My niece's desired halloween costume

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AsStAnselmPrays

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My niece (in first grade/who is sleeping over tonight) was looking at a magazine that had halloween costumes in them (a little early, yes, her mother orders her costumes from magazines). She came up to me and my dad and showed us what she wanted to be. The picture she pointed to was a picture of a feminine devil, complete with pink tail, pink horns, and a pink pitchfork.

Immediately, me and my father detested her selection and told her that she shouldn’t want to be a devil. She told us that she loves dressing like the devil and all that horrible stuff. Then my dad said, “Well, if you’re gonna dress up like the devil, then me and Uncle Alex will dress up like devil-killers, angels…God beats the devil, he loses. Why do you want to be the devil?” and she replied, “No, the devil is gonna win, ha! I’m gonna tell grandma on you” (she has a habbit of tattle-taling).

Because of her choice, my father has vowed to restrict her weekly “prize” that she gets from him (prize = some sort of candy, such as a lollypop or gum or something).

So, what should I think/do? Has the devil already planted seeds in her head/heart? I will not humor a first-grader over a costume. I intend to stand up for what is right, and I will detest her choice to the fullest possible extent. But should I worry? This can’t be a good sign…
 
A child of 6 or 7 years old is not at the age of reason yet. Assume this is a child’s idea of play and teasing. Don’t find undue harm in it. She might very well just like the pink color of the costume. Also, don’t make a big deal about the whole thing–the more attention you give it, the more she will dig in her heels. Didn’t you say (in another thread) that you are working at Publix? Then buy the child an adorable pink princess costume (clearing it with her parents first). You will secure your place as her favorite uncle and resolve your issues about the devil costume.
 
La Chiara:
A child of 6 or 7 years old is not at the age of reason yet. Assume this is a child’s idea of play and teasing. Don’t find undue harm in it. She might very well just like the pink color of the costume. Also, don’t make a big deal about the whole thing–the more attention you give it, the more she will dig in her heels. Didn’t you say (in another thread) that you are working at Publix? Then buy the child an adorable pink princess costume (clearing it with her parents first). You will secure your place as her favorite uncle and resolve your issues about the devil costume.
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Thanks. I don’t have the job at Publix first, but I agree with you. If I don’t get her a costume before her mother gets her the one she wants, nothing good will happen.

I’m just worried that my niece is being desensitized to the devil. Sure, it’s just a costume now, but it could keep going, and I don’t want that to happen.

Thanks for the advice La Chiara, I will heed it…time to get some money.
 
Not knowing your niece of course, I’d say she’s going through a phase in her young life in which anything grown ups want her to like she is opposing. I doubt she has any real understanding of who or what the devil is. In many cultures people dress like devils and no harm is in it. Some people just like the thrill of being a bit different. My guess is that’s what’s going on here, too. I’d let her go as anything she wants. She will most likely lose interest in the devil after this Halloween and want to go as a fairy princess next year. The more you make an issue of it, the more she can get the thrill of being different. You can talk to your priest about it, but I wouldn’t worry.
 
Thanks, Della and La Chiara. I’m not feeling so bad right now, but I hope this doesn’t snowball into something bigger (in the present and in the future).
 
I also don’t think it should be made a fuss over. I, personally, hate those “cute” devil costumes, as if the devil is just sort of mischievous and not completely evil, and I would not let my daughter dress up as the devil and glorify it in any way. That being said, she is not your daughter, and I think you’ve done your part in expressing your displeasure. I also think your dad’s response about dressing up as angels was awesome. What a great teaching moment!
 
My mom dressed me up as a devil when I was 3 and I turned out ok. 😃 :rolleyes:
 
…i really think there is possible over-reaction here… i feel the child knows how to gain a little attention, if not from parents, then friends… i think it’s a huge mistake to turn this mole hill into mt everest… IMHO…:cool:

peace:thumbsup:

http://www.hbshows.com/images/spaceghost.JPG
 
I really agree with the posters who think this is overeacting. I dressed as a skeleton one year and I didn’t become anorexic.
 
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AsStAnselmPrays:
then me and Uncle Alex will dress up like devil-killers, angels…God beats the devil, he loses.
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Poor girl probably thought you were going to harm her. I probably would have at that age.
]Why do you want to be the devil?" and she replied, “No, the devil is gonna win, ha! I’m gonna tell grandma on you”
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A totally reasonable reaction for that age group to your “threats”. I’m not going to let you kill me, and I’m telling.
 
Just 2 thoughts. One: maybe you and your dad talk to your sister, the girls mother, and share your concerns. Maybe then the costume won’t be purchased at all. 2: My husband and I decided to scrap halloween all together(and we were big into the whole thing)because of what it stands for and what it is, a night full of demons and witches. Now instead of trick or treat we will have a saints party at our church for the kids and they can dress up as their favorite angel or saint. It’s a great way to celebrate all saints day(which halloween is the eve of). Just my :twocents:
 
Halloween means free candy from the neighbors. Nothing more. It doesn’t worship or honor anything but Snickers, Milky Way and Hershey. I think its time to lighten up. Almost all kids went trick or treating. Few started to worship the devil.
 
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StratusRose:
My mom dressed me up as a devil when I was 3 and I turned out ok. 😃 :rolleyes:
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Well now this explains a lot 😃 (just teasing you) 😛
I agree that it was a good teaching moment, also agree that a child of that age isn’t capable of knowing the difference, (that’s why we teach them) and, it was probably the pink that attracted her attention. I don’t think it would hurt her to dress that way, but, I wouldn’t do it personally, however, I still don’t think there is anything at her age that is going to make her really want that costume unless you keep trying to deter her from it and make a big deal out of it. (perhaps she is just smart enough to want all the attention and she found a big way to get a reaction from you both.)
 
When my daughter was 4 & 5 she was always drawn to the “bad” characters in movies. She had a HUGE thing for Cruella DeVille in particular. She was constantly asking me to draw pictures of Cruella (I got pretty good at it actually ;)) so she could tape them up on her walls.

I tell you all this because we were worried that she was identifying with the baddies too much. We didn’t snuff it but let it run its course. Now she doesn’t even mention poor Cruella. She dresses up like a nun now & wants to be a nun when she grows up - this we do encourage!!!

Kids are always trying to find the boundaries and control situations. Take that classic “no I won’t” to your “yes you will” - They are showing you that you don’t have control over them. It sounds like your niece was trying to get a reaction out of you, show you you can’t control her etc. She might also like the pink costume. Hard to tell sometimes & I don’t think they can tell you why at that age either.
 
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geojack:
Halloween means free candy from the neighbors. Nothing more. It doesn’t worship or honor anything but Snickers, Milky Way and Hershey. I think its time to lighten up. Almost all kids went trick or treating. Few started to worship the devil.
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Exactly, little children are enjoying the FUN (remember what that was) of dressing up, meeting friends and having candy. Also in colder temps its usually the last time children are out and about. One year I was an “angel” and my brother said “you got it all wrong…ha,ha you’re suppose to be the opposite of what you are.” Oh brothers, got to love them:rolleyes: My daughter was a cat once and she never had the desire to drink milk from a saucer.😛 Lighten up and let children have fun.:love:
 
Oh, for crying out loud, she’s a KID who is having FUN!!

She’s figured out how to push your buttons.:yup:

Let her play dress up, pretend, etc. It’s a darn costume. That’s it. Nothing more, nothing less.

The other posters are correct in saying that it is all about candy, running around after dark with friends, and having FUN. (remember that concept?):bounce:

My kids have been Death, black cats, tigers, lions, Jack the Ripper, Scream, Spider Man, Freddy Kreuger…more I can’t think of right now. None of them are anything like any of these evil characters. They are faithful mass servers, involved in church, know what’s right and wrong, etc.

What she wears for 2 hours one night will not matter in the long run of her life!
 
I agree, this is a teaching moment. If any of my children wanted to dress up as devils at that young age, I would have told them we don’t do that because devils are really bad. It probably would be nice to go through the magazine with your niece to talk about some of the other costumes. Little ones usually love to spend time with adults like that. Now if your niece was 14 and wanted to dress up like the devil, I would probably be more concerned…
 
Pick your battles. Build a strong foundation, so that she may heed your counsel later on over IMPORTANT things. My advice … let it go, and don’t forget to tell her she looks adorable and give her a kiss on the way out to trick or treat.
 
I imagine the fact that it’s pink has a lot to do with it.

When I was 6, I had my mom make me an angel costume for Halloween. Nevermind that all the angels in pictures wore white, or that all the other angel costumes I had seen were white, or that even the photo on the front of the pattern was white. Mine HAD to be pink. 😃

I agree with the previous posters who said that 1) she’s not at the age of reason yet and 2) the more you tell her “no”, the harder she’s going to push for it. Kids can be really stubborn, especially if mommy is backing her up.

And- it’s not a bad idea to go out and just buy her a different pink costume.
 
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