My Grandfather possibly going to baptize my grandmother

  • Thread starter Thread starter dje101
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
D

dje101

Guest
So, my grandmother was hospitalized and released yesterday. I spoke with my mom about whether or not she was baptized and she said she (grandmother) had not been and she and grandfather do not believe it is necessary to get to heaven. I explained to my mom a few clear verses from the Bibke, and I guess she passed it along to my grandmother. She (grandmother) is thinking about having my grandfather baptize her on Saturday before my mom leaves town. Family is not Catholic, and I think she may just be doing this because she knows how important it is to me. Any advice?

Basically, what I’m looking for is
  1. should I encourage a minister to do it instead of her husband? They live in a somewhat rural part of the state, so getting to a church may not be easy for them, especially given that she was just released from the hospital and is still sick
  2. assuming he does it with correct form, will this be a valid baptism? I’m concerned about her doing it just for me, but it’s hard to convince someone to do “what the church intends” when they don’t accept the church in the first place.
Thanks.
 
dje101 said:
but it’s hard to convince someone to do “what the church intends” when they don’t accept the church in the first place.
Click to expand...
I think thats your answer. If there isn’t an immediate possibility of death, then I would think the proper form of baptism would be through a minister of the Church. The fact that your grandparents are not Catholic apparently have desire to be, well…I would think that really complicates the issue.
 
dje101 said:
So, my grandmother was hospitalized and released yesterday. I spoke with my mom about whether or not she was baptized and she said she (grandmother) had not been and she and grandfather do not believe it is necessary to get to heaven. I explained to my mom a few clear verses from the Bibke, and I guess she passed it along to my grandmother. She (grandmother) is thinking about having my grandfather baptize her on Saturday before my mom leaves town. Family is not Catholic, and I think she may just be doing this because she knows how important it is to me. Any advice?

Basically, what I’m looking for is
  1. should I encourage a minister to do it instead of her husband? They live in a somewhat rural part of the state, so getting to a church may not be easy for them, especially given that she was just released from the hospital and is still sick
  2. assuming he does it with correct form, will this be a valid baptism? I’m concerned about her doing it just for me, but it’s hard to convince someone to do “what the church intends” when they don’t accept the church in the first place.
Thanks.
Click to expand...
why don’t you call a priest and have him come and assess the situation?

it’s hard to really know, I am not 100% clear on what you really mean by your post. so they are not catholic but you are? do they go to some other church? have they ever expressed interest in being catholic?

call your priest and ask. I am not sure if they are really only doing it for you or if that qualifies as sufficient intention
 
Tim_D said:
I think thats your answer. If there isn’t an immediate possibility of death, then I would think the proper form of baptism would be through a minister of the Church. The fact that your grandparents are not Catholic apparently have desire to be, well…I would think that really complicates the issue.
Click to expand...
Well, they don’t have a desire to be Catholic. They’ve had the idea that we worship Mary and have added books to the Bible like the LDS have. I’ve slowly been trying to clear that stuff up without being confrontational, but it’s difficult having those discussions over the phone sometimes. They are " Bible believing Christians".
 
angell1 said:
why don’t you call a priest and have him come and assess the situation?

it’s hard to really know, I am not 100% clear on what you really mean by your post. so they are not catholic but you are? do they go to some other church? have they ever expressed interest in being catholic?

call your priest and ask. I am not sure if they are really only doing it for you or if that qualifies as sufficient intention
Click to expand...
Sorry, I’ll try to clarify.

My grandparents are not, never have been, and (to the best of my knowledge) have no desire to be Catholic. With the exception of a distant cousin on the other side of the country whom I have only heard of and never met, I am the only Catholic in my family. My grandparents are “bible believing Christians” and have not attended a church in sometime because, among other reasons, their age and the distance they’d have to drive with their limited income for gas. They live 5 hrs from me and I am not there currently, but my mother is because my grandmother was hospitalized yesterday.

Before she was released, I asked my mother if my grandmother was baptized, which my mother said that she wasn’t and that they (grandparents) don’t believe that it will have any bearing on whether or not she gets to heaven. I said that is a dangerous assumption because Christ explicitly commanded it. I sent her some scripture passages to back it up.

Over the day yesterday they spoke about it and my grandmother is considering getting baptized, but her intention is possibly about doing it because it means a lot to me. She apparently said that she’ll talk to grandpa and just have him do it.

Via text, I told my mom the proper form, and also that she needs to have the right intention, that being reborn in Christ, have her sins wiped away, etc., all the things that baptism does. If she doesn’t do it for those reasons, then it’s not good enough. More scripture verses accompanied that.

Hope that clarifies things. At this point, I’m just hoping that it’s done with right form, right intention, and that it’ll be efficacious because of Christ and their (hopefully correct) desire.
 
Anyone can baptize anyone in dire circumstances, they only need use the trinitarian baptism formula, “I baptize you in the name of the Father, and in the name of the Son, and in the name of the Holy Spirit.” It’s not the holiness or worthiness of the baptizer that makes the difference, it’s God that is working there.

That being said it does not seem to be a dire circumstance as death isn’t happening in the next few minutes/hours. I would talk to a priest, maybe you can convince them to be baptized by a priest. I’m afraid I’m out of advice, this is beyond me.
 
Your grandparents are not Catholic so the laws of the church do not apply to them.

If your grandmother wants to be a Christian, believes in Christ, and wants to be baptized by all means your grandfather can baptize her. If they are affiliated with a church if any kind, the minister Of that church could be consulted.
 
USMC_Convert said:
I would talk to a priest, maybe you can convince them to be baptized by a priest. I’m afraid I’m out of advice, this is beyond me.
Click to expand...
Why would a Catholic priest baptize someone who isn’t Catholic and has no intention of being one?
 
Tim_D said:
Why would a Catholic priest baptize someone who isn’t Catholic and has no intention of being one?
Click to expand...
I said maybe you can talk them into it, in other words maybe she would consider joining the Catholic Church. Why is it you find something to argue about with everyone?
 
USMC_Convert said:
I said maybe you can talk them into it, in other words maybe she would consider joining the Catholic Church.
Click to expand...
The OP has already stated that his grandparents are not Catholic and have no interest in becoming Catholic.
USMC_Convert said:
Why is it you find something to argue about with everyone?
Click to expand...
This is called a discussion forum. It is supposed to be a place where people discuss things of a common interest. If someone says something that is factually wrong or implies something that is incorrect, then I don’t see a problem with pointing that out.

Do you think that this forum should be dedicated to everyone saying anything that comes into their mind without challenge? Perhaps our time would be better spent on the more innocuous things in life…like maybe posting pictures of cats? 🤷
 
I would ask,….why do all these miracles over the world only happen in the Catholic Church, including eastern orthodox. Fatima, Guadalupe, Lanciano, all the incorrupt saints,……is someone trying to tell me something? 🙂
 
Tim_D said:
The OP has already stated that his grandparents are not Catholic and have no interest in becoming Catholic.

This is called a discussion forum. It is supposed to be a place where people discuss things of a common interest. If someone says something that is factually wrong or implies something that is incorrect, then I don’t see a problem with pointing that out.

Do you think that this forum should be dedicated to everyone saying anything that comes into their mind without challenge? Perhaps our time would be better spent on the more innocuous things in life…like maybe posting pictures of cats? 🤷
Click to expand...
I think, after seeing you in action all over this forum, you are a very argumentative person, and I’d rather not discuss anything with you whatsoever. Good day…
 
Tim_D said:
Why would a Catholic priest baptize someone who isn’t Catholic and has no intention of being one?
Click to expand...
  1. The point is to give the priest the opportunity to make the invitation to become Catholic. Just because the person refused once (or more) when a relative brought up the subject, that doesn’t necessarily mean that there’s no possibility. The point is to give the priest the chance to at least try.
  2. In danger-of-death (if it should come to that), it’s sufficient that the person express some desire to be baptised; even minimal. At the risk of sounding blunt, it’s better for one to die as a baptised person who misunderstands the faith (but still desires it) than to die completely unbaptised.
  3. It makes the priest generally aware of the situation. If the priest later gets a phone call at 3 AM saying “Father, we need you at grandma’s house right away” he will not have to waste time asking questions; he’ll already be aware of most of the situation.
 
FrDavid96 said:
  1. The point is to give the priest the opportunity to make the invitation to become Catholic. Just because the person refused once (or more) when a relative brought up the subject, that doesn’t necessarily mean that there’s no possibility. The point is to give the priest the chance to at least try.
  2. In danger-of-death (if it should come to that), it’s sufficient that the person express some desire to be baptised; even minimal. At the risk of sounding blunt, it’s better for one to die as a baptised person who misunderstands the faith (but still desires it) than to die completely unbaptised.
  3. It makes the priest generally aware of the situation. If the priest later gets a phone call at 3 AM saying “Father, we need you at grandma’s house right away” he will not have to waste time asking questions; he’ll already be aware of most of the situation.
Click to expand...
Well, that’s all fine and good but none of those situations apply to this case. I just thought it strange that the knee-jerk reaction was to “call a priest” when the woman involved is 1) not Catholic 2) has no intention of becoming Catholic and 3) is not in danger of death. That’s all. It isn’t/wasn’t an attempt at being “argumentative” as some would unjustifiably say, its simply trying to get to the root of the situation.
 
USMC_Convert said:
I said maybe you can talk them into it, in other words maybe she would consider joining the Catholic Church. Why is it you find something to argue about with everyone?
Click to expand...
It was not arguing; it was a very realistic assessment of the situation. I picked up on it in the original post, and it was confirmed later.

The OP inidcated that they do not have a specific church; and that is not at all unlikely as there are a multitude of individuals who have a bible, read it, and feel they are following God’s word, but have no identifiable association with organized religion, be tht Presbyterian, or Apostolic Word of Life.

They have the (not unusual) misunderstanding of the Catholic Church, and it usually runs very deep (that is, it is not just limited to “adoring Mary”) and it could take years to get them to the point of considering entering the Church - if they ever did.

Grandmother has been in the hospital; we have no other information. Death could be several decades away; or it could be soon and very soon. and it is not always announced well in advance.

By all means Grandpa should get the water and get on with it, if they do not have a pastor in mind. and the church would recognize it as a valid baptism, even if Grandma (and/or Grandpa) does not understand that it is any more than a formality which Christ commands. They don’t have to have a clue as to what a sacrament is. They simply have to intend what the Church intends without understanding the substance of what the Church intends.
 
Thank you all for your replies. Grandpa ended up baptizing grandma at home. Now its spreading through my family, which is great. However, my mother ended up thinking that if grandpa could baptize grandma, then I can baptize my mother. Had to inform her that I, as a practicing Catholic, can only baptize in life/death situations. She wasn’t too happy with that. But her and possibly my two uncles are now looking to get baptized.
 
dje101 said:
Thank you all for your replies. Grandpa ended up baptizing grandma at home. Now its spreading through my family, which is great. However, my mother ended up thinking that if grandpa could baptize grandma, then I can baptize my mother. Had to inform her that I, as a practicing Catholic, can only baptize in life/death situations. She wasn’t too happy with that. But her and possibly my two uncles are now looking to get baptized.
Click to expand...
May God bless you and all of your relatives abundantly.
 
dje101 said:
So, my grandmother was hospitalized and released yesterday. I spoke with my mom about whether or not she was baptized and she said she (grandmother) had not been and she and grandfather do not believe it is necessary to get to heaven. I explained to my mom a few clear verses from the Bibke, and I guess she passed it along to my grandmother. She (grandmother) is thinking about having my grandfather baptize her on Saturday before my mom leaves town. Family is not Catholic, and I think she may just be doing this because she knows how important it is to me. Any advice?

Basically, what I’m looking for is
  1. should I encourage a minister to do it instead of her husband? They live in a somewhat rural part of the state, so getting to a church may not be easy for them, especially given that she was just released from the hospital and is still sick
  2. assuming he does it with correct form, will this be a valid baptism? I’m concerned about her doing it just for me, but it’s hard to convince someone to do “what the church intends” when they don’t accept the church in the first place.
Thanks.
Click to expand...
Yes, it will be a valid baptism.
From a Catholic point of view, technically all Protestant clergy are laypeople. Of course Catholics recognize that these people are the proper and appointed ministers within Protestant communities, but sacramentally the Church doesn’t think a Protestant minister can do anything a Protestant layperson couldn’t do. And a layperson can baptize (though in Catholicism, that would only happen in an emergency).
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top