N
nana3
Guest
I have just come across your thread and I am so sorry to hear of yet another woman having to go through this kind of suffering. I have three sisters and my MIL who have had this happen to them. Before I explain to you what happened to them and their experiences and what helped them, I want you to know that I will be praying for you for I have a special place in my heart for women whose husband have left them and are left with unanswered questions. I don’t know how it feels, but I have had to sit up with my sisters all night as they cried and wondered why their husbands left them. So you will be in my prayers, especially in my night Rosary.
My first sister who got a divorce was married for 7 years just as you were. Neither were married before though. He went on vacation without her to visit his parents and when he came back, he told her that he wanted a divorce. He told her that there was not another woman. He was just tired of living without money. They had financial problems. He left her and his two children and left the country. After the divorce, he immediately got remarried, so there was another woman and he admitted that later. Of course, years later, like 5 years into his second marriage, he told me he regretted divorcing my sister, but it was too late.
My second sister to get a divorce also had financial problems and this put a stress on the marriage as well. Her husband said he was tired of living without money also and said he wanted out of the marriage. He left her, the second and final time, and asked for a divorce. He too said there was no other woman involved. He didn’t wait for the divorce before moving in with his mistress for my sister’s kids told her, so there was another woman. They were married for 15 years. He swore up and down there was no other woman and there was no evidence to show there was another woman involved, but apparently he was seeing her for some time. He stopped going to Mass years before with my sister so this did not help their marriage. He didn’t pray with her either.
My third sister was not Catholic, but we all were lead to believe that they had a happy and good Christian marriage. They were married for 16 years and in fact just celebrated their 16th Wedding Anniversary when he came home one day and told her that he didn’t love her and wanted a divorce. He too said there was no other woman involved. He told this to her and to his parents who asked him. He would just get angry and told everyone to mind their own business, including his parents. They had two small children as well. They were just divorced this year in February. We found out before the divorce was finalized that he had a “girlfriend” for his children found out. My sister confronted him and he could not deny the affair anymore, so he had a mistress and this man use to have Bible versus all over his house to memorize. No one would have thought this of him, especially my sister. There was no evidence of the affair.
My MIL also just got divorce at the beginning of this year, but they were both in a second marriage that was not blessed by God. They were married by the Judge. They did not get their first marriages annuled. They were married for 15 years. Their problems were mostly age difference for he was 10 years younger than her, but according to her they were happy. All of a sudden, he asked for a divorce and said he was in love with the woman next door who just happened to have her divorce finalized a month before. She checked his cell phone and found out they had been talking for months before he announced his wishes for a divorce, but she never saw it coming. So he was the only one who did not deny another woman.
All three women are turning to God or have turned to God for strength. The only one who is not handling it well is my MIL. She can’t seem to let go and still believes her husband will return to her some day. She did not go last night to my daughter’s dance recital, her granddaughter, to go to her ex’s family’s house for a visit. My dh was upset over it all. She goes there to find out information on her ex. This is not good for her, but she doesn’t listen.
My sister who just recently got divorced in February is amazing. She is focusing on God, her sons, and than herself. She keeps busy at her job and works out. She is friendly to her ex for her son’s sake, but she has accepted things and moved on. She knows this is not God’s will, but knows that her husband has his own will and has made his choice. That is what you need to understand. Even though this may not be God’s will, your husband does have free will. Pray for him a lot.
I agree with the person who said, don’t dismiss so quickly that there is no other woman. We are not saying this to hurt you and I don’t think that person said it to hurt you. We say it for it could be happening. I just gave you three examples where three men denied affairs and they were having them.
I will be praying for you. My sister’s all kept close to Jesus and the ones that are Catholic, prayed the Rosary.
My first sister who got a divorce was married for 7 years just as you were. Neither were married before though. He went on vacation without her to visit his parents and when he came back, he told her that he wanted a divorce. He told her that there was not another woman. He was just tired of living without money. They had financial problems. He left her and his two children and left the country. After the divorce, he immediately got remarried, so there was another woman and he admitted that later. Of course, years later, like 5 years into his second marriage, he told me he regretted divorcing my sister, but it was too late.
My second sister to get a divorce also had financial problems and this put a stress on the marriage as well. Her husband said he was tired of living without money also and said he wanted out of the marriage. He left her, the second and final time, and asked for a divorce. He too said there was no other woman involved. He didn’t wait for the divorce before moving in with his mistress for my sister’s kids told her, so there was another woman. They were married for 15 years. He swore up and down there was no other woman and there was no evidence to show there was another woman involved, but apparently he was seeing her for some time. He stopped going to Mass years before with my sister so this did not help their marriage. He didn’t pray with her either.
My third sister was not Catholic, but we all were lead to believe that they had a happy and good Christian marriage. They were married for 16 years and in fact just celebrated their 16th Wedding Anniversary when he came home one day and told her that he didn’t love her and wanted a divorce. He too said there was no other woman involved. He told this to her and to his parents who asked him. He would just get angry and told everyone to mind their own business, including his parents. They had two small children as well. They were just divorced this year in February. We found out before the divorce was finalized that he had a “girlfriend” for his children found out. My sister confronted him and he could not deny the affair anymore, so he had a mistress and this man use to have Bible versus all over his house to memorize. No one would have thought this of him, especially my sister. There was no evidence of the affair.
My MIL also just got divorce at the beginning of this year, but they were both in a second marriage that was not blessed by God. They were married by the Judge. They did not get their first marriages annuled. They were married for 15 years. Their problems were mostly age difference for he was 10 years younger than her, but according to her they were happy. All of a sudden, he asked for a divorce and said he was in love with the woman next door who just happened to have her divorce finalized a month before. She checked his cell phone and found out they had been talking for months before he announced his wishes for a divorce, but she never saw it coming. So he was the only one who did not deny another woman.
All three women are turning to God or have turned to God for strength. The only one who is not handling it well is my MIL. She can’t seem to let go and still believes her husband will return to her some day. She did not go last night to my daughter’s dance recital, her granddaughter, to go to her ex’s family’s house for a visit. My dh was upset over it all. She goes there to find out information on her ex. This is not good for her, but she doesn’t listen.
My sister who just recently got divorced in February is amazing. She is focusing on God, her sons, and than herself. She keeps busy at her job and works out. She is friendly to her ex for her son’s sake, but she has accepted things and moved on. She knows this is not God’s will, but knows that her husband has his own will and has made his choice. That is what you need to understand. Even though this may not be God’s will, your husband does have free will. Pray for him a lot.
I agree with the person who said, don’t dismiss so quickly that there is no other woman. We are not saying this to hurt you and I don’t think that person said it to hurt you. We say it for it could be happening. I just gave you three examples where three men denied affairs and they were having them.
I will be praying for you. My sister’s all kept close to Jesus and the ones that are Catholic, prayed the Rosary.