R
rayne89
Guest
This is a vent. So a little back story my husband was raised by a abusive, controlling father and a very docile mother. DH is a recovered alcoholic (15 years sober) who has battled depression all his life. He finally has an amazing therapist which I thank God for everyday.
Growing up birthdays and Christmas -any holidays were not celebrated in his house. Father finally relented when his wife agreed to stop going to church. Lots of history…anyway.
His parents regularly forget to call on birthdays for him and our daughter -and forget cards as well although his dad will raise heck if we should miss one of theirs. My husband did not receive a phone call on his bday but a really nice card came and his father wrote something very nice in it (Just a line basically saying the year he was born was his best year -very out of character.) It touched my husband and I was really happy for him. So yesterday his mom called. During the conversation Father’s day came up. My husband had called his dad from my parents house on Father’s Day to wish his happy Father’s Day (we had also sent a card). His did had not picked up the phone though so he left a message.
His mother said his dad purposely didn’t answer it because it was my parents phone number on the caller ID and it was a slap in face to call him from my parents house to wish him happy Father’s Day. My parents are in their mid 80’s and his family has long been ok with us spending these days with them since they are more than 20 years younger than my parents and realize the holidays we will get to spend with them are running short. Anyway the happiness he had from what his father said in the card just got sucked out of him.
You have to understand my MIL felt the need to tell him as a child his father tried to pressure her to abort him but she refused. He is their only child and my husband has never felt wanted by his dad.
I know this sounds small but my husband has finally come out of a near year of deep depression -his mother should have kept her mouth shut. My husband had forgotten his cell phone and mine was dead. The chance of us calling from my parents line again was negligible. Or at least waited a while maybe wait a couple months not say it right around his bday. He sent a card -he called. His parents forgot his birthday last year and my daughters 16th birthday -their only grandchild. Seriously I’m just so aggravated with their nonsense. Did I mention my mom called and sung him happy birthday and then my dad called and wished him happy birthday and today they are taking him out to dinner for his birthday.
Growing up birthdays and Christmas -any holidays were not celebrated in his house. Father finally relented when his wife agreed to stop going to church. Lots of history…anyway.
His parents regularly forget to call on birthdays for him and our daughter -and forget cards as well although his dad will raise heck if we should miss one of theirs. My husband did not receive a phone call on his bday but a really nice card came and his father wrote something very nice in it (Just a line basically saying the year he was born was his best year -very out of character.) It touched my husband and I was really happy for him. So yesterday his mom called. During the conversation Father’s day came up. My husband had called his dad from my parents house on Father’s Day to wish his happy Father’s Day (we had also sent a card). His did had not picked up the phone though so he left a message.
His mother said his dad purposely didn’t answer it because it was my parents phone number on the caller ID and it was a slap in face to call him from my parents house to wish him happy Father’s Day. My parents are in their mid 80’s and his family has long been ok with us spending these days with them since they are more than 20 years younger than my parents and realize the holidays we will get to spend with them are running short. Anyway the happiness he had from what his father said in the card just got sucked out of him.
You have to understand my MIL felt the need to tell him as a child his father tried to pressure her to abort him but she refused. He is their only child and my husband has never felt wanted by his dad.
I know this sounds small but my husband has finally come out of a near year of deep depression -his mother should have kept her mouth shut. My husband had forgotten his cell phone and mine was dead. The chance of us calling from my parents line again was negligible. Or at least waited a while maybe wait a couple months not say it right around his bday. He sent a card -he called. His parents forgot his birthday last year and my daughters 16th birthday -their only grandchild. Seriously I’m just so aggravated with their nonsense. Did I mention my mom called and sung him happy birthday and then my dad called and wished him happy birthday and today they are taking him out to dinner for his birthday.
) my husband asked what I was doing and I responded venting about your parents on CA. He asked me last night after we got home from celebrating his birthday with my parents what the responses were on the forum so I read them to him. Monica I asked about what you posted because I do do what you described and he agreed it did bother him “sometimes” (probably all the time -he was trying to be nice 
) I told him I would try very hard not to do that anymore.