Need advice from you..

[hushpuppy]

That would bug me. Is your brother poor because he can’t work? If I give a gift, I give it because I find joy in the giving. I like to think the gift I’m giving is giving joy to the recipient. If the recipient gives all my gifts to someone else, I would see the recipient of my gifts as having a disdain of not only the gift, but of the giver as well. In this situation, I would feel taken advantage of. I would no longer feel the joy in the giving of the gift. I would feel it’s a chore. I would feel I’m “funding” my brother’s charity causes, and I’m not so sure that’s my job.

So, I really don’t think I’d give him those particular gifts anymore. But, that’s just me. And I ain’t no saint.

 

[Marilena]

leoyballe:

I hope this does not sound critical. I just want to encourage self-analysis and reflection.

A true gift is something totally given away, as someone mentioned earlier.

This tendency among many to feel hurt when their gift is given away can indicate attachment and not total giving away.

Have you considered whether you have truly given these things to your brother as gifts? Based on your description, they seem to have very strong invisible strings still connected to your hands/heart.

Thus, instead of “gifting” them away – you just moved their location from your shelves to his.

This issue has been accepted, and i have changed my feelings about it. Again, I thank you all for your posts. God bless you.