usccb.org/catechism/text/entiretoc1.htm
Click to expand...
Thanks!
 
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