My past and troubled reconnection

  • Thread starter Thread starter Marc92
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
M

Marc92

Guest
I dont know where to go with this but I’ll keep it short. I’m 26 and have lived a horrible life of sin. I was raised catholic (and still believe to be) and went to church but some how I grew apart from god. Since 12 I have been on drugs and alchohal. I am now sober but have a hard time reconnecting with my faith. I am so ashamed but have a whole that I cant fill. I know priests have heard it all but I’m so ashamed that I cant imagen admitting all of these things again. Hiw do you over come this. I am 4 years sober and want to live right but I’m scared iv gone too far. Between prison and the things iv seen and done… do i deserve his forgiveness?
 
Last edited:
Yes, of course you deserve forgiveness! Please, go to confession, the priests have heard much worse they assure us. You may go behind a screen if you wish to remain anonymous, or sit face to face.

When you go confess your sins and all that you have put behind you, you will receive God’s forgiveness and you will feel the weight of your baggage lifted from you.

Go as soon as you can! It will be a gift to yourself for Christmas!
 
Marc92 said:
I dont know where to go with this but I’ll keep it short. I’m 26 and have lived a horrible life of sin. I was raised catholic (and still believe to be) and went to church but some how I grew apart from god. Since 12 I have been on drugs and alchohal. I am now sober but have a hard time reconnecting with my faith. I am so ashamed but have a whole that I cant fill. I know priests have heard it all but I’m so ashamed that I cant imagen admitting all of these things again. Hiw do you over come this. I am 4 years sober and want to live right but I’m scared iv gone too far. Between prison and the things iv seen and done… do i deserve his forgiveness?
Click to expand...
The only unforgivable sin is the one we’re not sorry for and won’t confess, and die in that sin. Outside of that, all sins are forgivable on this side of eternity. Do a thorough examination of conscience, and go to confession. That is how Jesus set it up to reconcile our bad ways, and our bad selves, sacramentally, back to Him.
 
Last edited:
you will feel your burdens lifted after you have been absolved of all of this, I know it feels stressful and nerve-wracking, but trust me, it will be worse if you don’t go. the priest won’t even know who you are, and God already knows all your sins, so he is waiting for you to approach him so that he may extend his mercy.
 
This is a forum for saints only! Oh wait…
lol. Apologies I’m not trying to make light of your situation at all. The common comment is “the church isn’t a museum for saints, but a hospital for sinners” Every one of us is a sinner. I think about my sins and I often feel the same way you do. I think to myself, what seriously was I thinking… Definitely embarrassed. Sin is horrible and we absolutely must fight it with everything we have. But we have all sinned. Don’t forget about the good thief.

One of our great saints reported that in a vision Jesus said “the greater the sinner the greater their right to my mercy”. Might check it out https://www.divinemercy.org/element...n-divine-mercy/112-trust-in-divine-mercy.html

I would also recommend praying the divine mercy chaplet if you can. It’s a great prayer which can help you focus on Gods mercy, and I often prayed it for penance purposes for past sins, and for those I have sinned against. Taking some ownership and doing something to put into the “spiritual pot” helps me feel like I’m doing some penance. It can also be helpful to apologize to those you can. It’s awkward, sure, but that can really help you and others heal.
At any rate it’s great to have you back in the fold mate, praying for you, welcome home !
 
Marc, you might also find comfort in reading Luke 15, where Jesus tells of God’s joy in finding the lost.
 
Last edited:
It is normal to feel embarrassed and ashamed, that shows you want change in your life. But if you are so ashamed and embarrassed that you can’t confess these in Confession, that’s actually sinning against the Holy Spirit, which is to say you are too prideful to accept the mercy of God and therefore chose to live with the your sin.

So not only is going to Confession a good thing for you, it’s aftually a needed thing. It’s very good to hear you have been sober for a long time, keep it up and know that Jesus wants to forgive you in the Sacrament of Confession, but you must give up your sins in Confession first.

You might also struggle with other sins so try and confess everything you can think of, try and have a really good confession because you get graces to fight all your vices and temptations in confession! If you have used pornography and masturbation those are also big sins that need to be confessed. But nothing that Jesus can’t forgive! The only thing Jesus can’t forgive is if you chose to remain in sin by not believing in Jesus’ infinite mercy due to pride, being ashamed, and being embarrassed because this is sinning against the Holy Spirit.

You will be in my prayers, at Confession you can do it behind the curtain or whatever they are using so the priest can’t see you. Every confessional has this and that should help you fight embarrassment. Also write down all the sins you want to confess beforehand so that you don’t “chicken out” and skip sins.
 
Last edited:
When you confess, you only need to list kind and number, and if you don’t know the exact number, you can give an approximation or average.

So you don’t have to tell the priest your biography, which I can understand might be overwhelming for you, just I got roaring drunk each weekend for 7 years , or I robbed banks three times and shoplifted around 4 times a week for 6 months. (Totally making those up.)

Also add any factors that make it worse: I burglarized places 6 times, and one of them was a church and I took the money for the poor.

If you go to confession with a sincere desire to confess all your mortal sins, they will all be forgiven, along with the venial sins.

If you withhold just one mortal sin deliberately, say from embarrassment, then that confession is sacrilegious and all those sins will have to be reconfessed, as well as any sins from subsequent confessions, and the sin of sacrilege for each sacrament received thereafter. (I made a sacrilegious confession last year, so received the Eucharist sacrilegiously 50 times, and confession 12 times. Here is the sin I did not confess, and here all all the others.)

I am telling you this so you won’t worry about forgetting a sin or leaving something out in case of nervousness or because you didn’t know it was a sin. If that happens, it’s not a problem.

If the recollection of a sin comes to you later, just say it at the end of your next confession, like this: Father, for these and all the sins of my past life, including X, I am mostly heartily sorry.

Congratulations on accepting God’s grace and turning your life around! And welcome back 🙂
 
Last edited:
Forgiving yourself is harder than being forgiven by God.

It takes a while before you might feel forgiven by yourself, after a life of sin myself I didn’t feel forgiven until I’d lived as a Catholic for a couple of years. Believe that you are forgiven by God after confession and then try to relieve yourself of that burden of sin that you have got used to carrying for so long.

Something else which may help, God is constantly with all of us and has heard and seen every sin ever committed. That’s quite a thought.

I’ve no doubt that you will be a precious asset to the Church once more.
God bless.
 
Last edited:
Yes, go to confession. Your being there will give the priest joy that they are helping you return to grace. No one is too far gone to receive God’s mercy if they are truly repentant. That’s not to say you won’t still face hardship, civil penalties, or have strained relationships, but God wants you back. You are a beloved child of God.
 
Two things, the first one is, not capitalising God is a pet peeve of mine. Second of all, do any of us deserve forgiveness? God forgives us, not because we deserve it, but because he’s merciful. You are never too far gone to come back to God.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top