My struggle with masturbation

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fromckcc

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Here’s the thing. When I was younger, I was sexually abused by my aunt. She would fondle my penis from time to time. This felt strange(really strange), but after some time it started to feel normal. When I found out that Jesus said that if anyone looked at a woman lustfully, then he had already committed adultery with her in his heart, I was petrified because I did this all the time. I think I was either 5 or 6 when I found out. I didn’t need porn to start these fantasies. It just followed because it was nothing new. I discovered masturbation accidentally.

I have succeeded in not masturbating since July and I’m very proud of that because that is the longest period of time I have gone(since I started masturbating) without engaging in it. This is partly due to the fact that I started college last fall and am an engineering student so I was either busy of tired most of the time. From time to time the urge came and during the thanksgiving break I was literally floored because the urge was so immense, I almost lost my mind. But towards the end of the semester it kept getting greater and now I’m on break and I just can’t seem to get it out of my mind for long. I say both the rosary and chaplet of divine mercy daily but it just seems to be getting stronger. The lust just seems part of me because I have done it most of my life. I keep fighting but it seems to me that sooner rather that later, my resolve will be broken.
Will it be considered sinful?
 
I need prayers! I feel like I am losing the battle against masturbation. The temptation is getting stronger. It was so strong that i was actually trembling because of the intensity of the urge. I need prayers. I have gone six months since it last happened and I am trying to avoid it. It is always on my mind. I prayed both the rosary and the rosary of liberation back to back but the temptation was still strong.

Please I need prayers. I don’t want to die in a state of sin. I’m not terminally ill of in danger, but no one knows tomorrow. Please pray for me.

Thank you and God bless.
 
Good for you and your courage to take on this struggle with the help of God’s grace!

I ask Our Lady, St Joseph and St Michael to protect you from the evil one.

Keep exercising and keep busy but most of all:

I highly suggest finding a priest who will annoint you with Holy Oil and pray for your release from the temptations being waged against you. Since you were abused as a small child, the evil one can attach himself to you in ways that can be released by the Annointing of the Sick and prayers for healing and deliverance.

:signofcross:
 
I am very sorry to hear that you had to go though that. Rose of Sharon has given you good advice. To that advice I would add find a group of devout men to hang out with, it doesn’t matter the age, just that they believe strongly. When i was in a similar situation i asked Jesus to send me Catholic friends, people who would not hurt my faith. On a retreat I met a devout older man who introduced me to other like minded men. I did this and it has helped me grow in my faith tremendously. So much so that I started to volunteer and met more friends who are closer to my own age at that. To be able to sit down and speak about scripture and all things Catholic has helped take my mind off of other things detrimental to my salvation.

Lord, inflame our hearts and our inmost beings with the fire of Your Holy Spirit, that we may serve You with chaste bodies and pure minds. Through Christ our Lord. Amen
 
It’s still just as sinful as when you started your first thread on this.

PLEASE find a spiritual director who can help you with this. While a lot of people here will pray for you, I don’t think you’ll find the help you need (I’d encourage you to start a Prayer Intention thread). You’re shopping around on the internet for an answer that you like and I think you may need more assistance than that.

I hope you can come to understand and accept what others have already explained to you.
 
Hang on to your resolve and your prayers tightly… it will help! Keep in mind that temptation is not a sin- temptation is a great opportunity for you to grow in faith! The stronger your temptation, the closer to God you are! Our enemy does not like that you are growing in faith and God is allowing him to test you! It’s hard, but see it as a gift! I read a book called “manual for spiritual warfare” and it said some very interesting things about temptation. Worry not when your temptations to sin are strong, because it means you are close to God and the enemy seeks to lead you away- you have more cause to worry if you aren’t being tempted because that means the devil sees you moving in his direction and isn’t seeing a need to work on you. Every time you are tempted and pray through it to get past it you’ve won a great battle against a formidable foe! St Padre Pio was always tempted by the devil with lustfull temptations. I’ve also struggled with this for a long time myself and find the only thing that helps is to break habits that I used to do that brought on the urges. When the urge takes hold, immediately pray to God and ask our Lady for her intercession as well. It may also be a good idea to go to confession… giving yourself a clean slate will help you stay strong. The purer your soul is, the less hold the enemy has on you.
You can do this, especially because you are armed with a prayerful life and your rosary! You aren’t fighting alone.
 
Joelle_M said:
Hang on to your resolve and your prayers tightly… it will help! Keep in mind that temptation is not a sin- temptation is a great opportunity for you to grow in faith! The stronger your temptation, the closer to God you are! Our enemy does not like that you are growing in faith and God is allowing him to test you! It’s hard, but see it as a gift! I read a book called “manual for spiritual warfare” and it said some very interesting things about temptation. Worry not when your temptations to sin are strong, because it means you are close to God and the enemy seeks to lead you away- you have more cause to worry if you aren’t being tempted because that means the devil sees you moving in his direction and isn’t seeing a need to work on you. Every time you are tempted and pray through it to get past it you’ve won a great battle against a formidable foe! St Padre Pio was always tempted by the devil with lustfull temptations. I’ve also struggled with this for a long time myself and find the only thing that helps is to break habits that I used to do that brought on the urges. When the urge takes hold, immediately pray to God and ask our Lady for her intercession as well. It may also be a good idea to go to confession… giving yourself a clean slate will help you stay strong. The purer your soul is, the less hold the enemy has on you.
You can do this, especially because you are armed with a prayerful life and your rosary! You aren’t fighting alone.
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Thanks for the reassurance. I’ll keep fighting. I heard a story about a woman who was tempted with lustful thoughts for a long time and once she gave in she died. I don’t want that to be me. No one knows tomorrow. That is one of the main things helping me maintain my resolve. If I can stay strong for at least two weeks i feel I’ll be able to overcome. Till then it will be a struggle.
I don’t want to go to hell.
 
Trust me, I am 100% in your shoes. This past few years I’ve felt a huge call to come back to my faith, and in doing so, I discovered I really knew very little about my catholic faith at all. I am living in sin with my BF of over 17 years and our 15 (almost 16) year old son. I’ve been trying to convince my man to marry me but to no avail. I struggle with lustfull thoughts as well as am stuck in a complicated living situation. I am on the verge of making some huge life changes because I’m terrified that my life will end abruptly and I will have wasted all of God’s precious attempts to bring me back to Him and wind up in hell. I am reminded multiple times a day that if I were to die now- all would be lost:( Worse than that, however- is that I will die knowing I didn’t set a proper example for my almost grown son and didn’t do enough to lead my atheist partner to salvation.
We all carry heavy burdens, but the heavier the load, the greater the reward. God is allowing you to suffer through this because He WANTS you to succeed and become closer to him! This is his call to you, he’s calling you home. Your soul is stronger than the enemy’s my friend- because unlike the devil’s- it’s capable of love! Love is of God- and it’s the greatest thing you have! Wear His love as your armor and surround yourself with our Lady and the angels. The devil can’t touch you- all he can do is tempt you and he is no match to God’s holy army.
 
fromckcc said:
I need prayers! I feel like I am losing the battle against masturbation. The temptation is getting stronger. It was so strong that i was actually trembling because of the intensity of the urge. I need prayers. I have gone six months since it last happened and I am trying to avoid it. It is always on my mind. I prayed both the rosary and the rosary of liberation back to back but the temptation was still strong.

Please I need prayers. I don’t want to die in a state of sin. I’m not terminally ill of in danger, but no one knows tomorrow. Please pray for me.

Thank you and God bless.
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Praying! Trust that God is stronger than your temptation, and go to Him for help, telling Him of your desire to stay out of sin. Ask your Guardian Angel for help too. If you sin, trust in His mercy, and go to Him in Confession.

We’re all struggling up the path to holiness. You’re not alone.
 
Andrea_Day said:
Praying! Trust that God is stronger than your temptation, and go to Him for help, telling Him of your desire to stay out of sin. Ask your Guardian Angel for help too. If you sin, trust in His mercy, and go to Him in Confession.

We’re all struggling up the path to holiness. You’re not alone.
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Thanks. But this sin is one of the most severe.
 
fromckcc said:
Thanks. But this sin is one of the most severe.
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Don’t be so hard on yourself! You aren’t the only one out there struggling with this, and certainly won’t be the last! God knows your heart! He knows you want to do better! Jesus understands your struggle because he came to earth and was tempted by satan as well! Keep doing what you’re doing and TRUST that God is carrying you through it.
 
Joelle_M said:
Don’t be so hard on yourself! You aren’t the only one out there struggling with this, and certainly won’t be the last! God knows your heart! He knows you want to do better! Jesus understands your struggle because he came to earth and was tempted by satan as well! Keep doing what you’re doing and TRUST that God is carrying you through it.
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Exactly. 👍
 
do what i do.

i started to trick my mind.

everytime i thiught abiut it, i instead clicked on catholic answers and started reading threads or articles. tune into am 1000.

you have free will.

its been a while since i gave in.

everytime you think of lustfull thoughts change what you are doing.

you have to change the habits that lead to the sin.
 
I feel your pain man, I know that urge. Good job on the prayers and on avoiding sin. You need to get out and exercise. Exercise is a great way to get the testosterone out of your system. Lift weights, do cardio (running, swimming, etc.) Just hit the gym harder than you ever have before. Simply not masturbating doesn’t usually work, you need to find a healthy outlet.
 
fromckcc said:
Thanks. But this sin is one of the most severe.
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I hesitate saying this because of your previous posts where you attempted to justify this sin. But I will tell you anyway. I do not think that you should be too anxious about the severity of this sin. What you are experiencing is a form of addiction, and the Catechism says that addiction mitigates your culpability. Please note that it does not make it not sinful, it simply means that you do not have full consent if you are addicted. You should never use addiction as an excuse to remain in sin. You would be culpable for your actions if you were to do that. But what it means is that when you do fall, don’t beat yourself up. Go to confession, say a rosary, and keep fighting. God loves you.

You should know that life without masturbation is a better life. Many men have said that when they gave up masturbation, they were better able to enjoy a lot of things in life and were also better able to relate to women. I believe there is an entire subreddit about this… Your desire to overcome this sin should be motivated by a love for God and a desire for the betterment of your own life, not a fear of punishment.
 
Here’s something that seems to work well for me, that I heard from Father Larry Richards. Whenever you feel the temptation to do ANY sin…then pray…not for YOURSELF… but for someone else! When you feel the temptation, start praying and blessing someone, imploring God to bless and protect this other person. In my case, I always pray for my daughter.

And guess what happens…Satan finds that the only thing he accomplishes by tempting you is to cause God’s blessings to shower down upon someone else!
 
Joelle_M said:
Don’t be so hard on yourself! You aren’t the only one out there struggling with this, and certainly won’t be the last! God knows your heart! He knows you want to do better! Jesus understands your struggle because he came to earth and was tempted by satan as well! Keep doing what you’re doing and TRUST that God is carrying you through it.
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This is Awesome ^

I also want to add, Don’t sit there and feel guilt and shame trying to “hide the sin from God”

That sort of thing seems to be why people get so caught up in the “fighting sin, alone” idea, as if God is waiting outside your bedroom… God is Right There With you, in you, all around you. God understands better than anyone what brought the problem to you.

Pray for your Aunt!

I was sexually abused in some very extreme ways as a child, so I understand struggles with this, and self injury, etc. very personally. I keep in mind, God is with me, while I’m being tempted… sometimes it feels like I’m being Controlled… (people can get “programmed” by abuse) and sometimes I simply forget to acknowledge God before I sin… >.>

But I try =)

Sean
 
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