My friend has imaginary friends?

[TheRealJuliane]

I supose I just felt a little…miffed. Perhaps it wasn’t a fair emotion to have, but frankly, it still just strikes me as a little…odd. I don’t know. I’m about as middle of the road and normal as they come. Find family, normal everything. Yeah, she’s very artistic. Paints and is an aspiring novelist. And like I said, I know her home life wasn’t great growing up. No mother, grew up with her grandmother, idolized a father who barely acknowledged her. But I thought she’d gotten past all that, I guess. Maybe that’s why it surprised me.

Aspiring novelist, not surprised that her imaginary life is vivid. I will confess something - I see things when I close my eyes. Right now, I have a dark palomino horse named Durango. He has a white blaze on his nose. He shows up when I call for him. Yes, he’s imaginary. But his name and his image came unbidden to me one night. I enjoy him, and perhaps one day, I will meet him (I kind of think there is a Durango out there).

Also, when my husband and I have an argument, I will “undo” it with my imagining of what he COULD have said, to make things better. I put words in his mouth, and I see it down to his expressions and his physical touches.

So am I crazy too? I guess my background was pretty dysfunctional. I like to think that I am somewhat creative, though, and the things I see at night are pretty cool.

 

[Andre1000]

Just had a thought. If your friend has imaginary friends, can you be sure you are not imaginary?

Yes, that was also my concern. However, a bigger problem is: What if the imaginary friend has another real friend you do not like.

 

[LilMissyMary]

Gosh, I hope I’m real

In all seriousness, while I still don’t really uderstand, I don’t think it’s my place to judge, nor do I feel as uneasy with the idea. She doesn’t seem to want to talk about it much now…my fault, for how I reacted. She did share that her primary “friend” is just a nice, fatherly presence…her real dad wasn’t a loving person. While he supported the family financially, and I’m sure he loved her, growing up I could always tell he never gave her any of the love or affection she wanted. I was really glad when she got away from that. Perhaps it’s just comforting to her, and providing her with something she needs. I do wish though that she’d think about talking to someone…

 

[Woolybabe]

I have imaginary friends, I also have an imaginary daughter! I talk to my imaginary friends and my imaginary daughter a lot. I find that it helps me to sort out my feelings and thoughts. If I am trying to work through a problem or a feeling then I imagine my friend has the problem/ feeling and advise them on what to do. It might sound mad to a lot of people, maybe it is! but it really does help. My imaginary daughter has twin babies, so as you can tell, even though they are not real, they do have their own story. My husband doesn’t have imaginary friends, though he knows about mine and my daughter/grandchildren, but he sometimes says things that to other people might sound weird and mad. He had an accident and ended up in a coma, though he is obviously no longer in the coma, he sometimes tells people, that maybe he is still in a coma and we are all a dream. I just ask him to dream me thinner, and fitter and in less pain! I have only told a few of my friends that I have imaginary friends, and daughter, but the ones that I have told have been ones that I know I can trust. So please be glad that your friend feels that she can trust you. Another poster said that she doesn’t know any adults that have imaginary friends, but maybe she does! they just don’t tell her. There is a lot of things that I don’t tell people, so who knows what others are not telling me. I wonder if maybe more adults do have imaginary friends but don’t admit to it because people might not understand. As adults we have learnt to conform to society whereas when we were children we were free to be who we are. They say that childhood is the best time of your life, could it be because we don’t have to wear virtual straigh jackets?

 

[EasterJoy]

Cartoon in today’s paper (Bizarro):

Father to daughter: I’m worried about you, sweetie. You’re too old to have imaginary friends.

Daughter, hunched over computer: It’s called “Facebook”, Dad.

 

[jmcrae]

Most of us are odd in one way or the other.

I bite my fingernails which, if you think about it, is pretty odd- like self-injurious. I have tried quitting but have been unable.

Many, most?, of us have some personal oddities.

Then again; I’m a therapist and find this stuff really fascinating. I’ve never had a client (adult" who had an imaginary friend though. It would be interesting for me if I did however.

My father had imaginary friends (he called them “The Bears”) all his life. He told stories about them to us kids all the time, but he never thought they were actually real. He was an artist, and he was always doodling pictures of them, although he never included them in any of his serious work.

He did mention them to a therapist once, and the therapist wanted him to get rid of the drawings and stop telling the stories - so I told him to find a different therapist. He did, and as far as I know he never mentioned them in therapy again - “The Bears” became our secret, and he told us we were never to speak of them to anyone. (He has passed away, so I think it’s okay now.)