My responsibility as a Catholic

[Paul1]

I married a women outside the Catholic Church. I took in her 3 children and still have one living with us with his girlfriend and almost 3 years old child.he has been with us the 21 years we’ve been married.We both can’t handle him anymore . He is a heroin addict but just can’t seem to get clean. Hi attitude towards us is nothing but disrespectful and selfish. I don’t want the baby on the streets. What can my wife and I do?

 

[Xanthippe_Voorhees]

You need legal counsel.

Did you officially adopt her children?

Is the girlfriend clean and sober?

Does the 3yo live at your home? If so, how long?

 

[Paul1]

The 3 children were not adopted, the girlfriend seems to be sober, but not sure. The baby has been living with us since he was born.

 

[Xanthippe_Voorhees]

The 3 children were not adopted, the girlfriend seems to be sober, but not sure. The baby has been living with us since he was born.

I think, in that case, you should hire a lawyer and be prepared to take custody of the baby. You may need to fight for the baby’s mother to take custody, negating your son’s rights. You should know your options.

Once you do, talk to the mother. Does she want to care for the wee one? Is she capable? What material support can you provide to her?

Your wife (not you) has a good case for “grandparent’s rights” should your son take the baby and run. However, I would suggest talking to a lawyer FIRST before doing anything, then work with the baby’s mother to see what you can accomplish.

 

[1ke]

You need legal counsel

This. Please seek legal advice.

 

[Paul1]

Thank you, but we are to old and sickly for that option. Prayers will help.

 

[Xanthippe_Voorhees]

Thank you, but we are to old and sickly for that option. Prayers will help.

You are not too old and sickly to fight for the child. This may mean that the child is in the care of your other children, or that you materially support the baby’s mother. It doesn’t have to mean that you will raise the child.

However, given that you have set a precedence for this little one, you are under a grave obligation to see to it that he or she is not mistreated or abused. Given the nature of your son’s addiction the child could be in grave danger. In my area it is not unheard of for addicts to offer their children sexually in return for drugs.

 

[GratefulFred]

You definitely need legal advice which is a bit different in each State.

There are 5 different concerns:

1. Legal efforts to help and limit the potential danger from the addicted son.

1. Protection and help for the mother.
2. Protection and help for the baby.
3. Protection and help for you, the involved grandparents.
4. Ability for help from the maternal grandparents.

The Church’s Social Services might be to help as well, but their help is not the same as legal protection. But they can help and perhaps refer you to a good lawyer.