My dad and insurance, a moral dilemma

[LotusCarsLtd]

This is a very critical, time-sensitive issue and I appreciate any help whatsoever!

Here’s the gist: my dad, sister, and I are on a special insurance program through a local hospital for their services. It has helped my sister a lot with some health issues and has been a lifesaver (literally) for my dad. To qualify for this program you have to be living within a specific geographical location and none of us are anymore. I only realized this fact this year and since then have been considering letting my insurance membership quietly expire; I don’t intend to say anything to anyone about it because if the hospital found out they could cut-off my dad and sister, which would likely result in my father’s death as he is heavily reliant on this service for his meds and medical care.

But then my dad recently told me something that assuaged my fears and made me think again about leaving the program. My dad has used this service a lot and has a relationship with the hospital. He asked them if he moved outside the geographical area would he still be eligible to use the insurance, to which they replied “yes” because of his relationship with them. So this made me think that it would be okay to use the insurance even though we’re outside the hospital’s jurisdiction.

The problem is that it seems to me that my dad lies quite a lot. Sometimes I know he’s lying, other times I can’t confirm it. What made me suspicious about the insurance again is the fact that my dad, when he told me to call the hospital to speak with an insurance rep, told me that I should tell them we’re still living at our old address (which we have not for around a year). I refused to do so and never called them because I refused to lie to them, even though my dad kept saying that they wouldn’t bother asking for this particular information anyway (he told me to keep this in mind as a precaution in case they did ask).

And my dad seems to tell a lot of white lies on a regular basis or so it seems to me. So I’ve developed the habit of taking a lot of what he says with a grain of salt because I can’t always confirm if he’s telling the truth or not. And the same goes here with the insurance: I don’t know if he’s telling the truth or lying to me about the jurisdictional issues and I have no way of confirming things…and if he is lying he certainly wouldn’t admit it.

I have a doctor’s visit today and I am considering skipping it, although it’ll anger my dad. What should I do here? I feel on one hand it’s okay to go but because things are so fuzzy I am also wondering if the best option is to skip the appointment. If I let the insurance expire I will be without any whatsoever.

 

[abraham]

I wouldn’t skip the appointment. If your dad is lying to keep the insurance, then that is his sin, not yours. It sounds like you are a very honest person and would never lie to the insurance company, which is to be commended. It is not our moral responsibility to uncover all the lies in the world or determine who might be lying to us at any particular time. Keep up your honesty, and know that sometimes God can use evil (your dad’s lying) for good purposes (your health care).

 

[kage_ar]

This sounds like a legal issue, best to consult an attorney.

 

[abraham]

Also consider your relationship with your dad. If it were the other way around, and you were the father, and your son was lying, then you would have a moral responsibility. But since you are the son, remember one of the commandments is “honor your father and mother” and “obey your parents”, and I believe this continues to apply even after we are adults. That means that you can follow what he tells you about getting health care, except in the case where he directly asked you to lie on the phone.

 

[beeliner]

If your dad is lying to keep the insurance, then that is his sin, not yours.

It might or might not be a sin, but it sounds as if it would certainly be grounds for the insurance company to refuse to pay a claim.

As they say in insurance circles, “Honesty is the best policy”.

 

[SMHW]

This is a very critical, time-sensitive issue and I appreciate any help whatsoever!
.
.
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I have a doctor’s visit today and I am considering skipping it, although it’ll anger my dad. What should I do here? I feel on one hand it’s okay to go but because things are so fuzzy I am also wondering if the best option is to skip the appointment. If I let the insurance expire I will be without any whatsoever.

Who will get the bill if your insurance is declined? You or your father? And can you afford to pay it? I’d decide about your doctor’s appointment based on this.

Are you eligible for insurance through any school you may be attending or any other program? If you really are no longer eligible for your current coverage then YOU need to decide if you are willing to find coverage or go without.

There are reasonably priced catastrophic policies that young people can purchase. Most healthy young people would pay more in premiums for coverage for routine care than they would if they just paid out of pocket.

 

[LotusCarsLtd]

Who will get the bill if your insurance is declined? You or your father? And can you afford to pay it? I’d decide about your doctor’s appointment based on this.

It’s the insurance program that pays.

Are you eligible for insurance through any school you may be attending or any other program? If you really are no longer eligible for your current coverage then YOU need to decide if you are willing to find coverage or go without.

I really don’t make much money nor will I make much money so I can’t buy insurance unfortunately. No idea on the costs of the visit since I never see a bill.

 

[journey137]

My insurance is based out of a particular city’s hospital system and I have never lived in that city. It’s a 2.5 hour drive from where I live actually, but they have agreements with doctors out of their main area so there are in-network doctors I can visit in my city even though they are not technically affiliated with the hospital system we have our insurance through. Perhaps your insurance has a similar agreement? If you are able to find in-network doctors where ever you are now, I would guess that probably is the case and would not worry about it. I find it odd that you never see a bill too… I get statements from the doctor whenever I go so your father might be getting your statements. Ask if you’re curious as to what your bill actually looked like.

In my opinion, you should look around for personal insurance quickly if you will soon become ineligible on your father’s plan. I entered a 22 yr old non smoking male into www.ehealthinsurance.com and they had catastrophic plans as low as $30/month. Talk to an agent or search yourself, but insurance is out there and you should at least carry catastrophic coverage on yourself.

 

[puzzleannie]

the first thing I would do rather than relying on hearsay, or what you have been told about the insurance, is to take it to your insurance professional and find out what it really says, who is covered, for what, under what circumstances, and what steps you can take to continue this necessary coverage for those in you family who need it. Then you will be proceeding on accurate information. You can also sit down with the hospital’s business office and find out what are your options, but do it before you cancel the insurance, and don’t give them more information than they need to answer your questions.