H
HoldingGodsHand
Guest
After struggling with doubts and fears, having a hard time trusting God for more than a year now… I am finally to a place in my faith where I can trust God. I’ve come to accept that I can’t have all my questions answered and it’s ok to just believe. Finally, I feel some peace and hope. My faith is growing now! I think I’m even a little bit happy for the first time in a long time. But then today I get this thought in my head to be careful because something can come along at any moment and take all that peace away, so don’t be too happy.That’s the old me way of thinking and I just need to ignore it now. But I hate that my brain always does this to me! My whole life I’ve been a thinker and questioner, always want to understand something before I trust it. It was hard coming back to my faith and letting go of all of that. It took me a very long time to learn to let go. I’m still working on it I guess. Right now I’m happy to just believe and trust, it’s so much easier this way! It gives me hope in this noisy world that’s always saying the opposite. Really I hate the world, or at least I hate that the world seems so against all that I am trying and want to be. My stupid brain doesn’t help either. Shut up stupid brain!! 
I should ask, is that just the evil one speaking to me??
I should ask, is that just the evil one speaking to me??