My parents do not go to Mass

[Miguelmdza]

Hi. I am an altar server at my parish. Most of the time, I serve, but sometimes, for varipus reasons, I do not serve. Well, my parents always tell me that they will not go to Mass if I do not serve. Sometimes, even if I serve, they still do not want to got. It hurts when they say that they will not go because I will not serve. The Mass is to worship God, not so that I can serve. What can I do? Any advice? Any suggestions?

 

[PaulfromIowa]

As you probably know, your parents are very wrong to have that attitude. Nobody is perfect. It is important to remember that their lax attitude towards God is not your fault. Be joyful and happy about attending Mass and daily prayer and be a good example to them.

 

[tawny]

Pray for your parents. Praying to the Holy Spirit to give your parents guidance & direction to the Church.

 

[jmcrae]

Hi. I am an altar server at my parish. Most of the time, I serve, but sometimes, for varipus reasons, I do not serve. Well, my parents always tell me that they will not go to Mass if I do not serve. Sometimes, even if I serve, they still do not want to got. It hurts when they say that they will not go because I will not serve. The Mass is to worship God, not so that I can serve. What can I do? Any advice? Any suggestions?

First, thank you for your service at the Altar! And thank you for your love for God, and the good example that you set for all of us, both young and old, and that you are a good person who makes the world a better place through your generosity and willingness.

Second - it is impossible to live another person’s life for him, or for her, and you cannot drag people into Heaven against their will; not even your parents. You can only live your own life, and you can only set your own feet upon the path to Heaven.

All you can do is continue to go to Mass, and continue to set a good example. If your parents refuse to go to Mass, this is not your fault. Simply go to Mass without them. Remind them from time to time that you think it would be very nice if they would go to Mass with you, but since they are the parents and you are the child, it’s impossible to force them.

 

[Miguelmdza]

Thank you all for your advice. I will pray and ask the Holy Spirit to enlighten them.

 

[EasterJoy]

I have done altar server scheduling, and we love that server who comes dressed to serve and early enough to check in the sacristy each weekend to see if he is needed, even the Masses when he (or she) is not scheduled. We also tell parents very bluntly that an altar server family ought to be one of the ones who takes the Sunday obligation very seriously. Everyone should, of course, but the young people who are examples to the others ought to be particularly diligent. Alas, you are not alone in your problem. (The other common problem is that the siblings of servers are sometimes unwilling to be conscientious about getting ready on time for their brother or sister who has to be there early.)

My suggestion is simple: the next time you serve, ask your pastor if you can ask him a question privately. Explain your situation, and ask him what to do. He’s going to be your best guide about what to do, and the adult in the best position to help you out.

 

[Miguelmdza]

I have done altar server scheduling, and we love that server who comes dressed to serve and early enough to check in the sacristy each weekend to see if he is needed, even the Masses when he (or she) is not scheduled. We also tell parents very bluntly that an altar server family ought to be one of the ones who takes the Sunday obligation very seriously. Everyone should, of course, but the young people who are examples to the others ought to be particularly diligent.

My suggestion is simple: the next time you serve, ask your pastor if you can ask him a question privately. Explain your situation, and ask him what to do. He’s going to be your best guide about what to do, and the adult in the best position to help you out.

Thank you. I will try that.

 

[Karen107]

Hi Miguel, Here’s a suggestion, First I would say pray for them. You also might want to suggest to them they serve the Lord in some capacity. Maybe a extraordinary minister of the Eucharist, a reader or usher, or even a greeter. You might say something like, it brings me joy in serving the Lord by being an altar server and you believe it would bring them the same joy being part of the mass as well. It may be that God has chosen you to lead your parents an others closer to Jesus. That’s being a disciple.

You never know what will happen unless you ask. Someone who is never asked to do something may not ever step up to do it. Participating in service of the Lord is a great way to bring more of the Holy Spirit into our lives and create in us the desire to go to mass to be spiritually nourished by prayer, the Word and the Eucharist.

You’re being a good servant of God and your rewards will be great! Don’t be discouraged, remember that you are doing Gods will and I personally thank God for you!

Karen

 

[mexolic]

It seems to me that your parents are pleased that your an altar server. They probably don’t see the reason for attending Mass. I could go on and on about what I think are the reasons Catholics refuse to attend Mass. Pray for your parents. Tell your parents that their presence at Mass does matter to you. After all, the Mass is for the entire family.