S
stayathomemom
Guest
I need advice on this situation. I have three children who will all be having their birthdays within 7 weeks of each other, hence we will be having birthday parties. We have a very strained relationship with my inlaws right now, and they are not speaking to us. They have not seen us since May, after my FIL came to our son’s baptism and tried to start an argument with my father inside of the church, and then came to our home afterwards and was begged by MIL not to start an argument with us. He has started arguments before in public places (in a restaurant with me for my husband’s college graduation reception because he was jealous because my mother was holding our 2 month old daughter while she slept). There are other instances in which he has acted in such a manner. The baptism was the last straw, and my husband has told FIL that if he can’t control himself around our children at family functions, that we didn’t want him around us or our children. (My oldest daughter even asked after they left our home for the baptism “Why was her grandfather so mean to us?” ) That 's when my husband put his foot down. They have not come around us since the baptism, because now all of a sudden FIL is denying any wrongdoing (he never denied anything when my husband confronted him the day after the baptism - in fact he was proud of himself) and he is so “distraught” that we won’t let them be around our children and that their son is “not honoring his parents”. (Mind you I offered them to come see the children for Christmas and bring them gifts and they chose to UPS them instead.) This is a man who bullies people around with his anger and expects people to give into him so that we don’t have to deal with his anger fits. My MIL is very manipulative and she is the cause of his anger. She hates me and MIL, FIL, BIL and his wife have been actively trying to get me out of the family before I was officially in it. They are convinced my husband is soooooo unhappy with me, but that is the furthest thing from the truth. We have a very healthy and happy marriage, and I thank God everyday for my husband and kids. I have tried to talk to MIL several times, because she is the root of the problem. She either hangs up on me or doesn’t return my phone calls. I have even resorted to writing her several letters - none of which she answers. There is alot more to tell, but my question now is - Do I invite these people to the party for the children - or do I just leave them alone?