Pray–a lot. The woman is obviously desperately wanting a child of her own and suffering with some form of infertility. Imagine how your heart would bleed if you knew that there was only one even possible way that you could ever experience being pregnant and having a baby of your very own with the man you love–cause that’s where your friend is coming from right now. She also obviously isn’t poor and can afford the procedure cause it’s spendy–as I bet you know too. So, the bottom line is that this could well turn out to be the one insurmountable stumbling block with her and her conversion to Catholicism–at least at this time. I won’t go into how I know this–let’s just say that in my work environment I have ran into several women in this position who knew I am Catholic and showed interest in the Catholic faith. They have heard all their life, among whatever else they think they know or have heard about the Catholic church, that we support and promote having as many children as we are able–they haven’t heard the part about “according to what God gives us” though. When you tell her that it is against the teachings of the Catholic church to try to have even one baby by the only possible means that she can ever conceive–and remember, in vitro doesn’t work every time either–how do you think she’s going to feel? In my personal experience, this kind of scenario is one of the hardest you will ever face in bringing someone into the church. You can only do so much to help bring your friend into the church–and if she does decide not to continue with her classes and conversion at this time–don’t feel guilty. I can remember feeling a little bit like a failure when something like this happened to me and the woman decided she just wasn’t ready to accept Catholic teaching in this area. The thing is, even if she decides not to now–you’ve planted a seed–and sometimes that’s all you are expected by God to do.
My sister once went for one but I prayed so hard that it wont go through and I did sacrifices and offerings to the Lord and it did work.Try it, prayers are stronger with a good faith. Ask your friends to help you pray for this intention. Praying the rosary and the Memorare also help.
I think part of the problem is the entitlement culture we live in. People believe they deserve a baby not that babies are blessings. I think you should sponsor her still. This is something that will be difficult to discuss. Maybe give her a copy of Humane Vitae. Pope John Paul II discussed extensively the dignity of the human person and that goes right from natural conception. It speaks for itself. Instead of you telling her, let a great Catholic thinker tell her.
Yes, because such a step demonstrates that she is not sincere. To enter the Church sacramentally while rejecting the moral teaching of the Church would be a situation one does not even want to think about. Advise her to speak to a priest pronto.
I think part of the problem is the entitlement culture we live in. People believe they deserve a baby not that babies are blessings. I think you should sponsor her still. This is something that will be difficult to discuss. Maybe give her a copy of Humane Vitae. Pope John Paul II discussed extensively the dignity of the human person and that goes right from natural conception. It speaks for itself. Instead of you telling her, let a great Catholic thinker tell her.
They already have. The Pope Paul VI Institute works with techniques known collectively as “NaPro (Natural Procreative) Technology”. I am most familiar with their innovative surgical techniques, which use minimally invasive surgery that is more effective at treating endometriosis and PCOS than previous surgical technique.
Don’t assume that she is necessarily rejecting the moral teaching of the Church. Chances are, she is completely unaware that the Church has any teaching at all against IVF. But yes, she should talk to a priest; and it sounds as though the OP (her sponsor) is also going to advise her about the Church teachings.
And some can even talk to a Priest and be told it’s okay as long
How do you know that she is even aware of the Churches teachings on life and IVF? RCIA just started for most parishes for the year.
This is precisely the sort of the worst case scenario that I was afraid would happen and alluded to in my earlier post, having seen it happen before myself. Your cousin–if at the point of actually scheduling the procedure, had already invested a lot of money and time in all the precursors such as the hormonal therapy that is required to help her achieve a lasting pregnancy with in vitro. I’m sure that she and her husband had also spent a lot of time emotionally investing in the potential of her becoming pregnant and them at last having the family that they both probably desperately want. She may just not be ready to accept Catholic teaching on this specific area at this time in her life–even if she could accept every other teaching without problem. Truthfully, if she achieves a pregnancy through in vitro–she may always be a bit glad that she opted to do in vitro–it’s hard for someone to be truly repentant for doing something that ends in them having a child that they very much desire. That’s just human nature, y’know… But pray for her and perhaps at some later point if she is truly called to convert, she will then decide to go ahead and do so. Sometimes it’s these teachings surrounding birth control or fertility issues that are the biggest stumbling blocks for non-Catholics who show interest in the Catholic faith–about all you can do is pray for them and show them love and compassion. Good luck…
