My friend wants me to go to his Non-Denom Men's retreat!!

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What should I do?? He is really pressuring me to sign up and go. He got kind of offended when I said they aren’t like my Daddy’s retreats where at the end of the day you sit around and drink beer and tell stories.

Anyways, I told him I was very apprehensive. I play softball with his team and since my Parish does not have a softball team. I told him I don’t want anyone trying to convert me and he promised me they won;t they all know how devout of a Catholic I am. He said all they do is probably the same stuff they do at a Catholic Retreat minus the beer drinking. He said basically they sit around and talk about sports, play golf and watch ballgames during free time. Yeah there are some times when they dive into scripture and it’s not like I have to participate. Should I go or run miles the other direction?? HELP!!!
 
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uofl19:
What should I do?? He is really pressuring me to sign up and go. He got kind of offended when I said they aren’t like my Daddy’s retreats where at the end of the day you sit around and drink beer and tell stories.

Anyways, I told him I was very apprehensive. I play softball with his team and since my Parish does not have a softball team. I told him I don’t want anyone trying to convert me and he promised me they won;t they all know how devout of a Catholic I am. He said all they do is probably the same stuff they do at a Catholic Retreat minus the beer drinking. He said basically they sit around and talk about sports, play golf and watch ballgames during free time. Yeah there are some times when they dive into scripture and it’s not like I have to participate. Should I go or run miles the other direction?? HELP!!!
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There really should be no pressure from a friend to go to something like that. Just say no, that is unless you want to dive into the wolf pack for some debate and appologetics. Sounds like your friend wants to convert you deep down, (could be wrong).

-D
 
I’ve been on non-denom retreats (women’s) that were awesome… but I’ve also been on one with a speaker who spent alot of time bashing Catholics. I guess if you know that going in… and you’re willing to stand up for your faith then maybe it would be harmless. But what if they DID bash Catholics & it made you so mad that you felt like you couldn’t play softball with them anymore… wouldn’t that be a drag? So… hmmm… I’m not so sure. OH… and him saying that it’s mostly fun, watching sports etc. HA! What kind of non-denom church is that? More likely it’s hours of heavy duty Bible & lots of praise & worship. The other stuff is is very minimal.
 
If you don’t want to go, don’t. If your friend doesn’t understand too bad. If he gets mad at you, is that really Christian behavior? Would he go on a Catholic retreat with you? Your friend is probably under some pressure to find as many people that he can find to attend. My wife and children attend a “Non-Denom” (really Evangelical Church) and my wife asked that I attend the mens retreat to support my sons. I’ve gone both times and it’s really no big deal, other than I couldn’t find a place to attend Mass nearby. I had fun playing basketball/football and fishing with the guys, but sitting through many hours of preaching, always on guard, filtering out the truth from the non-truth was very tiring. Remember they think that you need to be saved, so they’ll do whatever they can to be nice to you. Which isn’t so bad other than it is non-geniune. If it wasn’t for my sons, there is no way that I would go.
 
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uofl19:
What should I do?? He is really pressuring me to sign up and go. He got kind of offended when I said they aren’t like my Daddy’s retreats where at the end of the day you sit around and drink beer and tell stories.

Anyways, I told him I was very apprehensive. I play softball with his team and since my Parish does not have a softball team. I told him I don’t want anyone trying to convert me and he promised me they won;t they all know how devout of a Catholic I am. He said all they do is probably the same stuff they do at a Catholic Retreat minus the beer drinking. He said basically they sit around and talk about sports, play golf and watch ballgames during free time. Yeah there are some times when they dive into scripture and it’s not like I have to participate. Should I go or run miles the other direction?? HELP!!!
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Depends, if you don’t mind me asking, how strong do you feel you are in the faith? If you believe you can withstand it, then it presents a great opportunity to witness. Bring a rosary or breviary and spend a few minutes in quite prayer while at the retreat. Doubtless this “non-denom” retreat will be full of people mis informed about Mother Church. You have a wonderful opportunity to set these right. Perhaps bring a male friend who is very strong in the faith (under cover seminarian?) Anyway, just my thoughts, but I’m influenced by the fact I’ve been to stuff like that and…bleh. Gimme a latin mass anyday! 👍
 
I doubt they would bash Catholics. If there was any thought of my friend that they might do that. I doubt he would ask me to go. I will say he is one of those type that probably deep down would love to see me more involved at this Church because I am his best friend and he would have someone he would enjoy being around more. My wife goes there but I don’t get involved in the least except attend with her.

He did say there really isn’t a whole lot of Preaching and Bible Study. I don’t know if he is saying that to get me to come or not. I told him I would feel very awkward if there was praise and worship and stuff because I would just stand there and wish I was somewhere else.
 
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uofl19:
What should I do?? He is really pressuring me to sign up and go. He got kind of offended when I said they aren’t like my Daddy’s retreats where at the end of the day you sit around and drink beer and tell stories.

Anyways, I told him I was very apprehensive. I play softball with his team and since my Parish does not have a softball team. I told him I don’t want anyone trying to convert me and he promised me they won;t they all know how devout of a Catholic I am. He said all they do is probably the same stuff they do at a Catholic Retreat minus the beer drinking. He said basically they sit around and talk about sports, play golf and watch ballgames during free time. Yeah there are some times when they dive into scripture and it’s not like I have to participate. Should I go or run miles the other direction?? HELP!!!
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If your apprehensive maybe don’t go. If it were me, I’d go. Of course I’m an odd ball that loves to go to these things and then point out the various inconsistencies I always seem to find in the teachings.
 
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uofl19:
I doubt they would bash Catholics. If there was any thought of my friend that they might do that. I doubt he would ask me to go. I will say he is one of those type that probably deep down would love to see me more involved at this Church because I am his best friend and he would have someone he would enjoy being around more. My wife goes there but I don’t get involved in the least except attend with her.

He did say there really isn’t a whole lot of Preaching and Bible Study. I don’t know if he is saying that to get me to come or not. I told him I would feel very awkward if there was praise and worship and stuff because I would just stand there and wish I was somewhere else.
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Umm, in all politeness, you attend a protestant church…regularly? :bigyikes: Now, I may be judging harshly, but usually the only things that non-denom’s have in mind when asking you to attend, well anything of their’s is your conversion. Why because, then you could give testimonies. Seen it happen. Unless one can bring others from their ignorance to the truth there is no good reason one should expose himself to their beliefs. Peace and God’s mercy.
 
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b_justb:
If your apprehensive maybe don’t go. If it were me, I’d go. Of course I’m an odd ball that loves to go to these things and then point out the various inconsistencies I always seem to find in the teachings.
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I like you! That was my plan later this month seraphic smile
 
That’s the thing. I am probably not as well versed into the my Faith as I should be. I can see them asking me why do you do this? Why do you do that?? Where is it in the Bible? Then I would be like UUUUUUHHHHHHHHH!! Not everything. I can handle fundamental Catholic teachings but some of the more intrinsic stuff I may be in trouble.

If they talk Fantasty Football, NFL, MLB playoffs, College Football which he says they do then Great!! However, it’s like the 1 poster said digging DEEEEEP into the Bible that will make me want to Hitch Hike out of there!!
 
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uofl19:
That’s the thing. I am probably not as well versed into the my Faith as I should be. I can see them asking me why do you do this? Why do you do that?? Where is it in the Bible? Then I would be like UUUUUUHHHHHHHHH!! Not everything. I can handle fundamental Catholic teachings but some of the more intrinsic stuff I may be in trouble.

If they talk Fantasty Football, NFL, MLB playoffs, College Football which he says they do then Great!! However, it’s like the 1 poster said digging DEEEEEP into the Bible that will make me want to Hitch Hike out of there!!
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2 Choices, go to www.catholic.com, read their library (doesn’t take too long).
or say never mind and prepare for the next one.🙂 You got such a great chance to witness bro, don’t pass it up!
 
Twitzed, I’m in the same shoes that Love @B is in. I’m Catholic and my Wife is a member of this Church which by the way this same friend I’m takling about set up up 4 yrs ago. Maybe back then he set us up in hoping I would convert but I think he has given up now. HONESTLY!!

So to answer your Question. I do attend semi-regularly. I attend Mass regularly though. I only go when my wife wants to go. Lately we haven’t gone much because of our new baby because she has been so fatigued.
 
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uofl19:
What should I do?? He is really pressuring me to sign up and go. He got kind of offended when I said they aren’t like my Daddy’s retreats where at the end of the day you sit around and drink beer and tell stories.

HELP!!!
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you don’t say how old you are, but if you, friend and other participants are underage it is a criminal act for the church or group sponsoring the retreat to serve alcohol. you say your friend is pressuring you. do you ordinarily make your life decisions based on peer pressure? if so, you may want to address that problem first. maybe a retreat in your own church on the true meaning of friendship would be in order.
 
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uofl19:
That’s the thing. I am probably not as well versed into the my Faith as I should be. I can see them asking me why do you do this? Why do you do that?? Where is it in the Bible? Then I would be like UUUUUUHHHHHHHHH!! Not everything. I can handle fundamental Catholic teachings but some of the more intrinsic stuff I may be in trouble.

If they talk Fantasty Football, NFL, MLB playoffs, College Football which he says they do then Great!! However, it’s like the 1 poster said digging DEEEEEP into the Bible that will make me want to Hitch Hike out of there!!
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Be not afriad.
There 's nothing wrong with a “I don’t know, but I’ll find out.” Then of course, you have to get answers and get back to whoever. Fortunately there is a great internet site called Catholic Answers and they will help you to get clear, correct, direct, and wonderfully referenced answers.
 
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twiztedseraph:
I like you! That was my plan later this month seraphic smile
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Most excellent insert Simpsons’ M. Burns spider finger emote here
 
I’m 32 years old!! I just say that to him because he thinks drinking a sip of alcohol is a sin. He is one of those who thinks Jesus turned water into Grape Juice which he even battles people on that in his own Church.

So I say that to get under his skin.🙂
 
If you’re not feeling too centered in the Catholic faith, my only advice is to be aware of the impact of being around these guys for hours and hours at a time in a retreat setting. It could be easy to lose your spiritual bearings and start believing that you need to “accept Jesus” and be born again.

My fiancee was attending a non-denom church in addition to going to Mass, simply because she liked the energy and simplicity of their teachings. She even got involved in one of their infamous “small groups.” Ultimately, she stopped attending because people kept asking her if she’s accepted Jesus and they wanted her to get baptized and “born again.”

Even though it was subtle, there was a definite anti-Catholic bias, even though it was well cloaked. When I went to their website, their tag line was, “church for people who’ve given up on church.” They then went on to talk about how dry and boring “traditional church” is, and how they provide a fun, entertaining and multi-media approach to worship.

Really, it comes down to this: “We’ll keep you entertained and feeling good about yourself. We won’t make you feel like you sin or need to do anything other than accept Jesus in your heart and you’ll be saved.”

Puhleease…clearly a church for our relativistic and TV-oriented culture.

Be careful out there! 👍

Many blessings,
JP Augustine
 
Tht was great advice your gave JP!! HA HA LOL!! in regards to those infamous “small groups” you are talking about. Those are called Cell groups!!

Oh my GOSH! I can’t begin to tell you how many times I have been asked to join a particular “Cell Group” How great they are and they are there own little family.

I actually went with my wife about 3 yrs ago before we were married. IT WAS AWFUL!! They went around and if you wanted to particpate you could. I did not!! When these 2 guys talked about something they regretted. They both talked about regretting going to a Catholic College. They did not say Catholic College but I knew where they went to school at and what they were talking about. What they said was they regrett going to a “Liberal School” Let me tell you Bellarmine University here in Louisville is NOT LIBERAL!! It’s a PHENOMINAL School! When I heard that. I was like I will never come to one of these again!!
 
If you want to go, go…especially if these guys already know you are a strong Catholic, and you friend has promised that there will be no pressure on you.

My family attends the same type of church, and I regularly do things there…Even take trips with a particualar group…I know some of them want me to be “saved”, but no one says anything. I make too big a deal out of being Catholic for that…They all know who and what I am…

You just have to trust your gut feelings about the whole thing. I’d probably go, because I fully understand their theology (I am a convert), and am pretty stong in my own faith. To tell the truth, the more I hang out with my evangelical friends and ocassionally attend services with my family, the more Catholic I become. Strange, but so true.
 
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uofl19:
He did say there really isn’t a whole lot of Preaching and Bible Study. I don’t know if he is saying that to get me to come or not. I told him I would feel very awkward if there was praise and worship and stuff because I would just stand there and wish I was somewhere else.
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That’s EXACTLY the feeling that I had for most of the weekend, just standing there and wishing I was somewhere else. You might want to ask your friend for the schedule to give you and idea of how much, praise and worship and small group time that there was. I think that it is good that you attend with your wife sometimes. I asked my priest about it and he said that if you attend Mass then it’s OK. Luckily (for me) I’m unable to because of time conflicts.

One last thought, why would you want to go? To support your friend? For spiritual reasons? To have a good time?
If to support your friend, you’ll have to realize that you are giving up time with your wife and child and you’ll (possibly) have a lot of time being miserable standing around feeling awkward.
If for spiritual reasons, you’d be much better off going to a Catholic retreat.
If to have a good time, then I’d check the schedule to see how much “play” time there was.
 
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