My Awful Coworker- She's sinking my spirits, please help me

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Hi. In a nutshell my coworker is a woman who is mean, talks to herself, curses under her breath constantly, tells our other coworkers blasphemous things about Jesus (she did that one time). I reported her a few years ago for her unprofessionalism, she used to get really mean and nasty to me. My boss and HR never did anything. Well, we have a new internal boss now that knows her but probably does not know the extent of her bad behaviour and I don’t want to be the person to bring up problems to the new boss. However, I will report directly to the new boss starting in November and my coworkers terrible behaviour affects my work. I have to be careful how to approach her to ask her a question because she might be in a mood. SHould I mention it again to the new boss or wait to see if she does any changes , I wonder if I should tell her her constant rudeness made me report her a few years ago. I can’t stand another day of working with this woman, it affects me so much, she is horrible. Today I heard her curse that something smelled disgusting (I was having lunch, we sit next to eachother) and she’s affecting me. It’s been 4 years of this. Should I wait until I"m asked? Any advice is appreciated. I cant find another job because my children have benefits tied to this one. Thank you so much everyone.
 
I pray that God will intervene and change her ATTITUDE,
which is affecting her co-workers. That she will come to
a Saving knowledge of Jesus, the only Name given among
men by which we MUST be saved(Acts 4:13).

Jesus, Help Me!

In every need let me come to You with humble trust,
saying:
Jesus, help me!
In all my doubts, perplexities, and temptations:
Jesus, help me!
In hours of loneliness, weariness and trials:
Jesus, help me!
In the failure of my plans and hopes, in disappointments,
troubles and sorrows:
Jesus, help me!
When others fail me, and Your Grace alone can assist me:
Jesus, help me!
When I throw myself on Your tender Love as Savior:
Jesus, help me!
When my heart is cast down by failure, at seeing no good
come from my efforts:
Jesus, help me!
When I feel impatient, and my cross irritates me:
Jesus, help me!
When I am ill, and my head and hands cannot work and
I am lonely:
Jesus, help me!

Always, always, in spite of weakness, falls and short-
comings of every kind:
Most Sacred Heart of Jesus, help me and never forsake me!

Amen
 
momof2angells said:
Hi. In a nutshell my coworker is a woman who is mean, talks to herself, curses under her breath constantly, tells our other coworkers blasphemous things about Jesus (she did that one time). I reported her a few years ago for her unprofessionalism, she used to get really mean and nasty to me. My boss and HR never did anything. Well, we have a new internal boss now that knows her but probably does not know the extent of her bad behaviour and I don’t want to be the person to bring up problems to the new boss. However, I will report directly to the new boss starting in November and my coworkers terrible behaviour affects my work. I have to be careful how to approach her to ask her a question because she might be in a mood. SHould I mention it again to the new boss or wait to see if she does any changes , I wonder if I should tell her her constant rudeness made me report her a few years ago. I can’t stand another day of working with this woman, it affects me so much, she is horrible. Today I heard her curse that something smelled disgusting (I was having lunch, we sit next to eachother) and she’s affecting me. It’s been 4 years of this. Should I wait until I"m asked? Any advice is appreciated. I cant find another job because my children have benefits tied to this one. Thank you so much everyone.
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I would suggest reading/contacting askamanager.org

That is a professional site that can give you the right things to say.

I think you have to separate out things that are quirky with things that are actually disturbing.

For instance, being mean and cursing is unacceptable but talking to yourself is a quirk that happens. The “telling blasphemous things about Jesus” is somewhat subjective athough religion really shouldn’t be brought up in an office setting.
 
In my country a holy guy gave his own daughter this advice,
‘Put up rosary beads in a public place at your desk in work,’

All the work bullying stopped immediately when she did.

Another holy guy in my country advised this prayer as many times as you want to say it in your head,
‘In the Name of Jesus, no weapon formed against me by ————-(name of mean co worker) shall prosper.’
 
Start documenting everything she says and does. Time, date and details. Note if there are any witnesses. You can use this information later to defend yourself if there is backlash because of your complaints.
 
It sounds like you’re more concerned with her way of annoying or offending you than being concerned about her when clearly she is very unhappy at least. Maybe she is really miserable and tormented by things you don’t know about. I can see why it would be annoying to you, and that’s only natural. Maybe try to focus more on having compassion for or at least tolerance towards her. Maybe God is letting it happen so that you can grow and learn some things and maybe even help her somehow. Ultimately, if your spirit sinks so easily, you could probably well use the chance to become stronger so that when someone worse comes along, you won’t find yourself so overwhelmed.

Documenting everything she says and does like a Stasi agent so that you can rat her out, I assume in the hopes of getting her fired or whatever, seems like overkill to me. Patience and tolerance for people shouldn’t be left behind once you step into the office, right? It’s a very American thing to treat the workplace as some kind of haven from everything that anyone could find objectionable. At the end of the day, you alone are responsible for your reactions and quality of work. Since HR did nothing, probably you were/are just overreacting.
 
Quite the contrary: When people like this toxic person are working with you, often they turn their sights on the innocent party. Having documentation is prudent.
In the case of false accusations or litigation, documentation of how both parties handled various conflicts can settle a matter rather quickly.
I had a boss who believed he did EVERYTHING right, and that everyone else was wrong.
I kept all of his nasty emails, times when I was blamed for things that did not even involve me, overtime worked at his behest for which I was never compensated for, etc. It was very useful. Turns out the company KNEW he was a problem, and need the backup for their suspicions. When they asked everyone to come forward with info, everyone did. Not just me.
Keeping quiet and protecting bullies is never the answer.
HR is often waiting for hard evidence. They don’t want to get sued either.
 
New boss can take care of things that happened since that boss started work. Don’t dredge up the past. Don’t bring up that your old manager and HR never did anything (because you have no way of knowing. They may have coached her, written her up and you would not be privy to that info.)

I once had to write up an employee because he passed gas pretty much constantly. He also had severe body odor.

It took some time, working with HR to make sure we covered all of the legal bases. The write up for excessive flatulence did contain the line “should there be a medical cause for this condition, please bring documentation from your treating physician and we will make accommodations accordingly.” The body odor was handled in a more casual matter, a manager from another department who this young man looked up to took the young man aside and talked about basic grooming.

The ladies who shared the cubical may have become frustrated that the process took so long, but, there are laws that must be followed.
 
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