My sister (a cradle catholic) is going to marry a baptist. My sister and her fiance recently had a meeting with the deacon (as usual for the marriage preparation process). I heard from my mom recently that at this meeting the deacon was very negative about her marrying a non-Catholic plus he falsely stated that the marriage would not be sacramental since she is not marrying a Catholic.
So I’m just sort of distressed by this and wanted thoughts from others.
So, your sister was in the meeting, and then she talked about it with your mom, and then your mom talked with you. Isn’t it possible that something was either misunderstood or got garbled in transmission?
A sacramental marriage takes place when a valid marriage is entered into by two Christians (Catholic or otherwise). A natural marriage is between two unbaptized persons or one baptized and one unbaptized person.
As Cor ad Cor points out, perhaps the situation is that he’s unbaptized.
If so, then the deacon would be right in pointing out that marriages between a Catholic and an unbaptized person can sometimes be difficult, due to differences in belief systems and religious practice. In fact, in these cases, the Catholic person is asked to affirm that they know that it may be difficult to hold to the practice of the faith and that they intend to do so, as well as to do everything in their power to baptize and raise any children from the marriage as Catholics. In addition, the non-Catholic is asked to affirm that they know the promises that their Catholic fiancee has made.
Perhaps this is what your sister or mother characterized as “negative”?
Whether the marriage is ‘sacramental’ or ‘natural’, the wedding ceremony can take place in church. If your sister’s fiance is unbaptized, then the ceremony won’t take place in the context of a Mass. (If your sister’s fiance
is a baptized non-Catholic Christian, then a Mass is a possibility, but often, is not recommended (since the Eucharist wouldn’t be a sign of unity for the couple).)
