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Chris_Jacobsen
Guest
Where I attend church, they have confessions everyday Monday through Friday, and twice on Saturday. The lines are almost always long.
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ICXCNIKA
Guest
I’m the only sinner in my parish.I just got back from confession and I’m happy to report that I’m one of the few in the parish who sinned recently!!!Isn’t that great!!!
J
jeffreedy789
Guest
‘Where I attend church, they have confessions everyday Monday through Friday, and twice on Saturday. The lines are almost always long.’
strange as it is to say, i’m very glad to hear that!
strange as it is to say, i’m very glad to hear that!
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Minerva
Guest
wow White Dove that sounds just like my parish too! what’s really great about it is that only the older people are sinners! My 2 friends, my husband, and I are the only sinners under 40 it seems. We really need to get our act together! our priest preaches on sin and conversion alot, so I guess his homilies are really making an impact on everyone else.
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PeterC
Guest
I tried to go to confession and failed. The first sin I confessed was that I am in a second marriage. My intent was to find my way back to the church. The priest said he would not absolve me of my sins until my first marriage was annulled. This was about five years ago.
He wanted to meet with me weekly to discuss the annulment process. We did for awhile. It ended as I lost faith in him specifically. He only wanted to talk politics. I was looking for a confessor and council on other matters.
I still feel burdened with sin and want to confess. I know I can’t receive but I still want to “get rid” of my other sins that have accumulated for more than 50 years.
I would like my confession to be in conversational form and not in a confessional. I believe it will take a couple of hours of discussion.
I am not blaming the priest. I am responsible for my predicament. I wonder if I should try a different priest?
I posted this on another thread and it disappeared. It’s related so I thought I would post it again in this one…
I am among the millions of Catholics who have divorced and remarried. My first marriage was for 19 years while my present marriage has been for over 20 years and will last forever. My first marriage was, indeed, a true marriage. I am who I was and I was who I am. I know a marriage that was not a true union can be annulled. I was a bad guy and left the marriage. I make no excuse that I was not really married.
I do not receive Holy Communion. Tears stream down my face every Sunday as the faithful receive. I don’t budge but I pray to receive Jesus in spirit. I feel the pain of His physical absence. I feel the joy of receiving Him is spirit.
I look around this fairly large church and watch the faithful receive. It seems like almost all of those in attendance receive. Maybe there are two or three like me who abstain.
Where are all the others like me? In a different church? I do not want to deny them and I don’t resent them. I just wonder where the millions of Catholics like me are. Are they receiving anyway? Are they compounding a sin every week by receiving?
What should a person like me do who will not have a marriage annulled? What circumstances must exist for me to receive Holy Communion?
As you probably know the responses were not very encouraging. I know I must face the facts and seek salvation. I started today by beginning the process of gathering the documents to attempt an annulment.
He wanted to meet with me weekly to discuss the annulment process. We did for awhile. It ended as I lost faith in him specifically. He only wanted to talk politics. I was looking for a confessor and council on other matters.
I still feel burdened with sin and want to confess. I know I can’t receive but I still want to “get rid” of my other sins that have accumulated for more than 50 years.
I would like my confession to be in conversational form and not in a confessional. I believe it will take a couple of hours of discussion.
I am not blaming the priest. I am responsible for my predicament. I wonder if I should try a different priest?
I posted this on another thread and it disappeared. It’s related so I thought I would post it again in this one…
I am among the millions of Catholics who have divorced and remarried. My first marriage was for 19 years while my present marriage has been for over 20 years and will last forever. My first marriage was, indeed, a true marriage. I am who I was and I was who I am. I know a marriage that was not a true union can be annulled. I was a bad guy and left the marriage. I make no excuse that I was not really married.
I do not receive Holy Communion. Tears stream down my face every Sunday as the faithful receive. I don’t budge but I pray to receive Jesus in spirit. I feel the pain of His physical absence. I feel the joy of receiving Him is spirit.
I look around this fairly large church and watch the faithful receive. It seems like almost all of those in attendance receive. Maybe there are two or three like me who abstain.
Where are all the others like me? In a different church? I do not want to deny them and I don’t resent them. I just wonder where the millions of Catholics like me are. Are they receiving anyway? Are they compounding a sin every week by receiving?
What should a person like me do who will not have a marriage annulled? What circumstances must exist for me to receive Holy Communion?
As you probably know the responses were not very encouraging. I know I must face the facts and seek salvation. I started today by beginning the process of gathering the documents to attempt an annulment.
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mercygate
Guest
Linda H.:
Dear Fr. Jones, as we discussed last month, I am still extremely uncomfortable that St. Thingamajig Parish does not provide a way for penitents to approach the Sacrament of Reconciliation anonymously, and that the only way this sacrament is celebrated is face-to-face. Since Canon 964 requires that a grille be provided, how can I be of help in providing our parish with this necessity?
Can. 964 intratext.com/IXT/ENG0017/_P3E.HTM
USCCB directive “Built of Living Stones”
The Rite of Penance or Reconciliation
§ 103 § usccb.org/liturgy/livingstones.htm
It is canonically required that confession be available in a setting where anonymity is possible. Mention this to your pastor, using your own personal discomfort as the prompt to do so. If he demurs, write him a gentle letter, cc the bishop:
Dear Fr. Jones, as we discussed last month, I am still extremely uncomfortable that St. Thingamajig Parish does not provide a way for penitents to approach the Sacrament of Reconciliation anonymously, and that the only way this sacrament is celebrated is face-to-face. Since Canon 964 requires that a grille be provided, how can I be of help in providing our parish with this necessity?
Can. 964 intratext.com/IXT/ENG0017/_P3E.HTM
USCCB directive “Built of Living Stones”
The Rite of Penance or Reconciliation
§ 103 § usccb.org/liturgy/livingstones.htm
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mercygate
Guest
You are looking for two things: confession and counsel. Counsel you can have, counsel you need. At this point, as you know, Confession is out of the question. Do start over and try again with another priest. You might or might not like the ultimate answer but you will know that you have done everything you can.
This alone indicates that you have a keen sense of the gravity of all of this. I believe you will receive the graces to handle whatever difficulties or disapointments may come to you along this path.
We are not called to answer this question for others, but remember the rich young ruler? When Christ said, “sell everything you have,” he “went away sorrowing.” Many leave because the Christian life does not accord with their personal wishes. I rejoice in your newfound faith and fidelity.
Again, until you have been told by the tribunal that an annulment is not possible, you really do not know. Is it not better to hunger and thirst for truth than to be content with a counterfeit?
Godspeed.
S
Sea_Knight
Guest
I think part of the reason for the decline in the practice of confession has been the changing attitude towards sin - specifically mortal sin. I think that people generally believe that sin exists and that they need forgiveness, but many see the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass as the medicine for their soul, rather than the sacrament of Reconciliation.
The main responsibility for this change in attitude comes from our priests. Aside from the fact that you hardly ever hear a homily on sin these days (and confessions are usually only held once a week in most parishes, at least where I live), many priests don’t believe that mortal sin is all that common. A priest confessor once told me that when he was in seminary a few years ago, the professor asked “How often do people commit mortal sin?” He said a few of the seminarians believed it was a common occurrence, but the majority believed that it was maybe a once-in-a-lifetime sort of thing (like murder, or adultery).
This change in attitude toward mortal sin is the primary reason why confession is not stressed as it once was.
The main responsibility for this change in attitude comes from our priests. Aside from the fact that you hardly ever hear a homily on sin these days (and confessions are usually only held once a week in most parishes, at least where I live), many priests don’t believe that mortal sin is all that common. A priest confessor once told me that when he was in seminary a few years ago, the professor asked “How often do people commit mortal sin?” He said a few of the seminarians believed it was a common occurrence, but the majority believed that it was maybe a once-in-a-lifetime sort of thing (like murder, or adultery).
This change in attitude toward mortal sin is the primary reason why confession is not stressed as it once was.
L
lovelavender
Guest
Confession is awesome. I guess people just look at it like, “why do I need to tell a priest my sins? Why is it any of his business?” These people are seriously missing out and they don’t know it. It’s so sad. Sometimes I try to express the relief, mercy, and love that I feel after confession to such people but they just don’t get it.
It’s such a sad thing to be the only one at confession. But then sometimes there’s quite a line. You just never know.
It’s such a sad thing to be the only one at confession. But then sometimes there’s quite a line. You just never know.
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mean_owen
Guest
WhiteDove- I’d be glad to visit your parish if I’m ever in your neck of the woods. To help boost your numbers of sinners, that is.
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rwoehmke
Guest
The law of the churtch requires communion once a year during Easter Time, but confession or Pennance is only required once a year if one is in mortal sin. Unfortunately millions are missing out on the graces of encounter with the forgiving Jesus because they no longer understand what a mortal sin is and feel no guilt. We not only need a New Evangelization, we need an education for several lost generations.
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Friar_David_O.Carm
Guest
:tsktsk:I just got back from confession and I’m happy to report that I’m one of the few in the parish who sinned recently!!!
I guess I am the only one to find nothing humorous in this post.
To the contrary, I find it judgemental and critical.
Seems some people are stuck on outward appearances.
It must be nice to have the gift to see into others souls.
I do not go to confession at my parish. I go privately to a monastery near by but when I did go to my parish I would schedule some time with my pastor to do so privately.
No where does it say that one must go to confession only during the times listed in the bulletin.
Actually it is none of anyones business when/if I go to confession. That is between me, my spiritual father, and God.
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PeterC
Guest
ByzCath said:
This (yours) is the approach I would like to take as I contemplate my first confession in over 40 years.
I remember the routine as a child. “…Bless me father for I have sinned, it has been 40 years since my last confession …”
In your private session are the “routine” words used preceding and after your confession or do you confess your sins as one might in a conversation?
In my case I would appreciate an in depth discussion of my sins so the priest has a full understanding far beyond just a list of sins. Hopefully there will be threads of the conversation leading to confession of sins I have completely forgotten at the present time.
On the other hand there may be behavior in my life that I considered sinful and the priest may have a different opinion knowing what preceded the events leading to the specific behavior.
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mercygate
Guest
Peter, Beloved: TALK to a priest before you make a confession. You have serious issues that need to be clarified lest you spill your heart and then find that circumstances might not permit the priest to pronounce absolution: this would break your heart. Pick up the phone and say: “Fr. Jones. It has been 40 years since my lst confession and I want to come home. But first I need to talk with you because there are circumstances in my present life that you need to know.”
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Friar_David_O.Carm
Guest
Peter,
I was not chrismated (confirmed) as a child so I went though the RCIA process. We were incouraged to schedule a meeting with the pastor for our first confession.
It started and was a normal confession. Part of the process can be a dialogue between you and the priest.
I would hesitate setting up a talk with the priest about your sins before you confession, do so during your confession.
The reason I say this is that any talk is not covered by the seal as confession is. Also confession is a sacrament, a talk with the priest is not.
M
mercygate
Guest
Byz – Peter has told us he has canonical issues that could derail a confession. Those need to be addressed in the open forum.
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Friar_David_O.Carm
Guest
They can be dealt with in the sacrament of confession.
If for some reason the priest can not deal with an issue, that only the Bishop can handle, the priest will say so and even if he can not grant absolution everything said will still fall under the seal of confession.
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puzzleannie
Guest
I no longer go in my parish because of exaggerated concern about covering our a-- with regard to the abuse thing the confessional has been closed, and we use the sound-proof cry room, glass walls, two chairs for priest and penitent, in full view of everybody around. Hardly the anonymous setting one would wish. I do what I assume everybody else is doing that no longer shows up here, I go to a national shrine a few miles away that has confessions in several languages for an hour before each of several daily Masses. Long lines, but they move fast.
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PeterC
Guest
Mercygate … Thank you for your advice. Once my primary issue of marriage annulment is resolved as well becoming married to my present civilly married wife in the church, I can’t imagine any circumstances that might not permit the priest to pronounce absolution. Are there past sins that cannot be absolved?
I hope I have not left the impression that the seal of confession is an issue with me. But I understand and appreciate your comments.
What canonical issues could “derail” a confession? If you think my situation might be a good case study in open forum you all have my blessings to have at it!
R
Ray_Marshall
Guest
There is a parish near me that does that.
But they have curtains that can be easily opened and shut on the windows.
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