My first mass and my journey to Catholicism

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Hi I’ve just joined the site and wanted to say hi and get some opinions/support hopefully from some other rcia people and see what you thought of my experience.
I moved to a new city and decided as I’d been thinking about the catholic faith for some time, I’d make contact with the local priest (of a relatively poor area) for a chat.
I went to mass a few times to observe and approached the priest after and asked him if i could meet for a chat. I subsequently did and after meeting him and asking questions for an hour or so, he became curious about me and my background (obviously not used to people wanting to talk about the faith).
I did not feel as though i was obliged to disclose all my personal history to a priest i’d just met on a first enquiry and probably appeared a little sheepish on explaining my life the last few years. For the record, I was a former police officer who had left the job after becoming ill, moved to new area for a new career, become ill again and finally got myself back together again on a third attempt. I can see that perhaps I had nothing to fear from discussing this with the priest but old habits of remaining reserved and maintaining my own privacy to strangers still operated within me. The second time i went to go and the see the same priest, he said he wass busy and that was it, I never went back. A while later i heard about an rcia at another church not so far away from the first church and decided to attended.
Am still attending but am finding the experience quite stressful. Most of the other people in the group are there as their wives/girlfriends want them there and genuine expressions of faith/enquiry from my other group members seem to be limited. The people running the group dont seem to be bothered by this. Secondly, I am single have no children and never married and I almost feel as though the the people running the group suspect am gay. Iam not by the way. I had a girlfriend when i started the course but dont anymore but I have no desire to talk about her or explain to anyone else in the group. After all am attending rcia for me not for a girlfriend. I think they are suspicious of me and the whole thing is making me feel awkward. I read about how candidtates are supposed to deepen there involvement with the church so I asked if there was anythng more i should be doing. I felt as though by asking this the catechists thought i was trying toi score points not as i was genuinely interested in progressing my journey on the course. The whole thing is making me feel uncomfortable. Whenever i see the priest i feel nervous and self conscious and i dont know what to do.

Please help.
 
One thing I would recommend is that any time you want to talk to a priest, call and make an appointment. They are usually extraordinaly busy, what with weddings, funerals, Masses, confessions, and everything gets even crazier during Advent and Lent. It’s not that they aren’t interested in talking to you, it’s just that they often only have a few spare minutes between one thing and the next. Just to give an example, the other day, daily Mass finished about 9:10 and a funeral was scheduled to begin at 10:00.

I have been a Catholic for nearly 9 years now, and I am just now getting used to the fact that I can literally say anything and it remains private. Even outside of the Confessional.

As far as getting involved goes, for a Candidate that means doing things like attending Stations of the Cross during Lent, if you can, or daily Mass, and other things like that, community things. You can’t do anything like be an usher or a greeter or things along those lines until you are received into the Church.

Don’t worry about what others think about your journey. Your journey is just that - your journey. When I went through RCIA like you most of the people there were couples. I was by myself because my husband couldn’t make the classes because of his work schedule. Hang in there. If you are coming into the Church at Easter, you only have about 6 weeks left.

Welcome home. In spite of all the difficulties you may be having, the Catholic Church is a wonderful place to be!
I am praying God gives you a most blessed Lenten season!
Kris
 
StranraerHibby and PeanutButter26 -

First, welcome to the CAF!

I wish you all the best on both your journeys to the Faith. You are both in my prayers!

God Bless
 
StranraerHibby and PeanutButter: I am always excited to share my experiences with those contemplating the Catholic faith. From the outset let me first say, do not let anything deter you from completing your journey. I waited nearly sixty-one years and entry into the Catholic Church at Easter Vigil, 2005 was one of the best things that ever happened to me. I was raised Bible Church/Baptist and married a “cradle Catholic”. We raised our son and daughter Catholic, but I never had the slightest desire to convert for a variety of reasons. First, nobody every explained the Mass to me. It all seemed so robotic and unnecessarily full of ritual. When I finally elected to “investigate” what Catholicism was all about, I told my immediate family that I was not doing it for them which, of course, would be the wrong reason, rather doing it for my own edification. Shortly after joining RCIA, I soon discovered why Catholics do what they do at Mass, where each step of the Mass was based biblically and in tradition. Week by week the fog lifted and I began “connecting the dots.” Each week at RCIA I was more eager than the week before to learn more and more. The Eucharist changed my life forever. The flame continues to burn in a variety of different ways through service to the church. All I can do is encourage both of you to get actively involved in RCIA and read as much as you can to supplement your RCIA sessions. Almost anything authored by Scott Hahn is a good bet, as well as C.S. Lewis and Peter Krefft. Submit yourselves to the Holy Spirit and you’ll be sure to receive all the benefits your hearts desire. I pray that, as it was for me, becoming Catholic will be the greatest gift you give yourselves. May God richly bless both of your journeys.
 
PeanutButter26 said:
Hi I’ve just joined the site and wanted to say hi and get some opinions/support hopefully from some other rcia people and see what you thought of my experience.
I moved to a new city and decided as I’d been thinking about the catholic faith for some time, I’d make contact with the local priest (of a relatively poor area) for a chat.
I went to mass a few times to observe and approached the priest after and asked him if i could meet for a chat. I subsequently did and after meeting him and asking questions for an hour or so, he became curious about me and my background (obviously not used to people wanting to talk about the faith).
I did not feel as though i was obliged to disclose all my personal history to a priest i’d just met on a first enquiry and probably appeared a little sheepish on explaining my life the last few years. For the record, I was a former police officer who had left the job after becoming ill, moved to new area for a new career, become ill again and finally got myself back together again on a third attempt. I can see that perhaps I had nothing to fear from discussing this with the priest but old habits of remaining reserved and maintaining my own privacy to strangers still operated within me. The second time i went to go and the see the same priest, he said he wass busy and that was it, I never went back. A while later i heard about an rcia at another church not so far away from the first church and decided to attended.
Am still attending but am finding the experience quite stressful. Most of the other people in the group are there as their wives/girlfriends want them there and genuine expressions of faith/enquiry from my other group members seem to be limited. The people running the group dont seem to be bothered by this. Secondly, I am single have no children and never married and I almost feel as though the the people running the group suspect am gay. Iam not by the way. I had a girlfriend when i started the course but dont anymore but I have no desire to talk about her or explain to anyone else in the group. After all am attending rcia for me not for a girlfriend. I think they are suspicious of me and the whole thing is making me feel awkward. I read about how candidtates are supposed to deepen there involvement with the church so I asked if there was anythng more i should be doing. I felt as though by asking this the catechists thought i was trying toi score points not as i was genuinely interested in progressing my journey on the course. The whole thing is making me feel uncomfortable. Whenever i see the priest i feel nervous and self conscious and i dont know what to do.

Please help.
Click to expand...
Hi !

Well - congratulations, first of all. I went through RCIA in a small group at my (Catholic) college so it wasn’t too awkward and most of the time we had to be efficient with staying on task for the lesson (time wise due to all our schedules) but could speak with Sister C. or Brother T. at any time if we needed.

I’ve been in other church settings where people really do the 50 questions stuff & I always say share what you are comfortable in sharing and keep what you are not. Don’t worry about what others think so much. I am sure that you will be more comfortable with interacting as time goes on. As long as you know you are making this step for you, that is all that matters. You are there to get right with God, and for the right reasons.

Awkwardness about disclosing stuff about yourself to a Priest- yes, it is very awkward. That is one of the reasons that I ironically like Confession :). From my own Protestant background - it is easier to “personally” Confess but I find that getting the interaction/guidance is helpful especially from someone that speaks with you regularly. The Priest is not there to make you feel bad about anything, he definitely keeps everything confidential and usually Priests try to go out of their way to make time for you if you need to speak about anything, especially as a newbie.

I am new in my parish and I have let everyone know that I’d love to help out with anything that needs to be done and can learn quickly if there something that needs to be done that I don’t know how to do. Everyone was like “don’t say that too much around here, we will definitely take you up on that lol”

In regards to settling in to a church home- sometimes if it feels like you just don’t feel “at home” in one parish then do try another, but give it some time. Where I am originally from, I did hop around a bit before finding a Parish with a Priest that I was comfortable with after finishing RCIA. With where I am now, there are only two Catholic churches in the whole own, so I’d say that made it a whole LOT easier!

I’d say you are on the right track, get everything out of the course that you can, and don’t be afraid to ask questions. The leaders are there for your support and to help you in your journey to the Faith. There are a lot of great experts on this forum 👍 and I’ve also noticed a few Priests that answer questions on here also (usually they have “Fr.” in front of their username).
 
RocketRM said:
StranraerHibby and PeanutButter26 -

First, welcome to the CAF!

I wish you all the best on both your journeys to the Faith. You are both in my prayers!

God Bless
Click to expand...
Thank you brother God Bless you and I wish you a peaceful and uplifting period of Lent.

PB26
 
usemelord said:
StranraerHibby and PeanutButter: I am always excited to share my experiences with those contemplating the Catholic faith. From the outset let me first say, do not let anything deter you from completing your journey. I waited nearly sixty-one years and entry into the Catholic Church at Easter Vigil, 2005 was one of the best things that ever happened to me. I was raised Bible Church/Baptist and married a “cradle Catholic”. We raised our son and daughter Catholic, but I never had the slightest desire to convert for a variety of reasons. First, nobody every explained the Mass to me. It all seemed so robotic and unnecessarily full of ritual. When I finally elected to “investigate” what Catholicism was all about, I told my immediate family that I was not doing it for them which, of course, would be the wrong reason, rather doing it for my own edification. Shortly after joining RCIA, I soon discovered why Catholics do what they do at Mass, where each step of the Mass was based biblically and in tradition. Week by week the fog lifted and I began “connecting the dots.” Each week at RCIA I was more eager than the week before to learn more and more. The Eucharist changed my life forever. The flame continues to burn in a variety of different ways through service to the church. All I can do is encourage both of you to get actively involved in RCIA and read as much as you can to supplement your RCIA sessions. Almost anything authored by Scott Hahn is a good bet, as well as C.S. Lewis and Peter Krefft. Submit yourselves to the Holy Spirit and you’ll be sure to receive all the benefits your hearts desire. I pray that, as it was for me, becoming Catholic will be the greatest gift you give yourselves. May God richly bless both of your journeys.
Click to expand...
God bless you. I wish you a peaceful and uplifting period of Lent

PB26
 
choliks said:
This is actually not encouraged.
Click to expand...
The OP is in the UK. Receiving a blessing is actually encouraged by the bishops of England and Wales, and I don’t see that Scotland would be different.
 
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