My First Reconciliation

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Hey, I’m 16 and receiving my first reconciliation this Monday. I’m really nervous. How do I word my sins? Like for mas.tur.bat.ion, lu.st.ful thoughts, etc.? Do I just go ahead and say “These are my sins… mast.ur.bat.ion…” or do I word it as “self-gratification”? But then the priest might ask what kind of self-gratification or something? Ack, I’m nervous! Please pray for me.

God Bless,
Grant
 
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JMJ_Pinoy:
Hey, I’m 16 and receiving my first reconciliation this Monday. I’m really nervous. How do I word my sins? Like for mas.tur.bat.ion, lu.st.ful thoughts, etc.? Do I just go ahead and say “These are my sins… mast.ur.bat.ion…” or do I word it as “self-gratification”? But then the priest might ask what kind of self-gratification or something? Ack, I’m nervous! Please pray for me.

God Bless,
Grant
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I’ll keep you in my prayers as you prepare to make your first confession.
First of all, relax. There is no sin you have committed that the priest hasn’t heard before. He is there to heal you.
I suggest you check this website, catholic.com, EWTN and other orthodox websites for a guide to confession. I would also go to a good Catholic bookstore and find a book that helps you examine your conscience.
Priests know all the terms for sins against the 6th and 9th Commandments. I wouldn’t worry about the terminology, I would give thanks to God for His forgiveness after you make your confession and firmly resolve to amend my life.
Pax tecum.
 
Look Grant… 😃 yours is not the first confession that that priest has ever heard and it won’t be the last. Ten minutes afterward he won’t even remember it…in part because Christ doesn’t either (by His own choice). Just lay it all out there…realize that you’re really whispering into the ear of Christ. Don’tcha suppose that Our Lord already knows what’s up w/you? Dig up the story of the Woman at the Well, The prodigal son, and the woman taken in adultery in your Bible okay. (John chapter 4, Luke 15:11-32, and John 8:1-11) See if that doesn’t give you a hint about the God that you are going to confess to. You’ll find that the priest will be the very same way, but listen carefully to what he says. Do you know the Act of Contrition?

Act of Contrition
O my God, I am heartfully sorry for having offended thee, and I detest all my sins because of Thy just punishment, but most of all because I have offended Thee my God, Who is all good and deserving of all my love. I firmly resolve, with the help of Thy grace, to sin no more, and to avoid the near occasion of sin, Amen.

Read that and understand just what it’s saying. Reconcilliation requires real sorrow for one’s sins…not just embarrassment y’know? We need to plan to not do stuff again. Consider a crucifix…or think of The Passion if you saw it…THAT’s the price of my sins…so every timeI look at my crucifix, it makes me not wanna add to that suffering. Does that make some sense to ya?

Don’t freak out…the priest is just as human as you are and he won’t laugh or wise crack you ar dump on ya. You’re gonna do fine dude…I know. Imagine my first confession on return to the faith after 34 years! Was I nervous? yeah. Was it great and worth it? ABSOLUTELY! I mean if ya wanted to and ya think you’re gonna have trouble telling him…just tell him how nervous ya are. Maybe even write it down and hand it to him. I promise he’ll be very cool. He’ll know that you’re nervous anyway as soon as you say “Bless me father for I have sinned. This is my FIRST confession” 👍
You can count on my prayers Grant. I promise you that buddy. it’s gonna be fine…great really. Just promise to come back here and tell us how great it really was…okay so that somebody else your age can see it and be encouraged too.
Pax vobiscum,
 
Just say it like it is, say you masturbated and had lustfull thoughts or whatever. Be as honest and straightforward as you can, then when you’re finished you’ll know that gave a good confession and that your sins are forgiven. Don’t worry about forgetting anything, that happens and as long as you don’t deliberatly hold any mortal sins back they are still forgiven, the venial sins don’t have to be told , to be forgiven, just be sorry and have a firm purpose of amendment, and they will be forgiven.

When your confession is over you will feel like a great weight has lifted off of you. Also don’t fret that you are scarred and nervous, the more nervous you are now the more relieved you’ll feel when it’s over.

God bless you,

Danny
 
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DJJG:
Just say it like it is…

…When your confession is over you will feel like a great weight has lifted off of you.

God bless you,

Danny
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Face your fears and dont let them control you, say it like it is and never be scared to go back in the future.
This might sound scary, but the point of confession is to face your shame and embarassment and let God do the healing. I dont remember who said it but one of the Early Church Fathers said something like “the priest is like a doctor, he is there to heal you, but he cant help you if he doesnt know whats ailing you.” Let it out and trust in Jesus.

You came this far, go the rest of the mile
 
Thanks for all the advice, it’s greatly appreciated! 🙂 God Bless!
 
Father Larry Richards, on his ‘Confession’ cd, suggests using the term ‘I’ve been impure with myself’ and says ‘every’ priest will know what you mean. I hope this helps you!
 
Since this is your first confession… you can tell the priest in the confessional that this your first and he will help you along… It can be SCARY but you take a breathier and realize that Priest is just the proxy and Jesus present in the confessional and waiting to give Mercy.
 
yeah, don’t beat around the bush or anything - just try to be straightforward and direct. I know when a sin is really embarassing you might feel a bit choked up and stuff, so if you add to that using some flowery langauge to describe your sin, the poor priest may not know quite what you’re getting at. Just try to speak naturally.
 
I was thinking about this too and it seemed overwhelming to think of taking a first confession and having to tell him every one of your sins.

You could always call it “solitary sin” I’ve heard people here refer to “self pleasure” as that.
 
Dear Grant,
You are great! 🙂 What a special person you are. You really made me smile. Did I mention to you that I have two lovely daughters? They’re young now, but they’re real beauties.
 
Thanks again for all the advice, it’s been really helpful! 🙂 My first confession’s tomorrow night, so I hope it goes well.

God Bless!
 
You’ll do fine. Remember that the priest has heard everything. Mast-ur-ba-tion is pretty run of the mill, dime a dozen type sin. :rolleyes: And who hasn’t had a lustful thought or two?. :o
 
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Shinobu:
Please let us know how it went! I wish you the best, have courage!
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Thanks! It went good. It was a Lenten Penance Celebration, so we lined up, like we’d do if we were receiving communion, to confess. We did our first confession as a community. I confessed that ‘I’ve been impure with myself’ and the priest didn’t ask about it, so I guess he knew what I meant. 🙂 I’m receiving my first communion on April 3.

God Bless.
 
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