My child is becoming very anti-Catholic

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SarahKate said:
She’s saying things like “I don’t ever want to be a dumb Catholic”. “I’m never going to be Catholic. Never, never, never.” “Mass is so boring and stupid. I hate it.” “Are we going to learn about stupid Catholic stuff today?” “I hate going to Mass and I hate the Catholic Church.”
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This sounds more like a kid who is bored with sitting through Mass than any kind of anti-Catholicism. It’s not surprising to have an 8-year-old be bored with Mass (I’m pretty sure I wasn’t jazzed about it at that age myself) and if she wasn’t raised attending Mass from a very young age, it’s not something that she has learned to tolerate/ accept/ understand as being a normal Sunday activity. Plus, if the Baptist church is offering a fun time for kids, then a normal kid will contrast fun Baptist activity time with boring Catholic Mass time and reach the same conclusion your daughter did.

As already mentioned, at a minimum she needs to learn to be more respectful in how she speaks about Mass and if you keep laying down the law she should mature into that over time. It’s going to be a hard sell to get her to really like Catholic Mass though, if the Baptists are offering more of a good time with friends and her father is showing a preference for Baptist church.

Although her saying those things is not acceptable, try not to take it personally. Most kids who aren’t born Padre Pio or Therese Martin of Lisieux don’t have a deep appreciation for holy things at age 8, and don’t understand how emotional adults can get about faith.
 
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giuseppe96 said:
I’m only saying that because the OP mentioned that her husband didn’t have any religious convictions. It doesn’t sound like he would care either way.
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I can see that from what the OP said too. I just read it that even though he doesn’t have firm convictions, he doesn’t want to be Catholic. If he doesn’t want to be Catholic, I guess I saw it as “undermining” if OP tried cutting her kids ties to the Baptist church.
Tis_Bearself said:
This sounds more like a kid who is bored with sitting through Mass than any kind of anti-Catholicism.
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Agreed. That’s where I’m leaning.

@SarahKate I was kind of thinking about this, along with some of my experiences:

Rather than anything she could have heard at her Baptist church, has she ever been put down for not being Catholic when you go to Mass? I’ve been to Masses, heard speakers my kids’ Faith Formation class sponsored and read letters in the bulletin putting down non-Catholic Christians. Due to these experiences (and some others) I don’t really look forward to going to Mass with my family either, and haven’t really ever been interested in converting.

IDK…just throwing it out there. If she’s been put down, or heard bad things about her (and her siblings/father’s) religion that could be upsetting…
 
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There was a violent 1st grader at my old school who was extremely athiest. Kids just don’t understand the reasons behind what they believe they are just told to believe
 
Most importantly, welcome home. I would pray the rosary for the intention of my families conversion and also do the Mary undoer of knots novina from time to time. Read about the novena on the internet. It is for family problems. St Monica prayed for St Augustines conversion for years and is also a good intersessor. We have had amazing resolutions to family problems by praying the rosary and this Novena. Give it a try it is very powerful
 
It’s an odd situation. He believes in the Real Presence from his early elementary years as a Catholic. He is very Catholic leaning in many of his religious views, but likes the familiarity and fellowship of the Baptist church. He’s said before that if for some reason we had to move out of state, he’d become Catholic. Here in the South, it’s much harder to be Catholic and he’s afraid of losing friends and of issues st work even though he has Catholic friends at work.

So I’m not undermining him, but showing him the that the things he’s been fed about the Catholic Church are false. My husband is also very concerned that our daughter is doing this. He enjoys going to Mass, but is scared to convert bc if losing face with his long time Baptist friends. His words, not mine.

My kids have not attended any faith formation at the parish we attend, so they’re not getting anything from there. She attends a Catholic scouting for girls club and has made many wonderful catholic friends, and none of them have ever said anything unkind.
 
Thank you for the ideas.

We attend Sunday School at the Baptist church and then go to Mass as a family.
 
Thank you for the encouragement! I will step up my Rosary praying and look up the undoer of knots as well.
 
I’m not undermining his faith. I’m trying to show him in a loving way that some of the things he’s believed about The Church are not true.
 
SarahKate said:
She’s saying things like “I don’t ever want to be a dumb Catholic”. “I’m never going to be Catholic. Never, never, never.” “Mass is so boring and stupid. I hate it.” “Are we going to learn about stupid Catholic stuff today?” “I hate going to Mass and I hate the Catholic Church.”

She regularly attends American Heritage Girls sponsored by the parish we attend, and has no problem with that. She LOVES it. Sometimes she’ll even say she loves going to Mass, and likes learning about the Saints. She grabs her rosary when she’s really scared or upset, and she asks Mary and St Francis to pray for her and our animals.
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Frankly, this just sounds like an eight year old who says things she knows will get under your skin and annoy you, not because of any deep seated anti-Catholicism, but just because eight year olds can be brats sometimes. Kind of comes with the territory.
 
SarahKate said:
She attends a Catholic scouting for girls club and has made many wonderful catholic friends, and none of them have ever said anything unkind.
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OK…just throwing it out there. I’ve met some Catholics who are accepting of non-Catholics (I even married one), but I’ve run into some that aren’t. Kids can be mean, especially when they find out someone isn’t “one of them”. It was just something to ponder.
SarahKate said:
I’m not undermining his faith.
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I didn’t say you were. I said that “Cutting the 8 year old’s ties with the Baptist church” would be…if done without your husband’s knowledge.
 
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Just clarifying that I wasn’t undermining his faith, that’s all.

I’m within earshot at all the meetings and haven’t heard or witnessed anything, which has been great. They are all really supportive and I’ve shared some of my journey with the moms.
 
That may be one reason- in Catholic Church she goes to mass with the all the adults and is required to sit, where childrens mass is more anything goes.
 
Could be…if they have it. I don’t recall having “children’s church” growing up. We had Sunday School, then attended regular service.

From what I do know about it, I wouldn’t necessarily call it anything goes. Maybe more “youth” based. I believe my wife’s parish does “children’s church” for K-1 at the 10am Sunday Mass.
 
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In the Catholic Church, it’s calked Children’s Liturgy of the Word.
 
SarahKate said:
Just clarifying that I wasn’t undermining his faith, that’s all.
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OK, I don’t think anyone said you were. The comment was on some advice that could have been construed that way.
SarahKate said:
I’m within earshot at all the meetings and haven’t heard or witnessed anything
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Alright…it was a thought based on some of my experiences as a non-Catholic. My wife has bounced back and forth across two parishes, and is really close to leaving the current one due to some experiences. You may be within ear-shot at all the meetings, but IMHO it’s an avenue I’d investigate…your call though.
 
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