V
Vincenzia
Guest
About 10 years ago when I was very active in the church youth group, my priest asked myself & my boyfriend to be the Godparents of a little boy. The family had just moved to our area & we knew hardly anything about them. I personally was not happy about being put in this situation. I knew this was a huge responsibility & was unsure about being able to handle it. I had discovered that the parents of this little boy were having troubles & selfishly, I didn’t really want to get involved. I also didn’t know them well enough to become a part of their life. Against my better judgment I went ahead & stood as Godparents for this boy. After the baptism I didn’t hear from them… at all. It wasn’t until almost 2 years afterwards that the father of this child showed up at my work claiming he & his wife had divorced & under extremely strained circumstances. He made several claims yet later when speaking to the priest that involved us with this family he admitted there was some abuse going on in the relationship. I kept my distance yet when the father found out I was no longer involved with my boyfriend he began pushing the idea that I would be a wonderful mother to his son. He visited a few times at my job, each visit grew more and more uncomfortable. He would make comments about marriage and laugh them off or would stand much too close to me. My coworkers met him as well as he was visiting during work hours & they too were unsettled by his words & actions, mostly his interest in me. My coworkers actually intervened a few times, at one point a fellow sales person physically stood between me and him while I was working so he would back away. They also would tell him I was away at times as he would stop by to see me or call. He would make comments “in jest” about poisoning his wife and how horrible of a mother his ex-wife was. I spoke to my priest again to inform him of my concern for not only my safety but the safety of the ex-wife and child. My priest told me the situation was under control & I left it in his hands. It was years before I heard from this man again. He showed up at my work with a startling suggestion. I’d like to make it clear that I had no contact with him, nor the child, nor did I have any way to get in contact with them as they moved around a bit. Anyhow he showed up at work again to tell me he was off to Iraq (serviceman) & he wanted me to sign some papers before he left. These papers gave me custody of his child in case of his death. I wouldn’t sign them. Both he and his wife had family which didn’t make much sense to me. I hadn’t seen his wife or even knew where she was & still don’t. He left & I didn’t hear from him for almost 7 years.
Recently he showed up at my work with his son this time. I’ve seen this child maybe 4 times over the past ten years, since he was born. This last time was the only time this little boy could have remembered the visit or me. He was a baby when I’d seen him before. During this visit my husband was there & I introduced him to them. We had a strained conversation for a few minutes, mostly catching up with the little boys activities. My husband excused himself & I started to follow. Once my husband was out of earshot the father became increasingly angry asking me when I had gotten married & why I hadn’t told him or invited him. He also reminded me I was in his will, which threw me for a loop. His son was standing next to him during this one sided conversation and I didn’t want to cause a scene so I simply let him carry on. I thanked the little boy for visiting and excused myself, hoping to never see them again. Considering how angry he was about my marriage I’d thought I’d seen the last of him but he just today called my work. I was not there but he did tell my manager how upset he was that I wasn’t calling his son as he spoke about me constantly & wanted me be a part of his life. The manager & I spoke as she was concerned about the way this man spoke about me & acted on the phone.
I’m torn. This little boy is blameless in this situation but I personally don’t want to be involved in this volatile. This man makes me feel extremely uncomfortable. For lack of a better word he’s creepy. I’ve never known where this child was over the past several years. I’ve had hardly any contact with them, no exchange of addresses or phone numbers. He just today left a phone number for me to contact him. If he is so concerned about the presence of a Godparent in his sons life why hasn’t he contacted his Godfather? The situation has gotten a bit out of hand. I do admit I am fearful of him and would prefer not to speak to him but I can’t help but think about the boy. I also feel a bit railroaded by the priest in this circumstance & I’m not sure involving him now would do any good. Is there a way to take my name off the baptism certificate? Maybe there is someone else in his life that would be able to take this role? Any advice?
Recently he showed up at my work with his son this time. I’ve seen this child maybe 4 times over the past ten years, since he was born. This last time was the only time this little boy could have remembered the visit or me. He was a baby when I’d seen him before. During this visit my husband was there & I introduced him to them. We had a strained conversation for a few minutes, mostly catching up with the little boys activities. My husband excused himself & I started to follow. Once my husband was out of earshot the father became increasingly angry asking me when I had gotten married & why I hadn’t told him or invited him. He also reminded me I was in his will, which threw me for a loop. His son was standing next to him during this one sided conversation and I didn’t want to cause a scene so I simply let him carry on. I thanked the little boy for visiting and excused myself, hoping to never see them again. Considering how angry he was about my marriage I’d thought I’d seen the last of him but he just today called my work. I was not there but he did tell my manager how upset he was that I wasn’t calling his son as he spoke about me constantly & wanted me be a part of his life. The manager & I spoke as she was concerned about the way this man spoke about me & acted on the phone.
I’m torn. This little boy is blameless in this situation but I personally don’t want to be involved in this volatile. This man makes me feel extremely uncomfortable. For lack of a better word he’s creepy. I’ve never known where this child was over the past several years. I’ve had hardly any contact with them, no exchange of addresses or phone numbers. He just today left a phone number for me to contact him. If he is so concerned about the presence of a Godparent in his sons life why hasn’t he contacted his Godfather? The situation has gotten a bit out of hand. I do admit I am fearful of him and would prefer not to speak to him but I can’t help but think about the boy. I also feel a bit railroaded by the priest in this circumstance & I’m not sure involving him now would do any good. Is there a way to take my name off the baptism certificate? Maybe there is someone else in his life that would be able to take this role? Any advice?
