My husband is wrong

[ADiosgracias]

My husband proclaims itself Catholic but he is not .He do not agree with many things that the Church teaches us is a sin. He alluded that his conscience is clear. Some of them are deadly sin. (does not believe in the Church or in the use of NFP, or tradition as a source of our faith, etc.) Despite all this he receives communion on Sundays. For years I tried to make him understand but it seems worse.He would not even to talk about it . When he goes to confession he just says what he thinks is wrong and ignores the other. I need advice.

 

[Samuel63]

I agree with this response. My wife has been contracepting for 26 years and I have not been able to change her. More growth toward holiness occurs when we are having a positive relationship. If I confront her with the sin of contraception, she moves back two steps.

 

[Saber_Mom]

I agree with this response. My wife has been contracepting for 26 years and I have not been able to change her. More growth toward holiness occurs when we are having a positive relationship. If I confront her with the sin of contraception, she moves back two steps.

This is my husband as well. It’s very upsetting to me as I’ve tried to change it - trying to teach him about NFP, etc. He’s not Catholic, so it makes it very hard for me as he sometimes feels he’s being judged. He’s also a doctor and is very anti-NFP. I’ve given him resource after resource and he won’t look at it. He had a vascetomy a few years ago and I’m still heartbroken about it.

I’ve talked with a minimum of three priests and all of them have told me to pray and continue praying for him but not to pressure him. Still, I feel like I am sinning every time I have relations with my husband. It’s an awful feeling. I pray the Rosary daily asking Mary and Jesus to help change his heart or to change me to help lead him to the Catholic church. St. Monica, pray for us.

 

[VeritasLuxMea]

Just to be clear so no one gets the wrong impression - the Church does not require couples to practice NFP. It is totally optional. My wife and I do not practice it. Many other faithful Catholic couples do not practice it.

The Church just requires that couples abstain from artificial birth control.

 

[Saber_Mom]

Just to be clear so no one gets the wrong impression - the Church does not require couples to practice NFP. It is totally optional. My wife and I do not practice it. Many other faithful Catholic couples do not practice it.

The Church just requires that couples abstain from artificial birth control.

Yes. I’m sorry if my earlier post may have implied that. It was not my intention to do so.

 

[VeritasLuxMea]

Yes. I’m sorry if my earlier post may have implied that. It was not my intention to do so.

Oh no, not yours, just when the original poster said her husband doesn’t “believe in” NFP. I assume she meant (by implication) that he believes in artificial birth control but just wanted to clarify that point.

 

[ADiosgracias]

Thank you for sharing your dilemna with us, I will keep you in my prayers!

I have read your other posts, you are 50 years old and you and your husband have a family of six children. This indicates you have been married for some time.

I heard a priest on the radio once get a call-in question similiar to this. His advice was to find what you (as a couple) have in common and BUILD from there. Telling your husband to his face that “he is wrong” might be one approach, however if it is not working then you may need to change things. Clearly you said you have been “trying for years” yet nothing has changed, so time for YOU to change your approach! Find things about your husband that you admire and build from there. Tell him he is a good father and a good Christian and then encourage him. Ask him to pray with you and pray for him! Tell him how much you love him and how much love that God has for him!

I already do that! and I really believed he is a good father, good Christian, but not good Catholic, and I love him so much. Thank you for your advise. Keep us in your prayers

 

[onthisrock]

My husband proclaims itself Catholic but he is not .He do not agree with many things that the Church teaches us is a sin. He alluded that his conscience is clear. Some of them are deadly sin. (does not believe in the Church or in the use of NFP, or tradition as a source of our faith, etc.) Despite all this he receives communion on Sundays. For years I tried to make him understand but it seems worse.He would not even to talk about it . When he goes to confession he just says what he thinks is wrong and ignores the other. I need advice.

You poor soul. If your husband will not listen to you and you were under the true impression that he was a practicing Catholic then Annulment is really your only option so you can live a holy life. Remember God comes first before all human relationships. This would be horrible for me if I had my husband switch on me, especially since we met on avemariasingles.com. But I would always just pray for him, even if/when you leave. See if he is up for counseling with your pastor or going on Retrovaille or Marriage Encounter weekends…depending on if it is as serious as it sounds. If he won’t budge…your job in the Bible is to Obey your husband…He has a harder task…“To Love” that encompasses so much more than feelings. You will remain in mine and my husbands evening prayers. Pray to St. Philomena. I went to her Shrine in Italy and she truly is the “Wonder Worker” She has granted us so many favors…hopefully a child one day…but for now, we have what we need
God Bless You!!

 

[PatriceA]

My husband proclaims itself Catholic but he is not .He do not agree with many things that the Church teaches us is a sin. He alluded that his conscience is clear. Some of them are deadly sin. (does not believe in the Church or in the use of NFP, or tradition as a source of our faith, etc.) Despite all this he receives communion on Sundays. For years I tried to make him understand but it seems worse.He would not even to talk about it . When he goes to confession he just says what he thinks is wrong and ignores the other. I need advice.

I’d be saying rosaries and bringing him to adoration in my intentions until his heart is changed. There really is nothing more you can do, you can’t nag him into being a faithful Catholic. You can’t give ultimatums, you can’t blackmail him. But you can pray to Mary and Jesus to fully convert his heart. Live out your faith to the best of your abilities in the mean time and pray like his soul depends upon it, because it does.

 

[ADiosgracias]

I’d be saying rosaries and bringing him to adoration in my intentions until his heart is changed. There really is nothing more you can do, you can’t nag him into being a faithful Catholic. You can’t give ultimatums, you can’t blackmail him. But you can pray to Mary and Jesus to fully convert his heart. Live out your faith to the best of your abilities in the mean time and pray like his soul depends upon it, because it does.

The best advise!!!

 

[louisak]

I’d be saying rosaries and bringing him to adoration in my intentions until his heart is changed.

Don’t forget the green scapular. And seek the intercession of Saint Monica.