"Move the Milk Ian" and other family sayings

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I know you’ve got 'em, so let’s hear 'em!

You know what I mean – those familial sayings that only your family gets. Could’ve come out of a simple slip of the tongue of a child, or a funny joke from the husband or wife. Could have passed down from either spouse’s family – either way it becomes a family standard and is just simply YOURS.

“Move the Milk Ian” typically has an expletive between “the” and “Milk” but we’ve tried to curb the word due to small children in the house. 😛

Anyway, here’s how it came about: as mother and supreme ruler of my household everyone thinks I know where something is at. (and I often do) All of you women here know what I am talking about. What drives me BATTY is when someone says, for example: “where’s the juice?” because obviously the juice is in the fridge. So I say “in the fridge, of course.” And then what follows is the typical “NO IT’S NOT! I CAN’T FIND IT! WHERE IS IT???” Which is the siren call for me stop whatever it is I am doing to help the searcher find whatever their little heart desires. Be it juice, be it their shoes, be it a Littlest Pet Shop Chihuahua, mom must help find it – even though said item is in plain sight – or perhaps right behind the milk.

But Ian, my DH, he is by FAR, the worse offender (as I type this Eden is walking yelling “where’s my pencil case? Where’s my pencil case?!?” DH actually answered her. :eek: ) of this type thing. It usually involves food but can sometimes be so obscure as to “where is that one award I won from the Navy?” :confused: “Which one hon?” “Nevermind, but yeah you know the one in the blue folder.” They are ALL in blue folders Ian. I have to seriously struggle not to start naggin’ with the old and many times said “if you put stuff AWAY and had a place for things – you wouldn’t go through this.” Regardless, I am typically dragged into every search he goes on, whether I want to or not, because if not he’ll tear up the house!

So one day I was unexpectedly caught up in one of Ian’s searches while on the phone with his mom, simultaneous to a child’s search for yogurt or something. I get to griping about it – “arghhh that drives me nuts – if they would just LOOK and not expect me to find everything for them…blah blah blah.” Out of my very non-swearing and 2nd grade teacher MIL’s mouth comes:

“Oh I KNOW it, it’s like JUST MOVE THE %^&%$*& MILK IAN!”

:rotfl:

And a tradition is born. 😃

So now whenever anyone in this house loses something and start crying they can’t find it we all say “move the milk.” Aka: LOOK HARDER BEFORE YOU PANIC.

Why did I post this? Just now DH was looking for the Pam since he’s cooking dinner. I say “I don’t know where it went, I can’t find it in the spice cabinet or the pantry, I looked today when making eggs” so I am looking in every cabinet (total habit, can’t help it, must help him look, but mind you I didn’t start screaming “where’s the PAM?” at 8AM! 😛 ) and he’s checking every countertop behind appliances and such. Finally he spots it – where it belongs, in the spice cabinet, top shelf, behind some vinegar. I kid you not – he says “Move the milk KC!” LOL

OK Dude, you are 6’2" and I am 5’4" – I couldn’t reach the “milk” to move it! :rolleyes: Either way just hearing it makes me laugh – especially when it’s used on me – cause that’s rare. 😃

So what’s you funny family saying?
 
“What, are you home schooled?”

We do homeschool, so we can say this. Whenever someone does something boneheaded, that’s the reply!

Also, “We’re in Delaware, it’s OK to cuss.”

Once we went on a field trip to a dam - saw the inner workings etc. As we drive away, dd says, “That’s the best dam field trip I’ve ever been on.” We were near the tiny strip of Delaware along I- 95 so dh decided the kids could use foul language just while we were on 95 in Delaware (which is a matter of minutes).
 
“What, are you home schooled?”

We do homeschool, so we can say this. Whenever someone does something boneheaded, that’s the reply!

Also, “We’re in Delaware, it’s OK to cuss.”

Once we went on a field trip to a dam - saw the inner workings etc. As we drive away, dd says, “That’s the best dam field trip I’ve ever been on.” We were near the tiny strip of Delaware along I- 95 so dh decided the kids could use foul language just while we were on 95 in Delaware (which is a matter of minutes).
LOL those are GREAT!
 
Ours come from movies and books we’ve all read and liked.

One is from the movie “Almost Famous”, which is required at my house (I was raised on rock music, like, Red Hot Chili Peppers were my favorite band when I was five). Basically, one of the characters at one part says, “I’ve made a decision. I’m going to Morocco…for one year.”

So, every time I tell my parents I’ve made a decision, they always ask if I’m going to Morocco for a year 😉
 
Boys to their sister… “And mom sends you to the GOOD school?”
When the sister does something stupid.

“I’m 18 I will do what I want”
(they have been saying this since 15 and past 18 to their current ages) OK…ds2 was writing a book of oneliners kids use on parents. He was 15 at the time… there were more… tons more but this one stuck because he wasn’t 18.

“I love you?”
Kids say this when they are in trouble or need to go to the hospital… It all started when ds1 asked for lunch money and I handed him a $5 bill(lunch is $2.50) and the next day asked for lunch money again… I said, “I gave you $5 yesterday… DO NOT TELL ME YOU USED IT ALL!!!” So he looks at me sheepishly and says, “I love you?” like it is a question… now as soon as the kids think they are in trouble they all do the same…it still makes me laugh!

“Grandma said fart”
The kids were amazed when my mom said that word then a minute later was yelling at my brother to not cuss…now the kids will say it randomly when things are too quiet.

It’s Sunday and dd2 didn’t trip…
for years dd2 tripped on Sunday either before church or in church…I spent more on tights for that child than any other undergarment!

There are tons more but I can’t think right now.
 
KMart’s having a half price sale on flowers and candy.

That is the line used when people get into an argument in my family and its getting tense.

Oh, and when something gets taken apart or destroyed out of curiosity at my home, we say it was “joey-ed”, because he is the child that would do it, and 99.99999999% of the time is the culprit. (he’s 5, btw, and has been like this since he could walk). He had to sit in the principal’s office one day for an hour for acting up in class, and they put him in a conference room. He removed a bolt from the table, so that the next day when I went in for IEP reviews, the whole table was rickety and listing to one side. My older son’s teacher found the bolt on the floor and fixed the table, while the counselor told me that yes, indeed, it was my younger one that was responsible.:rolleyes: It could have been worse. One of the cabinets, unlocked, had cans of paint in it. He knows how to use a paint can key and we keep ours high up out of his reach at home.

His name gets used as a verb, adverb, and adjective, besides being used as a proper noun constantly!
 
KMart’s having a half price sale on flowers and candy.

That is the line used when people get into an argument in my family and its getting tense.

Oh, and when something gets taken apart or destroyed out of curiosity at my home, we say it was “joey-ed”, because he is the child that would do it, and 99.99999999% of the time is the culprit. (he’s 5, btw, and has been like this since he could walk). He had to sit in the principal’s office one day for an hour for acting up in class, and they put him in a conference room. He removed a bolt from the table, so that the next day when I went in for IEP reviews, the whole table was rickety and listing to one side. My older son’s teacher found the bolt on the floor and fixed the table, while the counselor told me that yes, indeed, it was my younger one that was responsible.:rolleyes:

His name gets used as a verb, adverb, and adjective, besides being used as a proper noun constantly!
I had one like this!!! He took apart everything from toys to phones to computers… then we saw Little Man Tate… just remind people that intelligent kids have to explore how things work.
 
Oh, yeah. The gifted teacher was in the room and said, “you can’t leave him alone with nothing to do! Of course he took the table apart”.

He is our future mechanical engineer.😃 If he survives childhood without blowing something up.
 
Oh, yeah. The gifted teacher was in the room and said, “you can’t leave him alone with nothing to do! Of course he took the table apart”.

He is our future mechanical engineer.😃 If he survives childhood without blowing something up.
Mine is working as the server/software engineer at a company that makes the flight simulators the government and the FAA use…

He just told me about the practical jokes he plays at work… like his boss telling him and another guy to clean their area… so they totally emptied the office into the bosses office!

I can’t complain because I have pulled my share of doosies in my day too…

Oh… advice… teach him that hot oil does explode when you throw an ice cube into it before he burns your kitchen… and those science experiments where they mix anything and everything in the house…belong in the toilet only! Trust me… mine is 21 now and still that kid…
 
“That’s not a fork, that’s a spoon!”
Gosh, I hardly remember the story, but we say it all the time. Seems to me we were eating dinner and someone little said they needed a fork, which was by their plate, but they couldn’t see it. I told them they had a fork already and they held their spoon up and said the above quote… 😃

That’s often followed by yelling “SPOON!” which we got from the Tick cartoon–it’s their battle cry.

Gosh, I know there are others, but I gotta think about it…ah, got one. We often say eatable for edible from Roald Dahl’s Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Oh and when Dh and are are arguing about something silly, we break the tension by saying “you burned the meat loaf”. When we got married our pastor told us a story about a couple fighting about the burnt meatloaf, when they were really angry about something else. It’s our code for “this is a silly fight.”

Btw, KC, my family is the same way. They must think I have a psychic connection to other people’s shoes, because they always think I know where theirs are, among other items! Dh is the worst, he’ll look and look for something, I can tell him RIGHT where it is, he won’t see it. I’ll walk in, open the drawer/cabinet/fridge and reach in and pull it right out. Drives him nuts! 😛
 
My Dad is mildly dyslexic, and when I brought home my first grade reader, he thought the characters’ names were Mipex and Tipex, so he would always ask me how Mipex and Tipex were doing. They ultimately morphed into imaginary friends who could be doing just about anything, and even today, 40 years later, he still asks how Mipex and Tipex are doing, and we still make up a story for them.
 
I thought of a few more…

Money can’t buy knives… said when someone says or does something stupid… comes from BIL saying this on a family vacation.

Another one from BIL… You can’t steal salad. I guess the family was in a restaurant and everyones dinner came with a trip to the salad bar except one persons… and when the others went up to the salad bar, they forgot and went too…

More to come… I’m sure
 
i guess it sounds morbid, but whenever i find myself giving a list of instructions to a kid or kids as they are leaving the house i.e., 'stay together, cross at this corner, not the next, call in an hour… etc." i usually add this final one: “***and don’t forget rule number one.” ***

to which everyone around responds, “***rule number one. don’t get killed.” ***

if a newer friend is visiting, one of our kids will always explain, “all the other rules rely on us following that one.”

if a familiar friend is around, s/he will shout out with the rest: ***“rule number one. don’t get killed.” ***

but if my kids think i’m trying to show off rule number one to a visitor or grandparent, they’ll all act like they never heard rule number one.

they just refuse to do clever kid tricks.
 
This is so funny, my family had mostly weird “actions” not phrases though. The one that is coming to mind bc of KC mentioning milk, is the important milk system we had.

My oldest brother was a total milkhound. We had (well still have- my dad thinks 1 guy living alone needs 2 fridges 😉 ) a second fridge primarily to hold the 8 4-litre bags of milk my mom bought weekly. Since my brother would easily drink the whole jug at one meal we developed a “dot” system. We had this ugly green jug from the 60s, and we put a black mark on it with a Sharpie about 3 inches from the bottom. So whoever went BELOW the dot had to get up from the crowded dinner table and get another bag. We all went to great pains to make sure we were only ON the dot. 😛 Heated arguments about the Dot Rules were a regular occurrence. My mom, not to get involved, would take milk from my cup for her coffee! 😃
 
Once we went on a field trip to a dam - saw the inner workings etc. As we drive away, dd says, “That’s the best dam field trip I’ve ever been on.” We were near the tiny strip of Delaware along I- 95 so dh decided the kids could use foul language just while we were on 95 in Delaware (which is a matter of minutes).
ROTFLMBO!!!
That is GREAT!! 😃 One question, was your DD trying to make that pun, or was she innocently stating that she liked the field trip? 😃

When I was a kid growing up in the Appalachian foothills of NC, we were in the car somewhere in the NC Smokies trying to find a certain iceskating rink in the mountains. So, you have to know that it’s a running joke with my family since before I was born that Daddy is NEVER lost, he’s just taking a short cut. Apparently, on this trip, the only thing Daddy was sure of is that the rink is on the NC side of the mountains. We’ve been driving for a suspiciously loooong time, and mom’s starting to tease Daddy about being lost, to which he of course he scoffs, “Lost?! I’M not lost”. So mom says, laughing, "Right! We’ll know we’re *really *lost if we see a sign that says “WELCOME TO TENNESSEE!” Well, sure enough, around the very next curve, what do we see? The sign that says “WELCOME TO TENNESSEE!” :eek: :doh2: Dead silence in the car for about 3 seconds, and then screeches of laughter… even Daddy was laughing. 😃 That’s the one and only time I’ve seen him actually stop and turn around. I can’t even remember for sure if we made it to the rink that day, or if we just spent the day driving around the mountains and then went home. So of course, ever since then, if there’s any question of being lost, especially if Daddy’s the one driving, no matter where we are in creation, there’s some smart-mouth in the car saying “Are we in Tennessee yet?”:egyptian: Oh, first making sure they’re out of reach of his long arm!
 
“What, are you home schooled?”

We do homeschool, so we can say this. Whenever someone does something boneheaded, that’s the reply!

.
Oh OH I have a home school one, too!!! “Who’s *your *grammer teacher??” Said when someone makes a blatant mistake in syntax, b/c, of course, MOM’s the teacher!
 
This is so funny, my family had mostly weird “actions” not phrases though. The one that is coming to mind bc of KC mentioning milk, is the important milk system we had.

My oldest brother was a total milkhound. We had (well still have- my dad thinks 1 guy living alone needs 2 fridges 😉 ) a second fridge primarily to hold the 8 4-litre bags of milk my mom bought weekly. Since my brother would easily drink the whole jug at one meal we developed a “dot” system. We had this ugly green jug from the 60s, and we put a black mark on it with a Sharpie about 3 inches from the bottom. So whoever went BELOW the dot had to get up from the crowded dinner table and get another bag. We all went to great pains to make sure we were only ON the dot. 😛 Heated arguments about the Dot Rules were a regular occurrence. My mom, not to get involved, would take milk from my cup for her coffee! 😃
Milk in a bag…You got to explain that one. I’ve only seen milk in a jug or cardboard container. I know my first thought isn’t correct, but it did cause me to laugh. My first thought was you just take the bag off the cow and put it in the fridge :D:eek:
 
Oh… advice… teach him that hot oil does explode when you throw an ice cube into it before he burns your kitchen…
HEAVENS!!! Please be carefull if you tell him this stuff…some of us…er that is some of THEM will take it as a challenging new bit of information that they simply MUST try out for themsleves. Just to see if it really is true. I will have to see if i can find the link to the video i saw once of this. It is TRULY destructive. Your whole house could go up in flames in minutes. Sometimes its best not to give them any new ideas they didn’t already think of on their own.
 
If someone burps or makes a rude noise at a meal, the exclamation is, “Well, Rose!” I was an adult before discovering the whole world doesn’t say that. My grandmother apparently had a great-Aunt Rose who was rather crude. So, whenever anyone else was ill-mannered, the ultimate insult was to compare them to Aunt Rose, hence, “WELL, ROSE!”

The answer to where a lost item may be – “Up in Maggie’s room behind the clock.” (No, even I don’t understand that one . . . )

And, finally, the family motto which would be on a coat of arms if we had one – “It’s a great life if you don’t weaken.” 👍
 
Years ago in a game of Trivial Pursuit, my brother was stuck on an easy question. The correct answer turned out to be “the Caspian Sea.”

So, to this day, whenever he is confused about something he knows he should know, he says, “It’s ‘The Caspian Sea’.”
 
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