I feel compelled to point out that there are real people reading and participating in this thread and on this forum for whom this hypothetical scenario is very real. Some of them have written passionate defenses of the teachings of the Church, acknowledging that while they endure this trial, they will be faithful. Those who are advocating an easy way out (which is neither safe nor easy) or a more compassionate response from the Church (the Church is most compassionate about both the physical and spiritual wellbeing of every member of the human race) are doing injury to these faithful souls. I respectfully ask you to stop advocating against the teachings of the Church, to stop insisting that the use of NFP and abstinence by marriage couples is wrong. And please do some research or go talk to your priest or both.
The Church has never said that a couple must have as many children as possible.
She has never said that a couple must intend to conceive with each act of intercourse.
She has never said that a couple must completely give up their married sexual life if they need to avoid future pregnancies.
She has only stressed the intrinsic link between sexual intercourse and procreation, and the twofold purpose of the marital act (procreative and unitive).
It is not a sin to intend to avoid pregnancy. It would be a sin to attempt to engage in sexual relations while rendering the act sterile. The Church has fully explained Her meaning about this, so there can really be no misunderstanding for those who have read the teachings.
Finally, there is a difference between the intent and the means. The ends do not justify the means. Sometimes the end (what you intend to have happen) are moral, but we might be tempted to use evil means to accomplish that end. But as Catholics, we all know that we may never do evil that good may come of it. Therefore, using contraception to avoid pregnancy is wrong; however, using abstinence, either periodic or total, to avoid pregnancy is acceptable.
If you cannot understand or accept the reality that the means and the end are not the same, but are in fact different moral aspects to consider when deciding upon an action, then this is a crucial time to speak to a priest about this matter. But please for the love of God, and out of true compassion for the many couples who must endure the trial of using NFP or complete abstinence in their marriages, stop insisting that abstinence (including NFP) in marriage is the same as contraception. And please stop insisting that it is immoral for a married couple to abstain. This is patently false and it is stubbornly hurtful to many people who will view this thread.
