My little brother

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CarloMagnus

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I don’t even know where to begin. I only know that I suffered from a severe depression, or perhaps still am suffering, because of something that happened yesterday. It was so unexpected, so unseen…

I was at my mother’s office with my little brother, who I barely see, and his girlfriend. Him and I don’t talk much anymore, because of a dispute we had years ago. But yesterday we only had just gotten started talking. We covered politics, religion and history.

The dispute was rather loud, because, I’m a ( I refuse to talk about my political beliefs in a public forum) and my little brother, he’s a left-wing Pro-democracy buff with a Protestant education. I resolved all of those things years ago, and I found that the country I lived in was left-wing up to its neck (This includes anti-Catholicism). The conversation turned lighter, as his girlfriend, started showing me movies and pictures.

She made a video of my little brother dancing and it depressed me, I didn’t know why. It was a happy video. And it was meant to be fun.

Today I just realized…I miss my little brother. I miss my little brother, and I was a cold man. Back then it was just him and I. We didn’t have anybody. We had it rough. We would always talk and we’d have fun together. Then the dispute happened and we would barely talk for months or years.

So it was just me.

I realize that I’ve been alone for a very long time. And the only there to have my back was my little brother (This is not the time for the “But God is always there” speech).

I’m trying think up a reason as to why I would put this information on a public forum (not that anyone really cares) but I can’t think of anything rational; logical. I only know I’m deeply upset.

-Karl
 
I think that you must take life a little more easy. Try to relax and think that your brother is safer somewhere else.

There is nothing to fear for there is always a way out of this kind of suffering. Just pray to be ‘untangled’ by God whenever you feel those depressing sad feelings or any feeling that suffocates you.

You are not alone and God will solve all of your feelings. Just assure that you don’t stress out and try to calm down in front of a fire or by taking a walk outside getting some fresh air. God is with you and so is your little brother who is likely happy in heaven. Peace and good to your spirit now and then forever and ever, Amen:)
 
CarloMagnus said:
I don’t even know where to begin. I only know that I suffered from a severe depression, or perhaps still am suffering, because of something that happened yesterday. It was so unexpected, so unseen…

I was at my mother’s office with my little brother, who I barely see, and his girlfriend. Him and I don’t talk much anymore, because of a dispute we had years ago. But yesterday we only had just gotten started talking. We covered politics, religion and history.

The dispute was rather loud, because, I’m a ( I refuse to talk about my political beliefs in a public forum) and my little brother, he’s a left-wing Pro-democracy buff with a Protestant education. I resolved all of those things years ago, and I found that the country I lived in was left-wing up to its neck (This includes anti-Catholicism). The conversation turned lighter, as his girlfriend, started showing me movies and pictures.

She made a video of my little brother dancing and it depressed me, I didn’t know why. It was a happy video. And it was meant to be fun.

Today I just realized…I miss my little brother. I miss my little brother, and I was a cold man. Back then it was just him and I. We didn’t have anybody. We had it rough. We would always talk and we’d have fun together. Then the dispute happened and we would barely talk for months or years.

So it was just me.

I realize that I’ve been alone for a very long time. And the only there to have my back was my little brother (This is not the time for the “But God is always there” speech).

I’m trying think up a reason as to why I would put this information on a public forum (not that anyone really cares) but I can’t think of anything rational; logical. I only know I’m deeply upset.

-Karl
Click to expand...
So…you miss him. Are you ready to let go of the dispute now? Can you mend fences, build bridges, not care if he’s liberal? Can blood be thicker than water? You sound lonely. He’s your brother. If it’s no big deal now, then apologize. Be the bigger man, he probably wants to mend it with you too.

My sons are close and it would break my heart if something like this happened between them.
 
thetruth0flife said:
I think that you must take life a little more easy. Try to relax and think that your brother is safer somewhere else.

There is nothing to fear for there is always a way out of this kind of suffering. Just pray to be ‘untangled’ by God whenever you feel those depressing sad feelings or any feeling that suffocates you.

You are not alone and God will solve all of your feelings. Just assure that you don’t stress out and try to calm down in front of a fire or by taking a walk outside getting some fresh air. God is with you and so is your little brother who is likely happy in heaven. Peace and good to your spirit now and then forever and ever, Amen:)
Click to expand...
He’s not dead.
I’m not sure if you really read what I wrote…

-Karl
 
thetruth0flife said:
I think that you must take life a little more easy. Try to relax and think that your brother is safer somewhere else.

There is nothing to fear for there is always a way out of this kind of suffering. Just pray to be ‘untangled’ by God whenever you feel those depressing sad feelings or any feeling that suffocates you.

You are not alone and God will solve all of your feelings. Just assure that you don’t stress out and try to calm down in front of a fire or by taking a walk outside getting some fresh air. God is with you and so is your little brother who is likely happy in heaven. Peace and good to your spirit now and then forever and ever, Amen:)
Click to expand...
His brother isn’t dead, man. He just saw him.

😊
 
CarloMagnus said:
He’s not dead.
I’m not sure if you really read what I wrote…

-Karl
Click to expand...
I apologize, by your tone it sounded as if he was dead. Getting depressed in front of a video makes it sounds as if he was dead. Once again I apologize.Lmao 😉
 
A wise man once told me just because you’re right doesn’t make it right. I didn’t get what he meant at the time, but now I do. Just because you have good answers to all the major common since issues doesn’t mean you force it on people.
God wants us to Love the person and hate the sin. If those issues are what divides you and your brother then make it a rule that you don’t talk about that stuff. You have to pray for him and continue to reach out to him and show him what you believe through your loving actions. God will continue to tug at his heart. The last line of communicating the word of God is speaking.
Hang in there man we love you out here and we’ll keep praying for you!
God Bless!
 
thetruth0flife said:
I apologize, by your tone it sounded as if he was dead. Getting depressed in front of a video makes it sounds as if he was dead. Once again I apologize.Lmao 😉
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I guess there can be some idea of “dead” involved. He didn’t die. I did. I lost my little brother to my own failings and it’s left me dead.

I couldn’t help how I was. He was just doing things I didn’t agree with. Now we’re older. Even after all of these years, he still knows me.

I’m not looking for pity from other people, but I simply don’t know how to handle how I’m feeling. I’ve never felt like this before. If someone walks away, they walk away and that’s it. They can go to hell for all I care. But this…it’s too much.

Does anyone understand what extreme loneliness feels like? That’s what I have. In nearly every aspect of life I feel so alone. And the one person I know face-to-face who has ever wanted to be around me was my little brother.

-Karl
 
CarloMagnus said:
I guess there can be some idea of “dead” involved. He didn’t die. I did. I lost my little brother to my own failings and it’s left me dead.

I couldn’t help how I was. He was just doing things I didn’t agree with. Now we’re older. Even after all of these years, he still knows me.

I’m not looking for pity from other people, but I simply don’t know how to handle how I’m feeling. I’ve never felt like this before. If someone walks away, they walk away and that’s it. They can go to hell for all I care. But this…it’s too much.

Does anyone understand what extreme loneliness feels like? That’s what I have. In nearly every aspect of life I feel so alone. And the one person I know face-to-face who has ever wanted to be around me was my little brother.

-Karl
Click to expand...
A question for you. Do you want to be right, or do you want to be happy?

It’s time to reconcile with your brother.
 
CarloMagnus said:
You’re telling me to choose between honesty and happiness?

-Karl
Click to expand...
No, that’s not what I mean. Sometimes, being “right” is what WE think is right. Everyone has a “right” viewpoint in every situation. And some of us think we know what is right for the other person too. So, can you let go of what you thought was right, and be happy, and reconcile with your brother now?

Here is another one: How important is it? Ask yourself that about problems, disagreements, grudges, resentments. How important is it REALLY?
 
I’ll pray for both of us tonight at adoration, my friend.

I miss my big brother. Long story…I want to smack him every time I see him 😦
 
CarloMagnus said:
You’re telling me to choose between honesty and happiness?

-Karl
Click to expand...
My sister and her friend were talking with me right there in the room, and the friend said something derogatory about (political group of which I am a member), and my sister totally agreed with her friend…

Yeah, I could have been “honest” and said something, but I just let it slide because I want to be with my family more than I want to show them that my politics are right and theirs are… well, I won’t say 😉

And they even try to draw me out sometimes, and I just say the nicest thing I can, and add on a one-line expression of concern, but nothing for anyone to get upset about.

Just saying, I know what you mean about families and politics.

So, you fought with your brother about politics and now you miss him, but you still feel like you were right. And I suspect that I would agree with you, but the thing is, the reason that you two are not talking is not because of politics but because you two fought over politics. Because the two of you carried the discussion too far. Because you two got carried away with the idea of proving yourselves right and the other wrong.

So don’t apologize for believing what you believe about politics, but apologize for letting it go too far, for letting your desire to change your brother’s mind override your desire to be close to your brother.

That’s what I hear you saying… that’s where I’ve been myself (having a bit of a temper :rolleyes: ). Apologize for what you did wrong. It’ll be hard, but you will feel much better afterwards.
 
I can relate partially to this. I have a younger brother, I was ecstatic when he was born, had a pretty good relationship with him until, sometime in his late teens early adulthood, he became an atheist and not a very cheerful and pleasant-to-be-around one. He once told me off and boy was he mad because I still believed in God/Church (he used a vulgar term with a cuss). Of course I was always very respectful of him and his views, but we fell out some years ago because he got offended that I told him what I truthfully thought about a situation, I was VERY careful how I phrased everything knowing how he was, he told me off, saying how disappointed in me he was. I tried to rekindle our friendship/brotherhood last year but politically, religion-wise, God-wise, we’re worlds apart. I feel no animosity towards him but we have absolutely nothing in common and I don’t want to be around someone where I constantly walk on eggshells and nod yes at everything he says because he gets angry when someone disagrees with him. He doesn’t see me as another human being, he sees me a guinea pig that he’d like to mould into the perfect leftist, intellectual atheist. I entrust him to the mercy of God.
 
Karl,

My brother and I are also at opposite sides of the political spectrum. He is a liberal Democrat and I a right-wing Republican. I am Catholic he is undecided. The thing is: you can still talk with him and even spend time with your brother, and yes you can also talk about politics and religion. The idea is do not try to change the others opinion but respect it. If he starts to talk anti-Catholic things just tell him that you do not want to into an argument with him that you respect his opinion and faith and ask him to respect yours.

I have a signature tiff for my e-mails that is:
Code: 
It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it.   

Socrates  469 - 399
 
CarloMagnus said:
I don’t even know where to begin. I only know that I suffered from a severe depression, or perhaps still am suffering, because of something that happened yesterday. It was so unexpected, so unseen…

I was at my mother’s office with my little brother, who I barely see, and his girlfriend. Him and I don’t talk much anymore, because of a dispute we had years ago. But yesterday we only had just gotten started talking. We covered politics, religion and history.

The dispute was rather loud, because, I’m a ( I refuse to talk about my political beliefs in a public forum) and my little brother, he’s a left-wing Pro-democracy buff with a Protestant education. I resolved all of those things years ago, and I found that the country I lived in was left-wing up to its neck (This includes anti-Catholicism). The conversation turned lighter, as his girlfriend, started showing me movies and pictures.

She made a video of my little brother dancing and it depressed me, I didn’t know why. It was a happy video. And it was meant to be fun.

Today I just realized…I miss my little brother. I miss my little brother, and I was a cold man. Back then it was just him and I. We didn’t have anybody. We had it rough. We would always talk and we’d have fun together. Then the dispute happened and we would barely talk for months or years.

So it was just me.

I realize that I’ve been alone for a very long time. And the only there to have my back was my little brother (This is not the time for the “But God is always there” speech).

I’m trying think up a reason as to why I would put this information on a public forum (not that anyone really cares) but I can’t think of anything rational; logical. I only know I’m deeply upset.

-Karl
Click to expand...
Carlo! We’re all here to help each other and to (for the most part ;)) kindly debate. I think it’s rational to miss your brother. You grew up together. One thing I have found is that we can be friends with people who have dissenting views. It might be difficult at times, but the friendship can prevail if we want it to. Talk to your brother. If you feel that you have treated him badly, then give a sincere apology. Perhaps you guys need to agree to disagree and then just drop certain subjects. Why continuously argue and wear yourselves out, when you could be having a good relationship?
 
Robertanthony said:
I can relate partially to this. I have a younger brother, I was ecstatic when he was born, had a pretty good relationship with him until, sometime in his late teens early adulthood, he became an atheist and not a very cheerful and pleasant-to-be-around one. He once told me off and boy was he mad because I still believed in God/Church (he used a vulgar term with a cuss). Of course I was always very respectful of him and his views, but we fell out some years ago because he got offended that I told him what I truthfully thought about a situation, I was VERY careful how I phrased everything knowing how he was, he told me off, saying how disappointed in me he was. I tried to rekindle our friendship/brotherhood last year but politically, religion-wise, God-wise, we’re worlds apart. I feel no animosity towards him but we have absolutely nothing in common and I don’t want to be around someone where I constantly walk on eggshells and nod yes at everything he says because he gets angry when someone disagrees with him. He doesn’t see me as another human being, he sees me a guinea pig that he’d like to mould into the perfect leftist, intellectual atheist. I entrust him to the mercy of God.
Click to expand...
I think you all misunderstand that this issue with my little brother is purely a political problem where we disagree on politics. That’s not exactly what bothers us. There were some things that happened that he was doing - I’m not saying what - that I disagreed with, which were wrong, and well, at least, I’m pretty sure they were wrong, considering that it was against the law, and it went down from there.

Thank you all for your words. I do feel some comfort.
-Karl
 
I guess if you want your relationship with your brother back, you’ll have to determine whether or not you can accept what he did and move on.
 
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