My religious calling at 15?

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LittleFlower777

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Ever since I was very young I’ve adored the sisterhood. Years ago I saw myself as a nun and would have taken the habit then, if I could have. As everyone knows, life get’s in the way. I grew up, became a teenager, like all other teenagers. I became involved with boys, friends, music, parties, and myself. But always desiring to better my prayer life.

In perfect timing, I realized my Confirmation was coming soon. I promised myself to clean up my act before my Confirmation. Everything went well. I recieved my Confirmation with tears in my eyes, because I knew this was an awesome moment for me. It will remain with me forever. I’ve become SO much closer to God. My life revolves around Him now. I wouldn’t prefer it any other way.

A month later, I’m feeling that call to be a nun. It’s not something that comes and goes now, it’s persistent and always here. I study everyone around me as if I were leaving in a few years. Which very well might be the case. Well, I went to my first retreat. I will never forget it. I prayed very hard for God to help me understand what he wants of me.

While praying in front of the Blessed Sacrament, I became overwhelmed with love for God. I thought, “He* is* calling me to be a nun”. I began crying, and just fell in love with Him. So I knew for sure He was calling me. He has been since I was 6 yrs old. When I first told everyone that I was going to be a nun. I was the one who got in my own way, God never stopped calling me.

But now here is when my question comes in. During one of the priests talks, he handed out papers. Now i need to back up a little, maybe, two weeks after I recieved my Confirmation, I did a ton of research on Convents, and came across an old web site that I had found years ago, I remembered that I loved it, they were the Sisters of Carmel, in Colorado Springs, CO. I found them again, and to this day, still cannnot stop visiting there web site. Now I will return, the priest was handing out papers, and I had prayed that God would also help me in telling me if this Carmelite Monastery I was interested was for me. When I was handed one of the papers I looked down, and on the paper was a map. In two different places on the map were the words Carmel, and Carmel Mission. I was handed a second paper and it was a picture of a nun in a Carmelite habit, and again the word Carmel. The funny thing is, this priest we had wasn’t very good at staying on topic, he was supposed to be talking about how Jesus changes our lives, but instead he was talking about Carmelite nuns?? It put me in complete shock. I ran to the church and began balling my eyes out. Do you think I was right in thinking God was telling me my vocation, at the age of fifteen?

I know this is very long, I’m sorry but thank you for any answers. I’m just so afraid, that I’m fooling myself, just so I can fulfill my own will, when I’m thinking I’m fulfilling God’s.

God Bless.
 
Wow, I wish my life had the clarity yours apparently does when I was your age. I don’t think anyone here can definitively answer your question, but I can assure you of our prayers.
You don’t mention bringing your parents into this decision. If you haven’t, you should. They can help you find a suitable spiritual director to help you discern your calling. God Bless you.
 
I believe that someone can be called in early childhood.

I suggest you contact your diocese’s Vocations Director, and see what you can find out about preparing yourself. They can help you better than I can!

God bless you,

Ruthie
 
Thank you for sharing your beautiful story with us! May the Lord continue to Bless you with His love, and fill your heart with His graces!

I am also discerning a religious vocation with the Discalced Carmelites, I will be going for my first Monastery visit in a couple of weeks. I have never talked to a priest or spiritual director about my possible calling, but perhaps if you think it would help you discern better then maybe you should look into it. Of course, keep praying, praying, praying! 🙂

If there’s anything I can do to help, let me know!

God bless you and may He keep you always close to His Sacred Heart.
 
What a great story!

We had our former Associate Pastor over for dinner one night a couple months ago, before he left for another parish. I asked him what made him decide to become a priest. He told us about a dream he had when he was 13, where the Blessed Virgin Mary and 3 priests came to him and clothed him in cassock - is this the right term? He was so moved by it, he told his parents about it, and how he wanted to be a priest. He began his studies at the age of 15, in Mexico. When he left, we bought him a statute of Our Lady of Guadalupe from the Carmelite monastery gift shop here in town - with a note that said, “When times get tough, remember why you answered the call.” He is such a great guy, and we miss him dearly.

God Bless you!
 
Ruthie said:
I believe that someone can be called in early childhood.

I suggest you contact your diocese’s Vocations Director, and see what you can find out about preparing yourself. They can help you better than I can!

God bless you,

Ruthie
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i strognly agree, ruthie. but unfortunately the world today is fond of discouraging vocations to youth.
 
It sounds like you’ve got a very strong faith and hope that you get accepted as a nun. I don’t know if you’ve heard the story of Little Nellie of Holy God who had a very strong faith as a toddler and wanted to receive the Eucharist at 4. I think Christ danced for her or so I read. Hope everything goes well.
 
ForeverHis8827 said:
I am also discerning a religious vocation with the Discalced Carmelites, I will be going for my first Monastery visit in a couple of weeks. I have never talked to a priest or spiritual director about my possible calling, but perhaps if you think it would help you discern better then maybe you should look into it. Of course, keep praying, praying, praying! 🙂
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It is good that you mentioned about spiritual director. Many people who have discerned before us…really know the importance of having a spiritual director. Even living in religious order or at a seminary, one still needs to have a spiritual director.
 
Thank you so much for all your replies! I will definitely look into getting a spiritual director. I will also, no doubt, sooner or later get my parents more involved, it’s just I haven’t talked to them recently about it, It’s just one of those things. I don’t want to say anything and get hopes up, until I’m sure.

Thank you for that story of the priest and his dream. It’s an amazing story! Also, for the web site, I have looked at it. Right now, I’m not only storming heaven with prayers, but I’m also looking into biographies of other saints who entered into Carmelite Convents, such as St. Therese, St. Teresa of Avila, and Edith Stien, I know that was her name before she entered. But they are very inspiring saints to look into…

Thank you again and God Bless you all!
Please pray for me!
 
*LittleFlower777,

What a wonderful story you have.

15 is young in some respects… on the other hand it is never to early to prepare for ones future vocation… whether or not it ends up being in religious life or in some other vocation, all of our life experiences contribute to that journey.

[My own vocation came in the 8th grade when I was going through many vocation classes and tests and knew then I wanted to be a nun… mind you I had to convert first… but that’s a whole other story.]

Some ideas or thoughts come to mind… I hope they will be of some help.
  1. Do find some religious or priest or spiritual director you can confide in. ( This will help greatly with the question of " I know this is very long, I’m sorry but thank you for any answers. I’m just so afraid, that I’m fooling myself, just so I can fulfill my own will, when I’m thinking I’m fulfilling God’s."… By having someone to share your journey you have someone to validate your path.
  2. Do concentrate on your schooling and whatever interests you have. Any religious will tell you to prepare for the future but also to live in the now. “Now” is Gods gift to you.
  3. Perhaps you could find ways of strengthening your faith now? By that I mean surround yourself with church activities. Go on youth retreats. Get involved in your parish as a volunteer.
  4. Sr Helena ( On these forums ) Is a Carmelite herself. Perhaps she might know or recommend some things to you that might help you learn more about the C Carmelite’s or Carmelite saints?
5)There are many things you can do with your time now. (Such as) Read books on the saints. Perhaps investigate the various ways of living out the Carmelite way of life. There are Cloistered Carmelites, Active Carmelites , Semi Active. Have you thought about how you would wish to serve as a sister? In other words what kind?

I am sure others will give you pointers and ideas. I hope that between us ( all) we have been some help.

You will be in our prayers for sure! Blessings of Peace and All Good!*
 
I think it is great what has happened, but I think it is also important to realize that you are a bit young. Your confirmation was not that long ago, and while your decision has not wavered yet, it still sounds like this resurgence in calling is fairly new. I know many people at 15 who have every thing figured out for the future- college, jobs, etc. Very rarely do they stick with it.

You have to understand that biologically speaking, a teenager’s brain is wired for the here and now. It is not fully developed or very good at long term decisions. The frontal lobe is not fully established. That means that this kind of decision is very hard for a teenager to make.

The other issue here is that most orders will not accpet young people for this very reason. Many would like you to have a college education. Nursing is a good major (I have several friends I went to college with who were nursing majors that later went on to become sisters). They want you to experience more of the world. I have one friend who knew from the time she entered college that she wanted to become a Carmelite. The particular order had a problem with a bunch of young women leaving, young women who made the decision to early in their lives and did not take the proper time to discern. They asked her to wait until after her graduation. It was hard for her, but I think it really did help her mature.

I do not say this to discourage you, but to encourage you not to lock yourself in. Make sure you explore all of your options, find a spriitual director as suggested and pray. It could be that this truly is your vocation, but you need to realize that regardless this will be years down the road and you need to make sure that you are listening to God’s will, not just latching onto something that sounds good in the moment. (not that that is what you are doing necessarily, but it’s a common thing). You have not been discerning that long and are filled with the initial zeal of the idea. In reality, discernment is a long process.

I would encourage you to find out if there is a “nun run” in your area. I went on one when I was discerning and it was extremely helpful. It allowed me to visit a lot of different orders and see what they were like and really helped me in the discernment process.
 
LittleFlower777 said:
Ever since I was very young I’ve adored the sisterhood. Years ago I saw myself as a nun and would have taken the habit then, if I could have. As everyone knows, life get’s in the way. I grew up, became a teenager, like all other teenagers. I became involved with boys, friends, music, parties, and myself. But always desiring to better my prayer life.

In perfect timing, I realized my Confirmation was coming soon. I promised myself to clean up my act before my Confirmation. Everything went well. I received my Confirmation with tears in my eyes, because I knew this was an awesome moment for me. It will remain with me forever. I’ve become SO much closer to God. My life revolves around Him now. I wouldn’t prefer it any other way.

A month later, I’m feeling that call to be a nun. It’s not something that comes and goes now, it’s persistent and always here. I study everyone around me as if I were leaving in a few years. Which very well might be the case. Well, I went to my first retreat. I will never forget it. I prayed very hard for God to help me understand what he wants of me.

While praying in front of the Blessed Sacrament, I became overwhelmed with love for God. I thought, “He* is* calling me to be a nun”. I began crying, and just fell in love with Him. So I knew for sure He was calling me. He has been since I was 6 yrs old. When I first told everyone that I was going to be a nun. I was the one who got in my own way, God never stopped calling me.

But now here is when my question comes in. During one of the priests talks, he handed out papers. Now i need to back up a little, maybe, two weeks after I recieved my Confirmation, I did a ton of research on Convents, and came across an old web site that I had found years ago, I remembered that I loved it, they were the Sisters of Carmel, in Colorado Springs, CO. I found them again, and to this day, still cannnot stop visiting there web site. Now I will return, the priest was handing out papers, and I had prayed that God would also help me in telling me if this Carmelite Monastery I was interested was for me. When I was handed one of the papers I looked down, and on the paper was a map. In two different places on the map were the words Carmel, and Carmel Mission. I was handed a second paper and it was a picture of a nun in a Carmelite habit, and again the word Carmel. The funny thing is, this priest we had wasn’t very good at staying on topic, he was supposed to be talking about how Jesus changes our lives, but instead he was talking about Carmelite nuns?? It put me in complete shock. I ran to the church and began balling my eyes out. Do you think I was right in thinking God was telling me my vocation, at the age of fifteen?

I know this is very long, I’m sorry but thank you for any answers. I’m just so afraid, that I’m fooling myself, just so I can fulfill my own will, when I’m thinking I’m fulfilling God’s.

God Bless.
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I don’t like to pull you up short, but you seem to be struck by the supposed romanticism of being a nun in Carmelite habit, just like the Little Flower, your handle.

The Carmelites in Colorado Springs are not affiliated with Rome, first of all. They are sedevacantists. Nice website, nice habit but in schism.

You need maturity, direction and time. The Carmelite nuns you correspond with and visit and your spiritual director will be the first to tell you that.
 
I seriously had no idea that that Carmelite Order in Colorado was schismatic! That surprises me.
 
Maybe anode is someway mistaken in saying they are schismatic. I recommend that you e-mail them and ask them if they are in communion with the Roman Church. If they are not in communion with the Church then maybe you are meant to be a Carmelite but, not of that specific convent.
 
I am sorry I was so negative about your vocation. But I do know that the Carmelite Monastery of the Sacred Hearts (or Jesus and Mary) in Colorado Springs is not in communion with Rome. They are irregular. That doesn’t mean they won’t regularize at some point in the future.

The real lay experts on OCD and Carmelites in general are on phatmass.com in the Vocation Station phorum (their spelling). Any one interested in Carmel should check this out. Go to the May 19, 2009 thread “Carmelite Monastery of the Sacred Hearts of Jesus and Mary”(sorry, I may not have the title of either the monastery or the thread correct–) and read the thread. I don’t think that you have to be a member of phatmass to read the threads. I don’t feel free to copy and paste it here as it’s not my material. If you go to 'Search" and put in “:Colorado Springs Carmelite” you’ll get a lot of threads on this subject. Search under “OCD” or “Carmelites” or “Carmelite nuns” and you’ll get pages and pages of threads. All the differences between the 1990 and 1991 constitutions, OCD and O.Carm., the different associations, etc. are explained. Gobs of photos and links, even to monasteries with no websites.
 
It sure can, and does, happen at a very young age. Look at St Therese, she knew from the time she was VERY young that God was calling her. I’ve known since I was 12 and I think it shows a very unique relationship with God if He calls you at a young age. That’s not to say that if you are a late vocation there’s anything wrong with that.

I will pray for you as you go on this journey. May God bless you today and always!

JMJ+
~Betsy

<3 Totus tuus Maria!
 
LittleFlower777 said:
Do you think I was right in thinking God was telling me my vocation, at the age of fifteen?

I know this is very long, I’m sorry but thank you for any answers. I’m just so afraid, that I’m fooling myself, just so I can fulfill my own will, when I’m thinking I’m fulfilling God’s.

God Bless.
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Little Flower,

I think you know the answer to your own question, since it is contained in your screen name. Therese, after all, was called from early childhood. The truly great advantage that Little Therese had over you is that she was raised in an absolutely devout family and in a time in which true belief in and devotion to our Lord was the norm.

Obviously, I know nothing of your family, and I pray that they are supportive of God’s will. I do, however, know a bit about our society, and about the state of the Church in that society today. Unfortunately, that society may even be reflected in some of the answers you have received so far. Oh, I don’t mean that anyone here really means to discourage you, but I find the tone underlying some of the advice discouraging, nonetheless.

What the heck am I saying?

I’m saying that some posters seem to think you are a child who has suddenly come up with this idea to be a nun; they seem to want to protect you from your silly little self.

The reality, as you yourself report it, is quite different: The Lord has been calling you since you were six years old; for a while you ignored Him, but more recently He has begun calling you in very loud and clear terms. Moreover, you prepared the ground for Him to replant the seed of Vocation in you by “cleaning up your act” prior to your Confirmation. Where I live – which is a religious house of formation, (for men) – we call this “cooperating with grace.”

The question now, for you, is where to go from here? Some of the answers that others gave you are okay, so far as they go:

Yes, get a spiritual director, if you can find one who is competant and truly in communion with the Church. (Remember that both Teresa of Avila and John of the Cross teach that it is better to have no spiritual director than to have a bad one.)

Yes, be cautious about which orders you approach. It is unfortunate but true that there are many religious orders which have strayed so far from the Church and Her teachings that one is tempted to call it mass apostasy.

Yes, take a look at various orders and convents.

Yes, get to know a nun or two with whom you can share your hopes, dreams, concerns, and, most important of all, your love for Christ.

Remember, God is not practical, so all the great practical advice in the world doesn’t take you very far. If God wants you to be a nun, and if you cooperate with His grace, then one of two things will happen: the first possiblity is that you will become a nun; the second is that, because of interference by third parties, you will not become a nun. In either case, God will shower you with grace to the extent that you try to do His will, rather than your own. (I say “try” on purpose. God doesn’t care whether we succed or not, because He could do everything we will ever dream of doing without breaking a sweat.)

So, what should you do, now, in your life situation? As one person put it, live in the now, as God does. But when I say live in the now, I do not mean live like a normal teenager – going to parties, getting involved with neato activities, and the like. You are not a normal teenager. God is calling you, NOW. Therefore, living in the now means living for HIM. (Whether you will be taking your final vows sometime in the next 12-15 years is beyond our capacity to know. He knows, that’s all that matters.) What does matter to you, right now, is that right now, He is calling you to be with Him, NOW. So, be with Him. In other words, PRAY.

Note that I dont’ say pray for guidance, or discernment, or direction, or whatever. Just pray for God to take over your life completely. St. Therese’s morning prayer is a perfect model for this:
O my God! I offer Thee all my actions of this day for the intentions and for the glory of the Sacred Heart of Jesus. I desire to sanctify every beat of my heart, my every thought, my simplest works, by uniting them to Its infinite merits; and I wish to make reparation for my sins by casting them into the furnace of Its Merciful Love.
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O my God! I ask of Thee for myself and for those whom I hold dear, the grace to fulfill perfectly Thy Holy Will, to accept for love of Thee the joys and sorrows of this passing life, so that we may one day be united together in heaven for all Eternity.
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Dear Little Flower,
I knew I would be a Sister when I was twelve, right around my Confirmation. I knew I would be a Franciscan at 13. We have Sisters who knew they would be sisters when they were 6 and 7. It is certainly possible to know your vocation at 15.
It sounds quite possible that you know yours, and time will tell if you are right.

There was a post above that listed a website for spiritual directors. I would not look for a spiritual director that way. Perhaps ask your parish priest or diocese vocation director to suggest someone. A priest would be best because they receive certain charisms for this through ordination. Especially because you are young, you need a good solid spiritual director and you just can’t tell those things from a listing on the internet.

The most important thing for you to do now is to work at growing closer to God. Develop a good prayer life, read the bible, attend daily Masses when you can, offer up little sacrifices and do acts of charity. You could look into different orders and perhaps write them. I would make sure you ask any order you write whether they are faithful to the Pope. It does sound like God may be calling you to be a Carmelite, but there are many carmelite communities.

You have a few years before it will even be possible for you to enter religious life. It may take several years before you are actually ready to enter. Having a good spiritual director would be a good help.

God bless and guide you.
 
It’s not easy to tell if a community is schismatic or not, but I think the Carmelites in Colorado Springs show a lot of signs at first look.

I was once really attracted to what turned out to be a sedevacantist congregation and I only found out through a remark when I was exchanging e-mails with the superior. After that I was on guard and I did notice it between the lines in her e-mails. They were relying on a bishop from the Thuc line for the sacraments that a bishop has to perfom. It really hurt at the time, but I’m thankful to Our Lord for letting me stay faithful to him in His Church. I can’t imagine what would have happened if I had noticed it too late… I have heard of at least one congregation trying to keep girls from leaving against their will. Since you surrender your money and your mail is read, it’s difficult to get away if they don’t want you to. I know a girl who actually escaped. She ran away although she can’t walk without crutches!

Anyway, on the web site of the Carmelites in Colorado Springs, notice the link to the Servants of the Holy Family, who say the Mass for them. Browse around that site and notice they don’t mention any relation to the diocesan bishop. You can contact them and take up a correspondence to get to know them a little, but make sure you read between lines when it gets to their situation in the Church. If you can, find a solid director, but that’s hard in some regions of the globe. I never had one for more than two-three years and now I’m on my own again. If your parents share your Faith, think about speaking with them. Some Catholic parents are very much opposed to their own children considering a vocation, but if they are not, getting their support would be the best thing. Or someone in your parish maybe who can talk these things through with you…

From your story, I think you really should look further into the issue of having a vocation, but it also has to be really clear to you that it’s a life made of a lot of small sacrifices every day and where you don’t “feel” like you’re in love with Jesus most of the time. Instead, most of the time you have to make all these little sacrifices based on Faith alone even though you don’t “feel” anything.
 
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